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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇱 has downloaded:

Twitter is an abusement park.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has bookmarked:

Your child learning to say mommy is when your life begins and ends.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has copied:

If we date and break up, you gotta unlearn all my lingo and cool shit that I taught you. You gotta go back to being lame.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has bookmarked:

I think fathers lose their mind a little bit when they realize their daughters aren’t as forgiving as their wives.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has shared:

I don’t hate anyone in particular, I just hate everyone in general.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has bookmarked:

Of course, a wife can complain to her mother-in-law. She has every right to complain to the manufacturer.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has viewed:

I think Cinderella should have lived a happy life with all her animal friends rather than settle for a man who had her try on a shoe because he didn’t recognize her without makeup.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has shared:

Why hasn’t Lululemon created a bra-line named Lulumelons?

Someone from 🇨🇩 has downloaded:

If he doesn’t like your fruit puns, you need to let that mango.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has downloaded:

Please help my husband and I decide on dinner. We’ve narrowed it down to “It doesn’t matter” and “It’s your turn to choose”.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,383

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Discord:

Dear brain, please finally learn the difference between hunger and boredom. I’m getting fat.

Broadcasted on Reddit:

I don’t know who needs to hear this, but I think people who say ‘I don’t know who needs to hear this’ know exactly who needed to hear it.

Making waves on Instagram:

I’m not lazy, I just really enjoy doing nothing.

Shared recently on YouTube:

Got a job rejection, saw the company post the same job again, so I applied again. I decide when we’re done.

Live now on Snapchat:

I can literally trace the moment my career died back to when my boss said he was in back-to-back meetings, and I said, “Isn’t face-to-face better?”

Trending via Twitch:

Giving all the dogs in my neighborhood matching sweaters for Christmas so they can be in a gang.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

Public urination isn’t a crime if you do it in your pants.

Breaking via Reddit:

The more I insisted marshmallows were vegetables, the angrier my doctor got.

Seen just now on TikTok:

4 out 3 people struggle with math.

Making waves on Snapchat:

“I asked ChatGPT.” Okay, well, I asked my mom.

Funny resurrection quotes

Funny resurrection quotes bring a hilarious twist to the idea of coming back to life 🧟‍♂️✨ Whether you’re in need of a good laugh or some lighthearted inspiration, these witty sayings will have you chuckling like a zombie at a coffee shop ☕😂 Get ready to revive your mood with humor that’s truly alive and kicking! 🎉🕺

New funny resurrection quotes 👇

All funny resurrection quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

76 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Heartbreaking: Introvert sentenced to 100 hours of hanging out.

72 shares on LinkedIn this month:

White Lotus is a cautionary tale about taking time off from work.

48 shares on Telegram this month:

I try to find the good in every situation. Wait, no – that was a typo. Food. I try to find the food in every situation.

21 shares on Reddit this month:

Don’t talk to me unless you are a ham sandwich.

28 shares on LinkedIn this month:

You don’t need to leave a message in a bottle. If the bottle is full of tequila, I’ll get the message.

27 shares on Slack this month:

I used to question authority, but now I question everything.

76 shares on Discord this month:

I suck at flirting. I be like “is that so?”

89 shares on Discord this month:

I never feel more alone than when I’m trying to put sunscreen on my back.

38 shares on Twitch this month:

Just saw a bird run across the street if you were wondering if anyone else is wasting their gifts.

81 shares on Instagram this month:

I’m not shy. I just don’t like you.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

24 folks are currently checking 👀

I just need my friends to know I would do absolutely anything for them, except reply to their message.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

There should be an Amazon driver at the Mall during the holidays so adults can sit on their lap and tell them what they want.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

I often choose gift bags instead of wrapping, not just out of laziness, but also because I have the fine motor skills of a drunken panda.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

An article of clothing left on the floor long enough becomes clean again because the germs eventually get bored and leave.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Was already at my breaking point, and then had to use the authenticator app.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

The biggest lesson employment has taught me is that efficient workers get punished with more work.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

If you want to complain about my driving at least calm down and get off my hood first.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m the person who requested weather reporters stand in the storms. I have no concept of wind or rain and love seeing needless suffering.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

My recliner and I go way back.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Why do men always think “looking for fun” means sex? Wat if I want us to draw?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,335

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇱 has downloaded:

Life is strange. We come into the world with nothing, then we struggle for everything, and finally, we leave with nothing.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has shared:

If rich people aren’t upset after an election, then we have failed.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has copied:

I got us matching straight jackets for Christmas.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has viewed:

Going ballistic. Anyone need anything?

Someone from 🇹🇬 has bookmarked:

If I were a bird, I know who I’d poop on.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has downloaded:

Santa baby, slip some mental stability under the tree, for me.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has bookmarked:

I want time to sit and read, take a nap and snack. Basically, I want to be in Kindergarten.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has downloaded:

Actually, this email could’ve been a meeting. We could’ve spent an hour on the clock talking shit and gossiping. Someone could’ve brought bagels.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has viewed:

Insane that you have to defend yourself at the end of the Ph. D.! Why are you attacking me? I’m so tired.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has viewed:

I want a man to love me so bad his entire family thinks I did witchcraft on him.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on TikTok:

You gotta act cool, calm, and collected around liquid eyeliner because it can sense your fear.

Spotted on WeChat:

Apparently, all my new nephew wants to do is eat and sleep, which means he’s already a lot like me.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

I love to see “pan-fried” on a menu. I hate food that’s fried in a shoe.

Broadcasted on Discord:

“Your password is too weak.” Just wait until you see my will to live.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

Don’t be alarmed at my semicolon usage; I’m a professional.

Just landed via X:

I am not “quiet quitting”, I am suffering from third-degree burnout.

Just shared via TikTok:

I wait all week for the weekend just to aggressively do nothing in five different outfits.

Live now on Messenger:

Lowkey wanna fall in love, but Monday to Friday is work, Saturday is laundry, Sunday is mental prep for Monday. The butterflies in my stomach are actually decomposing.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

French fries are like the lifeboats on the Titanic. They never give you enough.

Broadcasted on Twitch:

And for my next trick, I’m going to miss you in a million unspoken ways.

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