Commentary:
"My dogs don't feel earthquakes because they're too busy creating their own seismic activities with their non-stop gas emissions! 🐶💨🌍 #EarthquakeProofPups"
54 Funny dogs quotes
Paw Patrol is just annoying. Exactly how long do dogs live again on average?
Commentary:
"Paw Patrol: training our children to expect talking dogs saving the day 🐾🦸♂️ As for the dogs' lifespan, let's just hope they have enough years left to endure all those rescue missions! 🐶🕰️ #LiveLongAndPawspurr"
Never understood why people train their dogs to sit pretty or roll over when there are useful tricks like empty the dishwasher or fold the laundry.
Commentary:
"Who needs a dog that can high-five when you can have one that can fold laundry like a pro? 🐕👚 Let's revolutionize dog training one chore at a time! 💪🐾 #DomesticatedSuperheroes"
My boss doesn’t want dogs in the office. But he didn’t say anything about alpacas.
Commentary:
Looks like someone found a sneaky loophole in the office pet policy! 🐶❌🦙✔️ Forget "take your dog to work day" – it's all about "take your alpaca to work day" now! Watch out, your boss might soon be giving you the side-eye during team meetings with an unexpected furry friend by your side. 😂🦙👔
Men are like dogs. They’re actually cute, but having my own would be too much work for me.
Commentary:
"Men are like dogs 🐶💁♀️. Sure, they're cute and all, but who has time to clean up their messes and take them out for walks? 🤷♀️ Maybe some treats and belly rubs will do the trick instead! 😉🐾"
Dogs naturally form packs, and if left undisturbed, will teach themselves how to play poker.
Commentary:
It's all fun and games until the dogs start bluffing with their tails 😄🐾🃏 Who knew our furry pals were secretly planning their next poker night?! Someone better keep an eye on those sneaky canines before they start dealing out ruff hands! 🐶🎲 #PokerPaws #DoggyDealings
All dogs go to heaven, but I never see them in church.
Commentary:
"Well, maybe they're just not into the paw-fect attendance policy 🐾🐕 Who can blame them though? With all that unconditional love and tail-wagging joy, they've probably already secured a spot in doggy heaven anyway!"
I’m basically a taxi today for the kids and dogs.
Commentary:
"Ah, the glamorous life of a chauffeur to mini-humans and four-legged furballs! 🚖👶🐶 Who needs a limo when you've got a minivan full of chaos and cuteness? 🚗😂 #ParentingLife"
If dogs ever learn to talk, I want everyone to keep in mind that mine is a big fat liar.
Commentary:
"If dogs could talk, it would be a whole new level of drama at the dog park! 🐶🗣️🤥 Just imagine the tall tales your furry friend might come up with! Better hide those socks before they spill the beans about who the real sock thief is 😉🧦"
I learned that when dogs lean against you it’s their version of hugging and now every time my dog leans against me my eyes start leaking.
Commentary:
"Who needs tissues when you have a dog? 🐶❤️ Your furry friend is just helping you with your hydration levels! #DogHugsAreTheBest"