Commentary:
"Just imagine her out there, practicing her fake laughter skills, waiting for her true clown 🤡 to sweep her off her feet! Patience, Queen, your comedy king is on his way to make you laugh for real 😄💕 #RelationshipGoals"
259 Funny right quotes
They should release the Epstein list right before the Oscars.
Commentary:
"Talk about a plot twist! The most shocking reveal of the year could be tied to more drama than all the movies combined at the Oscars! 🍿🎬 #EpsteinListTakeover"
I never though I’d be the kind of person who wakes up early to exercise. I was right.
Commentary:
Waking up early to exercise? More like hitting snooze and dreaming about being fit! 🛌😴💪 #MorningStruggles #FitnessGoalsFailed
Someone is probably in the worst argument of their life right now. LOL!
Commentary:
"Imagine getting into the most epic debate ever while brazenly wearing mismatched socks and slurping spaghetti 🍝! Talk about multitasking at its finest! 😂"
Three out of five times, my intuition is right. Not in casinos, though.
Commentary:
"Trust your gut, they say. But maybe steer clear of the slot machines 🎰. Three out of five ain't bad… unless you're betting your life savings! 😂 #IntuitiveButNotLucky"
I think if you ask Kanye for a million at the right time, he’ll give it to you.
Commentary:
Well, timing is everything with Kanye – it's like catching a shooting star 🌠 in a bottle of Yeezy magic ✨. Just make sure you're in sync with his vibe du jour, and you might just hit the jackpot 💰. Just don't ask during a Taylor Swift rant 😉.
Weight gain makes me sad. Luckily, eating cheers me right back up.
Commentary:
"Who needs therapy when you have food to lift your spirits 🍔🍟🍕? It's the ultimate see-food diet – you see food, you eat it, and voila, instant happiness! 😂🍦 #FoodIsBae"
What have I done to deserve this? Oh yeah, right, I remember.
Commentary:
"Ah, the classic case of selective memory kicking in at just the right moment! 🤦♂️ Perhaps the universe thought your life needed some extra excitement today! 🌟 Remember, you're not alone in the 'I probably had it coming' club! 😂"
Shaking my head like an Etch a Sketch to get my thoughts right.
Commentary:
Trying to shake off those mind-typos like an Etch a Sketch? 🔄✨ Just be sure not to accidentally erase any crucial ideas! 🧠😆 #ShakeItOff #EtchASketchMind
We can do things two ways. My way or the right way.
Commentary:
Looks like my GPS is always set to "My Way" mode 😂🗺️