Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇷 has bookmarked:

I could easily win an Oscar, I just have other things going on right now.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has viewed:

Don’t let anyone ruin your day. Be a man. Ruin it yourself.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has shared:

I love all mythical creatures. Vampires, werewolves, unicorns, kids who listen.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has bookmarked:

They should invent a man who is being genuine when he says things to me.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has shared:

You ever have one of those days that require the use of both of your middle fingers?

Someone from 🇪🇸 has bookmarked:

Born to say “are you f*****g stupid”, forced to say “wow, I’ve never thought about it like that before”.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has viewed:

My cat runs a secret cult. I just pay the rent.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has downloaded:

We are all monsters searching for someone to share our lives with.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has shared:

Juggling screen time is the ultimate multitasking Olympics.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has shared:

Don’t think of it as losing followers, think of it as frustrating bots to the point they go away.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Jan 2, 2026

3,497

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on X:

Please do not test me. I’ve been saving up my rage like PTO.

Seen just now on YouTube:

Can’t. Too busy saving daylight.

Broadcasted on YouTube:

I forgot how to panic. Help!

Breaking via Snapchat:

Show me in the employee handbook where it says I can’t make weird noises in my cubicle.

Just shared via WeChat:

I was gonna kiss you under the blood moon eclipse, but whatever, bro.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

Requesting the Pink Panther theme song at karaoke and just standing on the stage motionless the entire time.

Trending via Discord:

They should invent friends whose schedules line up with yours.

Just shared via Discord:

The only way to my heart is with a knife.

Trending via Instagram:

Toothpaste sure knows how to ruin whatever you’re drinking.

Broadcasted on LinkedIn:

A baby cow is called a calf because it’s half a cow. Half cow. Calf. No further questions.

Funny work week quotes

Funny work week quotes bring a splash of humor to those Monday blues and Friday feels 🎉😂 Whether you’re stuck in meetings or dreaming of the weekend, these witty lines turn office chaos into laughs 🤪💼 Ready to brighten up your 9-to-5 grind? Let’s dive into some hilarious work week vibes that’ll have you smiling through the hustle! 😎✨

New funny work week quotes 👇

I don’t want to be dramatic, but the work week continuously restarting is literally ruining my life.

0

2 months ago

comedy, dramatic, frustration, humor, i, life, restart, restarting, routine, ruining, stress, want, week, work, work week
All these galaxies and planets, and we ended up on the one with 40 hour work weeks.

0

2 months ago

40, daily, daily life, galaxy, hour, humor, irony, life, planet, planets, satire, universe, week, weeks, work, work week
Having Christmas off in the middle of the work week and then forcing us to go back to work the next day feels so illegal.

0

2 months ago

back, back to work, Christmas, day, frustration, holiday, humor, illegal, off, time, time off, week, work, work week
I don’t wanna be dramatic but the work week continuously restarting is literally ruining my life.

0

2 months ago

drama, dramatic, humor, i, life, restarting, routine, ruining, week, work, work week
Adulting is realizing Monday is a better ‘off day’ than Friday.

0

2 months ago

adulting, better, day, Friday, humor, life, life realization, Monday, off day, realization, week, work, work week
Maybe if we all sit extremely still, Monday won’t be able to see us.

0

2 months ago

avoidance, humor, Monday, procrastination, still, stillness, week, work, work week

All funny work week quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

65 shares on TikTok this month:

Some hoodies don’t hoodie the way other hoodies hoodie.

43 shares on TikTok this month:

To anybody I hurt this year, I just wanna say you deserve it. Stop playing with me.

35 shares on X this month:

You get to a certain age and realize stretching is non-negotiable.

36 shares on Messenger this month:

Caffeine isn’t cutting it anymore. I need to eat a gun.

72 shares on Instagram this month:

Dear phone, if you didn’t light up so many times to tell me you had a low battery, you wouldn’t have died so quickly!

52 shares on Instagram this month:

Kinda rude that your reward for struggling through stuff is still dying at the end anyway.

62 shares on Discord this month:

Crazy how people can merge perfectly at McDonald’s, but not on the highway.

21 shares on Discord this month:

To me, essential oils are what drips out of tacos.

78 shares on Facebook this month:

When I was a kid, they played lame music for middle-aged people in the supermarket, but this morning at Whole Foods, it’s now all amazing bangers from my youth.

97 shares on Reddit this month:

You know you’re old when you you barely do anything all day, but still need a nap to continue doing barely anything.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Oh, I have Christmas spirit. The question is: Do I mix it with coke or do I drink it neat?

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Mothers be doing unnecessary housework and then get mad at you when they’re tired.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Festival is when you pay a fortune to live like a homeless person.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Whoever came up with a 30 minute lunch break needs a 30 minute beating.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s messed up that there are a million songs about love, but zero about hopping on a quick call with key stakeholders.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Seems like paleontologists always have a bone to pick.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Never vacuuming so I don’t disrupt my carpet’s natural micro biome.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

One day you’re young and fun and the next you’re searching “Thanksgiving recipes that won’t cause heartburn.”

11 folks are currently checking 👀

I named my wifi “The Promised LAN” because it always connects, but occasionally leaves you wandering in the desert looking for a better signal.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

I lied, there’s no sex. I just needed help getting out of my skinny jeans.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,432

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇩 has copied:

Life is pleasant. Death is peaceful. It’s the transition that’s troublesome.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has downloaded:

Lie during your job interview because they’re lying to you about their great work environment.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has copied:

The algorithm knows about that thing you like that you’re denying yourself of.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has copied:

Starting the second half of your sandwich is like “hell yeah, baby, let’s run it back!”

Someone from 🇺🇾 has bookmarked:

If I ever go missing, check the snack aisle. I’m probably just deciding.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has downloaded:

iPad PR is so crazy because you think you absolutely need one until you get it.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has copied:

What’s my net worth? Buddy, I don’t own a net.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has shared:

Sorry, I’m late. I got caught up at home being happy.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has downloaded:

So much anger in this small little body. I feel like a chihuahua.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has downloaded:

One of the toughest jobs in parenting is serving the inevitable eviction notice on your kid’s pillow fort.

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on Snapchat:

When gearing up for a mountain climbing adventure it is important to remember to no.

Going bananas on LinkedIn:

Daylight savings is not enough. You need to be daylight investing.

Just shared via Facebook:

The good old days, when you didn’t have to charge your watch and it didn’t constantly remind you how fat you were.

Making waves on WeChat:

Wait. We’re now turning plants into burgers? Haven’t cows been doing that like, forever.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

Babe, are you OK? You’ve barely touched your unread books.

Shared recently on Messenger:

The recipe I’m making specifically says allow to cook undisturbed, and yet my whole family is standing in the kitchen.

Shared recently on Instagram:

Girl, are you an Uber driver? Because you are driving me to drink.

Making waves on Slack:

They should invent health insurance that insures your health.

Spotted on Pinterest:

I don’t get mad anymore. I’m just like “again?” Ok then.

Freshly posted on Slack:

Welcome to your 40s: you’re not exhausted, that’s just your face now.

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