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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇷🇼 has viewed:

The collective noun for a group of narcissists should be an ‘egosystem’.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has bookmarked:

Problems are like balls. Everyone thinks they have bigger ones than you.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has viewed:

“Your account balance is low!” Brother, wait until you see my will to live.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has copied:

Can I just skip to the part in my life where I’m rich and happily in love?

Someone from 🇧🇳 has viewed:

Liquor on the top shelf is so expensive because the bartender has to stand on their tippy toes to reach it.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has bookmarked:

People see me spending money and think I’m rich. No, bro, I’m just irresponsible.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has viewed:

So a baby crawls across the floor to it’s bottle and it’s cute but when I do it Im in need of an intervention?

Someone from 🇹🇭 has bookmarked:

I want the dreams to chase me for once.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has bookmarked:

Imagine being all knowing and still putting a snake in charge of apples.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has downloaded:

Auto-correct and I are in a toxic relationship.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,669

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via WhatsApp:

If your family starts fighting on Thanksgiving, go live.

Breaking via WeChat:

There’s nothing scarier than sneezing with a full cup of coffee in your hand.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

Ever since I was a little girl, I’ve always known I wanted to be a woman with a lot of money when I grew up.

Shared recently on Instagram:

Someone said I should think before I speak and I said “eww what a horrible way to live”

Shared recently on Telegram:

Dating these days is like trusting a crackhead to come back with your change.

Seen just now on TikTok:

You gotta be careful: don’t say a word to nobody about nothing anytime ever.

Just landed via Messenger:

The sluttiest thing a man can do is have an ethical dilemma over his lust for you.

Spreading quickly via Discord:

Our neighbor complained that our cat is always running through his garden. My father said: “Okay, I’ll tell her.”

Spotted on WeChat:

Every time my kids start whining, I get the urge to call my mom and apologize.

Live now on WhatsApp:

My yoga instructor was drunk today. Put me in a very awkward position.

Funny going outside quotes

Funny going outside quotes are the perfect dose of laughter for those who’d rather stay in but know fresh air is calling 🌞😂 Whether you’re a cozy homebody or an adventurous soul, these witty lines bring a smile to every step outdoors 🚶‍♂️🌿 Get ready to giggle and maybe even embrace the great outside with a little humor and a lot of fun! 😎🌈

New funny going outside quotes 👇

All funny going outside quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

49 shares on Slack this month:

I caught two kids smoking pot outside my office. Fifteen minutes later, my boss caught me and two kids smoking pot outside my office.

90 shares on Telegram this month:

Figure skating is so niche that sometimes I walk in the rink, and there’s an Olympic medalist there.

47 shares on Telegram this month:

The theory that two stacked beds can’t be converted into two regular beds has been debunked.

60 shares on Reddit this month:

Love that every time I finish a snack I have to wave my hands around to prove to my dog it’s all gone, like I’m cashing him out at a casino or something.

15 shares on Twitch this month:

I’ve asked so many people what LGBTQ stands for. So far no one has given me a straight answer.

81 shares on TikTok this month:

I’m retired. I was tired yesterday and I’m tired again today.

74 shares on Reddit this month:

Insanity runs in my family. It practically gallops.

16 shares on Reddit this month:

Incense sticks are just disappointing sparklers.

37 shares on Instagram this month:

Someone asked, “Can I bum a scroll?” because they deleted Instagram off their phone.

21 shares on Messenger this month:

I was googling about the best time to visit the Maldives. It’s when you have money.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

12 folks are currently checking 👀

My husband told me that he used my sock trick on a recent trip, so he wouldn’t lose any. Reader, my “sock trick” is rolling matching pairs together.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Dads hate stopping on road trips because then all of the vehicles they worked hard to pass for the last hour get back ahead of them.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

I drive regularly so that my brain doesn’t forget swear words.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

As I’m cleaning my room, this is a friendly reminder that you actually don’t need that free t-shirt or tote bag from that event.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Do you also have teenagers whose styling motto is: freeze to death for coolness?

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Caught my husband staring at me again. He’s probably weighing his pros and cons.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

I am not the person I thought I was when I cut that donut in half.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Japan’s greatest tragedy is having the world’s best toilets and no Mexican food. What’s the point of owning a Ferrari if you never take it to the track?

25 folks are currently checking 👀

“Bluetooth or Insane?” is a fun game we all play when we see a lone person speaking out loud in public.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

So I just googled my symptoms, turns out I’m addicted to you.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,535

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇩 has bookmarked:

Ironically, the Internet was invented to save time.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has downloaded:

Actually, no one sees you at your worst like your coworkers do.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has bookmarked:

Good news: I set an all time high today! Bad news: It’s my cholesterol.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has downloaded:

I was about to organise my closet, but I then I found what I was looking for.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has downloaded:

Remember it’s Christmas. You need to check your elf before you wreck your shelf.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has downloaded:

Moms be like, “I needed this,” and it’s really just a break from being the one who holds it all together every single day.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has copied:

I took some free community martial arts lessons for self-defense, but I’m starting to think Tai Chi is too slow for most muggers.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has viewed:

If you ever have a crush on someone and want it to end, listen to a podcast they are on.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has copied:

Why do fish stink so much even though they bathe their whole lives?

Someone from 🇷🇸 has viewed:

I am “I can’t remember the last time I went out on New Year’s Eve” old.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Instagram:

Trying to spend less time on my phone so I can get back to something I’ve loved since childhood: watching TV.

Going viral on WeChat:

Is there an app yet that converts voice messages into text messages?

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Some people you look at or hear talking and think to yourself, the wheel may be turning, but the hamster is dead.

Trending via LinkedIn:

That looks like a problem for someone else.

Going viral on Snapchat:

Welcome to your 40s. A random back pain will be assigned to you shortly, and you’ll never know what flares it up every time.

Going viral on YouTube:

When someone tells me “They could care less”, instead of the proper “I couldn’t care less”, I always say “At least you care.”

Trending via LinkedIn:

On the whole, people are getting smarter. I remember when they had to put “The End” on the screen, so people would know the movie was over.

Broadcasted on Twitch:

Just said “shitted feet” instead of “fitted sheet” in front of my my son and his friends. If you need me, I’ll be in the closet.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

Sunday night: Super Bowl party! Monday morning: Toilet Bowl party!

Spotted on Reddit:

So many people say they love their Roomba, but you never see them set it free.

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