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10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from 🇳🇿 has shared:

I childproofed my house but the kids still get in somehow.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has bookmarked:

At my next job, I’m gonna lie about having a kid so I can leave the office anytime I want like everyone else with children.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has downloaded:

Can’t be sexting when you’re somewhat articulate. You just sound like a vampire.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has downloaded:

Me: This is a hard escape room. Manager: You’re at work.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has viewed:

If you comment to say “No comment,” you have, in fact, commented.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has downloaded:

The dead bodies on Mt. Everest remind me that it’s perfectly fine to stay home and be lazy.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has viewed:

My cat just knocked over my coffee mug and looked at me like it was my fault. How dare I put it on the edge of the table?

Someone from 🇸🇻 has shared:

Ragebaiting each other is flirting, btw.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has copied:

Being shy is so annoying. Why is my chest hurting me, because I need to speak in public?

Someone from 🇲🇩 has bookmarked:

I don’t argue anymore. I just agree and let the plot unfold.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,747

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Instagram:

My son put his dish in the sink so I rushed him to urgent care.

Just landed via TikTok:

Normalize arguing with plants who refuse to stay alive.

Broadcasted on Threads:

I want to be in Metallica, and they will not let me.

Making waves on TikTok:

Hey boy, are you my period? Because you’re annoying as hell but I still wanna see you regularly.

Just landed via Threads:

The most difficult thing you’ll do as a parent is not rearrange the ornaments after the kids put them on the tree.

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

Immediately de-escalating an international conflict by posting an angry looking selfie with the caption “Come on, guys.”

Seen just now on Instagram:

Where do they get the seeds to plant seedless watermelons?

Freshly posted on Threads:

Remember when we were young and said “I’ll sleep when i’m older”? Well, now we can’t when we want to.

Just landed via Reddit:

What have I done to deserve this? Oh yeah, right, I remember.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

I put my pants on like everyone else. With hope they still fit.

Funny Linkin Park quotes

New funny Linkin Park quotes 👇

I found out my husband was cheating on me at a Linkin Park concert. We tried so hard and got so far, but in the end, it didn’t even matter.

3 weeks ago

betrayal, breakup, cheating, concert, end, even, found, got, hard, humor, husband, i, irony, linkin, Linkin Park, matter, me, music, park, relationship, tried

All funny Linkin Park quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

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Social Media Stars ⭐

22 shares on LinkedIn this month:

My hair will never allow me to commit any crime; I leave my DNA everywhere.

53 shares on TikTok this month:

Definitely thought I’d be solving mysteries and unmasking ghosts in a van with a dog by this point in my life.

75 shares on Slack this month:

I don’t understand how I can remember every word of a song from 1984, but I can’t remember why I walked into the kitchen.

46 shares on Pinterest this month:

I wish flies spoke English, so I could say, ‘Hey, if you don’t leave right now, I am going to kill you so hard.’

65 shares on Pinterest this month:

Easiest way to ragebait a finance bro is to start the ‘why can’t we print more money’ conversation.

16 shares on YouTube this month:

Dating is so overrated. Let’s just get married.

89 shares on Messenger this month:

Life hack: give yourself 8 to 12 hours of alone time in the morning to mentally prepare for the day.

56 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I get it, orcas. Sometimes you just need to ruin a yacht to feel something.

26 shares on Facebook this month:

There are approximately 1,010,300 words in the English language, but I could never string enough words together to properly express how much I want to hit you with a chair.

58 shares on TikTok this month:

British people be like “I’m Bri ish” cause they drank the “T”

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇭 has shared:

You know you’re getting older when you keep asking “Why do they have to make the instructions so small?”

Someone from 🇲🇺 has viewed:

Sometimes I apologize to my car when I hit a pothole.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has downloaded:

The light at the end of the tunnel is only the headlight of the oncoming train.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has viewed:

Julia Garner most confusing name because it calls to mind both Julia Roberts and Jennifer Garner, but she is neither.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has viewed:

White Lotus is a cautionary tale about taking time off from work.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has viewed:

If you comment to say “No comment,” you have, in fact, commented.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has downloaded:

My signature move is forgetting someone’s name 2 seconds after they tell me.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has downloaded:

“I’m disgusted by how many of you still use Spotify. I use a fair trade, ethically conscientious mom-and-pop platform called Apple Music.”

Someone from 🇸🇴 has copied:

I’m not actively avoiding you. I don’t actively do anything.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has copied:

Tonight I will make history, by turning off incognito mode.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Twitch:

If Pokémon were real, state fairs would serve them deep fried on a stick.

Just shared via Reddit:

Life is pretty much just a series of awkward and embarrassing moments, separated by snacks.

Just landed via Discord:

Asking the waiter for her phone number and then texting her “can I have more coffee?” two minutes later.

Trending via Telegram:

At the dispensary asking which strain will stop the yearning.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

There’s really nothing as pathetic as watching a sad little man argue with Grok in hopes of manipulating the conversation to get an answer he wants.

Spotted on Slack:

Bitcoin is just Kohl’s Cash for boys.

Trending via Threads:

The same mosquito kept biting me last night. It probably thought it was at a wine tasting.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

The lioness does not concern herself with the pile of clothes she moves between bed and chair every day.

Just landed via WeChat:

“Normalize this, normalize that.” How about y’all feel shame for once?

Just shared via Twitch:

I deliberately don’t go to bed early. I don’t want to look like I could be useful for anything the next day.

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Funny Linkin Park quotes

New funny Linkin Park quotes 👇

I found out my husband was cheating on me at a Linkin Park concert. We tried so hard and got so far, but in the end, it didn’t even matter.

All funny Linkin Park quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨