Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇧 has shared:

Nothing brings neighbors together like a few cops cars in front of another neighbor’s house that no one likes.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has copied:

Being abducted by aliens could be just the vacation I need right now.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has shared:

This summer I’m going cicada mode: emerging briefly from my house and being really loud until I find a mate.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has bookmarked:

My love language is caffeine and being left alone until I’m kind again.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has bookmarked:

Whenever I see an athlete eating quark, I get sad, because the quark could have been turned into cheesecake.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has copied:

Save money by accidentally forgetting your wallet at home. Follow me for more financial tips and tricks.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has bookmarked:

Please don’t delete your post. Yes, it was pretty stupid, but my reply to it was a masterpiece.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has shared:

I think it’s time when we buy new clothes that we have the option to buy the body they’re being modelled in too.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has copied:

Grandma complained that with age, her joints were getting weaker. Told her to just roll them a little tighter.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has downloaded:

Ah yes, my abandonment issues due to all the abandonment.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

94 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,363

Funny Quotes Topics

17,479

Funny Quotes Images

15,363

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,535

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Telegram:

Ok, new plan, I’m gonna marry a Kardashian.

Trending via Pinterest:

I’m just a girl standing in front of a cat who followed me to the bathroom.

Going viral on Discord:

There are two types of people: Those who steal food off your plate and those who you keep in your life.

Making waves on YouTube:

I will sit in the rain about this.

Breaking via Snapchat:

I think my dog always follows me to the bathroom because I always follow him outside and he thinks that’s the way it works.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

Interviewer: Why do you want to work in customer service? Me: Well, I’m really good at apologizing for things that aren’t my fault.

Spotted on Messenger:

Everyone wants a drunk text until I’m doing it at noon.

Just shared via Messenger:

Almost all of my bad decisions are food-related.

Making waves on Threads:

Wealthy person who has no problems and also meditates sometimes: Meditation is my secret weapon.

Trending via Messenger:

The next James Bond should be weird. Like he wears a train conductor’s hat and is afraid of balloons.

Funny Matt quotes

Funny Matt quotes bring a burst of laughter and good vibes to any day 😂✨ Whether you’re looking for witty one-liners or clever jokes, Matt’s humor never fails to brighten the mood 🎉🤣 Get ready to share some chuckles and spread smiles with these gems that perfectly capture his playful spirit 😎💬

New funny Matt quotes 👇

All funny Matt quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

47 shares on Reddit this month:

A sandwich has the power to change your entire life.

43 shares on WeChat this month:

Rich people don’t put their couches against their wall. I moved my couch into the middle of the floor and still haven’t gotten rich. I don’t know what I’m doing wrong here.

68 shares on WeChat this month:

Maturity is when you realize money can actually buy happiness.

29 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Beware. There are people in the grocery store that you know who want to chat with you. Stay vigilant.

53 shares on Reddit this month:

Sleep is a beautiful thing. You don’t miss anyone, you can’t do anything wrong and you simply feel nothing.

53 shares on Pinterest this month:

The endings of Lost and Game of Thrones each cost me a television.

24 shares on Reddit this month:

I want a girlfriend so she can make me do shit like pottery, and I act like I don’t want to go.

43 shares on Telegram this month:

Apparently I lack empathy, according to some stupid cow in HR.

65 shares on TikTok this month:

Praying to God with a Chinese accent, and he is cracking up.

85 shares on Threads this month:

I took the road less traveled because I was hoping not to run into anyone I know along the way.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Waffles are just pancakes with convenient boxes to hold your syrup.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

I know it’s true because the people on the internet said so.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

The smaller the woman, the bigger the attitude. It’s science.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Sat at a stop sign waiting for it to turn green, if you’re wondering how I’m doing today.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

If you live in the same hemisphere as me, you’ve probably already heard me sneeze.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Oops, I think I’ve had a little too much to think.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m trying to cut back on how much sense I make.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

I need to hire someone to just constantly slap food out of my hand.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

If your first child is uncomplicated, then it’s a trick of nature to get you to have a second child. The second will be an unpredictable bundle of energy that seems to get by without sleep.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Dear deodorant manufacturers, please stop writing “72h” on your products. There are people who believe that. And they sit next to me on the bus. Always. All of them!

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

94 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,363

Funny Quotes Topics

17,479

Funny Quotes Images

15,363

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,715

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇿🇦 has viewed:

I don’t have any rizz but I do have snacks in my purse.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has bookmarked:

Beer is like weed for people with jobs.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has bookmarked:

Y’all are single because y’all are looking for 90’s love in this sick generation.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has viewed:

If we were subway rats, I’d share my pizza crust with you.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has copied:

Dear Apple, at no point will I ever text someone “he’ll yeah” ..

Someone from 🇦🇪 has viewed:

Men invented pool tables so they could watch each other bend over.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has downloaded:

New COVID variant tries to sell you an extended auto warranty.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has shared:

The share button on Reddit should be called Spreddit.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has viewed:

I can’t wait to get married so I can bring home unnecessary stuff and get yelled at for it.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has viewed:

My couch better stop looking at me like that, it knows exactly what it’s doing.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via X:

According to my Spotify Wrapped, I am what got played the most this year.

Making waves on X:

Wild that we could have been foraging for berries and dying off at 33, but we chose this nonsense instead.

Trending via TikTok:

Using Indeed feels like being an ugly guy on a dating app.

Seen just now on X:

I give such good nudes that nobody ever needs to ask me for a second one.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

I found out my husband was cheating on me at a Linkin Park concert. We tried so hard and got so far, but in the end, it didn’t even matter.

Spotted on Facebook:

Is ‘ugh’ an emotion? Because I fell it all the time.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

Lady on the streets, Cheeto crumbs in my sheets.

Spotted on Discord:

Hey boy, are you the sun? Because you were a big part of my life this summer but now I feel like I never see you.

Just shared via Slack:

If I was a little smarter, I’d be aware of how stupid I am.

Going bananas on Threads:

Sometimes all you need is a Saturday to sleep, eat, and do absolutely nothing else all day.

© 2025. All rights reserved.

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴