19 funny steal quotes - Wordgag

Sawing a hole in a table from underneath to steal a cake is a lot harder than cartoons would have you believe.

May 30, 2026

To steal from one is plagiarism, to steal from many is research.

May 30, 2026

Your phone is a casino designed to steal your time.

May 29, 2026

The thief who stole my iPhone could face time.

May 28, 2026

Why steal office supplies from work when you could take an extra-long bathroom break and steal company time instead?

May 27, 2026

They can steal your recipe, but the sauce won’t taste the same.

May 26, 2026

I want a pet eagle that’s trained to steal people’s sandwiches for me.

May 24, 2026

There are two types of people: Those who steal food off your plate and those who you keep in your life.

May 24, 2026

I tell my kids winning isn’t everything and then I steal money from the monopoly bank.

May 23, 2026

If you steal enough FitBits, they’ll just give you one for your ankle.

May 23, 2026

Honestly, I don’t think I have any more new passwords left in me. You wanna steal my identity? Go ahead, I hope you enjoy debt and terrible posture.

May 23, 2026

I’m going to break into your house and steal that thing with the little wheels on it under the plate in your microwave.

May 22, 2026

If someone steals your joke, you have to file a LOLsuit.

May 22, 2026

Stealing hoodies is for amateurs. Steal his car like a real woman.

May 21, 2026

An internship is only unpaid if you don’t steal enough.

May 21, 2026

I don’t carry my wallet to work because I’m afraid someone will steal it while I’m sleeping.

May 21, 2026

We could have high-speed rail that connects the entire country, but instead we get AI porn bots that steal all of our drinking water to entertain the dumbest people alive.

May 20, 2026

I love Queen and David Bowie, but why did they steal that riff from Vanilla Ice?

May 19, 2026

AI could never steal company time the way I do.

May 19, 2026