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Someone from 🇧🇸 has downloaded:

Aura farming in front of old people by not listening to music nor checking my phone.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has copied:

Love to come home after a long day’s work and relax with one thousand short-form videos.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has copied:

I’m looking forward to tomorrow. It’ll be much like today, but different enough to confuse me.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has downloaded:

God: “I used to work in mysterious ways but now I’m unemployed.”

Someone from 🇵🇬 has viewed:

If you’re riding a bike in New York City, it means you care about your health. Riding one in Tennessee means you got a DUI.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has bookmarked:

I love Fleetwood Mac, but “thunder only happens when it’s raining” is just not true.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has shared:

The sexual tension when everyone arrives at a 4-way stop at the same time.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has downloaded:

Without the words ‘literally’ and ‘like,’ I am nothing.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has bookmarked:

Source??? Pattern recognition.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has viewed:

When I tell my kids I’ll do something in a minute, what I’m really saying is “Please forget.”

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

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17,766

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15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

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3,264

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via YouTube:

At the strip club sighing until one of the dancers asks me what’s wrong.

Broadcasted on Telegram:

Is it possible to die of horniness? Asking for a friend.

Trending via Facebook:

After a month away and enough pasta to scare an Italian grandma, I can confirm: too much Parmesan? Never heard of her.

Spotted on TikTok:

I’m like Pooh Bear. I just want to eat, hang with my homies, and go around pantsless.

Seen just now on Slack:

I’d pretend to care about football for you.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

If you want to experience hunger, go and live with a wealthy person or family.

Spotted on Facebook:

Adult life sucks. Friends don’t even ask to see how fast you can run in your new shoes anymore.

Breaking via X:

My favorite Slipknot member is the one who wears the mask.

Making waves on Snapchat:

I’m giving up eating chocolate for a month. Sorry, bad punctuation. I’m giving up. Eating chocolate for a month.

Broadcasted on WeChat:

Do you think working at Pizza Hut would help you get a job at Sunglass Hut? You know, with all that hut experience?

We should be able to go to the bar and drink to watch Love Island, like men do with sports.

1 week ago

Funny Quotes

Witty quote about enjoying drinks and watching Love Island like a sports fan.

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Commentary:
Why support a favorite team when you can support a favorite couple? 🍸🏝️ #LoveGoals

able, activity, bar, drink, gender, gender role, humor, island, love, Love Island, men, party, role, should, show, social, social activity, sport, sports, television, television show, watch, watching, watching party

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Social Media Stars ⭐

28 shares on TikTok this month:

I have some fart jokes I’ve been holding in.

47 shares on TikTok this month:

“I’m depressed because there’s not enough cheese in this world to satisfy my hunger for it.”

85 shares on WeChat this month:

I’m not asking for a lot, I just want someone down to earth that’s gonna touch me all over like my shower curtain does.

75 shares on LinkedIn this month:

There needs to be a separate grocery store for people who actually know what they’re doing.

24 shares on Discord this month:

Why is judge the only job where you can bang a little hammer to make people shut up? I’ve needed that in literally every job I’ve had.

94 shares on Facebook this month:

Sorry, I ghosted you. I liked you too much.

26 shares on Snapchat this month:

The people who upload old movies to the internet are holding society together.

72 shares on Discord this month:

If I were you, I would rather be me.

34 shares on Slack this month:

Everything is dishwasher safe if you don’t care enough about it.

67 shares on WeChat this month:

My favorite thing to do at the gym is stay home and eat a piece of cake.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇻 has copied:

It’s time for basic human empathy to make a comeback.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has shared:

I wish we were cats so you could just randomly slap co-workers for no reason.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has copied:

I love traveling because I love to check if I have my passport every 3-4 minutes.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has downloaded:

Hey, we’re calling off the search party. We found a different guy out there we like more.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has shared:

There should be a zoo that has people from every country in it.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has viewed:

Please do not test me. I’ve been saving up my rage like PTO.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has copied:

Things were better when the computer lived in its own specific room, and you only went in there sometimes.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has viewed:

The human brain is great. It works from the second you are born and stops as soon as you start liking someone.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has copied:

We’re all just a bunch of addicts, struggling with our drug of choice.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has shared:

They’re putting me through the penny flattening machine at the zoo.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via X:

I nearly broke my toe because the coffee table didn’t look where it was going.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

How much longer do we have to keep pretending that Pilates isn’t a sex thing?

Shared recently on Pinterest:

The best time to start a family fight is now. It gets you out of buying relatives gifts.

Live now on TikTok:

At what age do I delete Snapchat?

Freshly posted on Telegram:

$20k in my bank account. – The k is silent.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

Y’all be riding them bikes in the street like I don’t gotta look up my next song.

Going viral on Reddit:

It’s healthy to be a little insane sometimes.

Just shared via TikTok:

Better to be a wolf that everyone hates, than a donkey that everyone rides.

Just shared via Telegram:

Brain, I know you’re trying hard, but you are not doing a good job.

Going viral on Twitch:

Limbo is the only sport where being really bad at it means you’re raising the bar.

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Activity Log ✨

We should be able to go to the bar and drink to watch Love Island, like men do with sports.

I’m scared to go to an art museum, because what if they decide to keep me?

According to “The Hobbit”, Gollum was once a handsome young man who was robbed of his youth, zest for life and energy by putting on a ring. Men, think about it!

Social Media Stars ⭐

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Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

We should be able to go to the bar and drink to watch Love Island, like men do with sports.

Keep the laugh going 😂

I’m scared to go to an art museum, because what if they decide to keep me?

Unfollowing high school people really is a form of self-care.

The next time someone texts me “we need to talk,” I’ll reply, “Yes, we really need to talk,” so that I won’t be the only one stressing.

According to “The Hobbit”, Gollum was once a handsome young man who was robbed of his youth, zest for life and energy by putting on a ring. Men, think about it!

There should be a socially acceptable way to say, “I’m not sure what to say to that. Can you please say something different?”.

It’s almost impossible to talk to a girl without flirting with her.

Social Media Stars ⭐

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