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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇮 has copied:

I put the hot in psychotic.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has viewed:

Therapy is basically me saying, “I did a thing,” and my therapist saying, “Yay, good job!”

Someone from 🇲🇲 has copied:

If you get cremated after you die, you can be put into an hourglass and still participate in family game nights.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has shared:

I do all my own stunts, but never intentionally.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has bookmarked:

All I’m saying is that I’m closer to being a millionaire than Jeff Bezos is.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has viewed:

I know you miss me. The tarot lady on TikTok just told me.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has bookmarked:

Thank God they have medical marijuana in this state. I need it for my joints.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has shared:

Revenge has no expiry date. I will deal with you when I’m ready.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has bookmarked:

Sometimes I think about starting a podcast and then I remember all I do during conversations is nod.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has shared:

Having siblings is so important because you learn the exact amount you can annoy someone before they try to physically kill you.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,300

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via YouTube:

Sorry I’m late. Had to scroll back to my birth year.

Spotted on Instagram:

Every girl’s personal hell is being too excited about their birthday and it ends up being the worst day ever.

Shared recently on TikTok:

People say I act like I don’t care. It’s not an act.

Live now on Telegram:

Why do humans need jobs? Why can’t I just exist and make art and chill with my cat?

Going viral on Pinterest:

Sorry, I’m late. I was pumping up the jam.

Trending via YouTube:

People out here living double lives, and I’m barely even holding a single life together.

Just shared via Snapchat:

I will be posting telepathically on all social media today. So if you think of something funny, that was me.

Just shared via WeChat:

Find someone who cares about you as much as Gmail cares about new devices signing into your account.

Breaking via Snapchat:

Kinda miss when crushes were butterflies instead of complex emotional calculations about compatibility and red flags.

Spotted on TikTok:

Life is too short, and death is too long.

Funny casual dining quotes

Funny casual dining quotes bring a sprinkle of humor to your mealtime moments 🍔😂 Whether you’re sharing laughs over burgers, pizza, or a cozy family dinner, these witty lines add flavor to every bite 🍕😄 Get ready to serve up smiles and giggles with the perfect blend of food and fun—because dining should always be deliciously entertaining! 🍽️🎉

New funny casual dining quotes 👇

All funny casual dining quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections
✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

76 shares on Threads this month:

Whenever someone tells me how well behaved my kids are, I say it’s cause they’re not at home.

64 shares on Snapchat this month:

My doctor told me to try a milk bath. Adding the Cinnamon Toast Crunch was my idea.

39 shares on Telegram this month:

I wish people had mute buttons in real life.

99 shares on Discord this month:

The most embarrassing thing in the world is when you make a fool of yourself in front of a baby and it doesn’t laugh.

42 shares on Slack this month:

I miss when you could touch a TV and feel its fur.

65 shares on YouTube this month:

I can’t believe I was arrested for impersonating a politician. I was just sitting there doing nothing.

24 shares on LinkedIn this month:

The Gen Z stare. The millennial pause. Instead, let’s talk about the boomer inappropriate personal question.

66 shares on Discord this month:

My my husband’s favorite thing is when I blame him for losing something that’s actually in my hand.

42 shares on Reddit this month:

The great thing about having a mouse in your house is that I’m sure it’s just the one mouse, probably.

70 shares on Threads this month:

It’s important to set an alarm the first day of school, so you remember to pick up the kids.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Started the year single. Ending the year single. Consistency is key.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Channeling my inner pretzel to achieve expert-level bad posture.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

If you need time alone, just announce that you need help cleaning the cats litter box.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

If you can’t say anything nice, say something funny.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

“Seize the day!” No thank you. I will leave the day alone and hope it extends me the same courtesy.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Apple’s secret growth engine: vibe coders paying the $99 Apple Developer Program fee.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Half of Twitter is horny, half is depressed, and the other half don’t know how to do math.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

I have the body of a god. Sadly, it’s Buddha after brunch.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

When I am calculating any risk, I think to myself: is this first cat life behavior? Or ninth cat life behavior?

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Everyone is fighting a battle you don’t know about, except for me. I am complaining loudly about my battle. Everybody knows about it.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,439

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇻 has viewed:

This cucumber Gatorade got me quenched in an unprecedented manner.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has copied:

I don’t wanna be dramatic but the work week continuously restarting is literally ruining my life.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has bookmarked:

Good morning, townsfolk. I’m here to slay the monsters.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has copied:

They should list at least one alien “as himself” in the Star Wars credits.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has viewed:

I had 99 problems but getting divorced solved 98 of them.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has viewed:

Out of sheer boredom, I opened the front door and rang the doorbell. I was so happy.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has copied:

Some people peak in high school. I peaked when I realized I never had to see them again.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has bookmarked:

Women are like a fitted sheet. No matter what you do or how hard you try, they just never seem to cooperate.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has bookmarked:

I could easily win an Oscar, I just have other things going on right now.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has bookmarked:

Don’t rub your happiness in people’s faces this Valentine’s Day. Let the couples enjoy themselves for once.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

Maybe I died of Covid in 2020, and this is hell.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

I bet before the band got popular, Barenaked Ladies concerts had a lot of pissed off attendees.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

I was brought up in the wild by hyenas. Times were hard, food was scarce but we had some great laughs.

Making waves on Twitch:

We are the last generation of programmers who know the deadly feeling of seeing the exact problem in our code, on Stack Overflow, with 0 answers.

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

How old were you when you found out people in porn aren’t actually in love?

Trending via Messenger:

I can show you the stars, we just have to stand up really fast.

Going viral on Facebook:

They should invent a word for when you’re alive but not really living.

Shared recently on WeChat:

This is my phone. I text back when I want to.

Seen just now on WeChat:

My bit for Thanksgiving is going to be constantly bringing up politics, but pronouncing every politician’s name slightly incorrectly.

Shared recently on Telegram:

Welcome to your 40’s: you get excited about avocados now.

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