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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇲 has downloaded:

I treat people the way I want to be treated by not leaving the house.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has shared:

Aura is the real business card.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has copied:

Posing for photos has to be the most basic thing I’m actually terrible at.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has shared:

I’m writing a book on the joys of drinking beer. So far I’ve been through a lot of drafts.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has copied:

9-5 is really 10-2 if you’re working remote.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has shared:

When your kid asks you where the other parent is, they’re really saying that they’d like to speak with the manager.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has copied:

I find it extremely hard to believe that you’re rolling on the floor laughing.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has shared:

If I got a Dollar for every time I thought about you, I would start thinking about you.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has viewed:

I miss my bed. Why does it have to be so far from where I work?

Someone from 🇪🇨 has copied:

Packed all my meds into one bottle for a trip and accidentally invented the best trail mix.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

817 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,979

Funny Quotes Topics

13,919

Funny Quotes Images

10,979

27 minutes ago

3,425

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Messenger:

They say we learn from our mistakes, that’s why I’m making as many as possible. Soon I’ll be a genius.

Just landed via Reddit:

I have an emotional support chicken roasting in the oven.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

I get it, sauce, I also thicken over time.

Broadcasted on Twitch:

I’m not even sure what I’m doing on this planet.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

Gen Z will be like “OMG new life hack!” and then it’s a video of them adjusting the toaster dial.

Shared recently on TikTok:

You think you’re your own worst critic? Just wait till you have kids.

Just shared via Threads:

Men will ruin your whole life then come back and like your story.

Seen just now on TikTok:

If you give me a serious answer to a silly question, I’m giving you a wedgie.

Seen just now on Reddit:

Standing on a scale and thinking: so much wisdom and inner beauty can’t be light.

Just landed via Instagram:

This whole week could have been an email.

Home » Funny Private Person Quotes

Funny private person quotes

New funny private person quotes 👇

5 months ago
Share →: I’m a private person except for when I’m publicly trauma dumping on social media.

Commentary:
"Living that 'private person by day, public oversharing by night' lifestyle 🤫💻 Embracing the art of social media therapy like a pro! 💁‍♂️💬 #KeepingItReal"
6 months ago
Share →: The secret to being a private person is to overshare dumb shit so people think you are an open book but then not tell them any of the important details of your life.

Commentary:
"Oh, the art of bamboozling with a sprinkle of cunning! 🤫💁‍♂️ Oversharing a buffet of trivial tidbits to distract from the vault of deep secrets? Masterful strategy or just pure genius? 🤔🔒 Either way, it's all fun and games until the important info remains under lock and key! 🗝️😄 #SneakyButStylish"

For even more funny private person quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny private person quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

817 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,979

Funny Quotes Topics

13,919

Funny Quotes Images

10,979

27 minutes ago

3,437

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇹 has copied:

Keep your friend’s toast and your enemy’s toaster.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has shared:

That song stuck in my head is “Don’t Speak”; I have no doubt in my mind.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has downloaded:

“Seize the day!” No thank you. I will leave the day alone and hope it extends me the same courtesy.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has downloaded:

Hit my coworker with “you’re a lucky man” after I saw a picture of his wife just to let him know that I want to sleep with her.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has shared:

If being hydrated is such a great thing, why does it feel like my bladder is pissed off?

Someone from 🇩🇰 has viewed:

I can’t wait until I’m old enough to pretend I can’t hear.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has downloaded:

Conflicts may arise but always remember to be the bitter person.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has copied:

According to the smoke alarm, the food is ready.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has bookmarked:

I feel like people just come to the airport to cough.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has bookmarked:

They are mad because you took that knife out of your back and used it to cut ties.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Discord:

Every year, just in time for Christmas, when it’s freezing cold, the Coca Cola truck shows up. Now, in this freaking heat, it’s nowhere to be seen.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

A mustache is just mouth bangs.

Breaking via Telegram:

Almost fell asleep while putting on the sweater because it got dark for a moment. That’s all you need to know about my morning state.

Trending via Pinterest:

I used to schedule naps, but now they’re little surprise parties my body throws at all hours of the day.

Just shared via Facebook:

Now that Christmas and New Year are out of the way, we can focus on the things that really matter: My posts.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

I lost my job at NASA Mission Control today. I misheard when they said, “It’s lunch time.”

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

Thinking of starting a true crime podcast. Gotta explain this search history somehow.

Making waves on Slack:

Perfume is designed to be an invisible accessory. It’s not designed to instantly kill the canary when you entered the room.

Spotted on Reddit:

I will never forget how to spell bananas, thanks to Gwen Stefani.

Reported on Pinterest:

Unloading the dishwasher in the opposite direction just to feel something.

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