Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇸 has downloaded:

I heard time is money, so I quit my job. Now I have lots of time!

Someone from 🇹🇻 has copied:

I don’t know much, but I know this: the older you get, the faster the number of things you’re willing to wait in line for approaches zero.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has downloaded:

Welcome to your parents’ house, where the wifi password is fEtbqP2LVp3U6Hkh

Someone from 🇱🇦 has bookmarked:

I wish tree puns were more poplar.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has viewed:

Just let your girlfriend be crazy, like who cares, bro.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has downloaded:

(Making small talk with a couple) So have you guys ever cheated on each other?

Someone from 🇱🇨 has downloaded:

Keep your friend’s toast and your enemy’s toaster.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has viewed:

Welcome to your 40’s: you have big plans tonight. No, you don’t.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has bookmarked:

Need a dimly lit cocktail date with a gaze so lustful it causes God to draft up another sin.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has bookmarked:

Sorry for acting weird. It’s just that I mirror people, and you were being weird first.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,476

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Telegram:

I passed my genetic engineering exam with flying koalas.

Spotted on Slack:

I run a parody bank account.

Spotted on Telegram:

Only bots from Nigeria are allowed to call me dear.

Seen just now on Reddit:

Sometimes the voices in my head get bullied by the voices in my stomach.

Trending via Snapchat:

If you’re feeling lonely, start a small business. Then you’ll have a little company.

Broadcasted on LinkedIn:

Shy with a mean resting face is a crazy combo.

Trending via WeChat:

How many filters does it take before it’s technically a painting?

Just shared via Discord:

It’s okay to run away from the cops if you’re shy.

Live now on Telegram:

Sometimes, I feel like I need love, but the moment I finish eating, I realize I was just hungry.

Live now on Telegram:

Getting excited to go to bed is a different level of adulting.

Funny celestial quotes

Funny celestial quotes 🌟 bring a cosmic twist to your day, blending stars, planets, and moons with a sprinkle of humor 😂. Whether you’re an astronomy nerd 🪐 or just love a good laugh under the night sky 🌙, these witty sayings are sure to brighten your mood and launch your imagination into orbit 🚀. Get ready to giggle among the galaxies!

New funny celestial quotes 👇

All funny celestial quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

21 shares on YouTube this month:

This is the dumbest apocalypse ever.

71 shares on Twitch this month:

Welcome to your 40s: it’s Saturday night so you know what that means, absolutely nothing, go to bed.

57 shares on Snapchat this month:

Chuck Norris can rub two fires together to get a piece of wood.

37 shares on Slack this month:

I’d like to meet the person who decided that if you wanted to get married fast, it had to be done by Elvis.

56 shares on X this month:

My boyfriend talks to everyone while I stand by quietly, planning my escape.

58 shares on Twitch this month:

Girl math is deactivating social media accounts to avoid only one person.

60 shares on Reddit this month:

Be the elephant you wish to see in the room.

51 shares on Pinterest this month:

Isn’t it weird that we have one hand that knows how to do everything and then one hand that just sits there like ‘I don’t know how to hold a pencil.’

15 shares on Twitch this month:

The only running I do is to chase the ice cream truck.

70 shares on Instagram this month:

Expecting your first baby’s exciting, but have you ever ordered a new coffee machine?

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Elections make you feel like we’re all in divorce court waiting to see who gets custody of us.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Good news: I set an all time high today! Bad news: It’s my cholesterol.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Money will not leave you on read for 9 hours.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

The week before your period doesn’t make any sense… until you realize it’s the week before your period.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m addicted to following the rules I made up. And also breaking the rules I made up.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

I’ve already sent Santa a short letter this week to say hello. Not that he thinks I only get in touch if I want something.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Do you want to sit on the porch with me until we die or not?

14 folks are currently checking 👀

That pile of clothes on my bed, seems to have strange powers and gets higher on its own.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

I admire how, when babies don’t want to hold something anymore, they just drop it.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

90% of debugging is just realizing your own stupidity in slow motion.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,334

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇰 has copied:

Gonna start using “with all dude respect”.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has viewed:

The theory that two stacked beds can’t be converted into two regular beds has been debunked.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has viewed:

If someone texts “Do you have a minute,” it’s a trick. Don’t fall for it.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has shared:

If you’re ever intimidated by someone just imagine them opening a Capri Sun.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has viewed:

If you have gray in your beard, you can hit it.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has shared:

To be fair, a dumpster is like one of the safest places to have a fire.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has copied:

I have a great poker face because I have no idea what’s going on.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has downloaded:

Why is experimental noise music always scary metallic noises and never fun sounds like people clapping and laughing and like bubbles and stuff?

Someone from 🇵🇼 has copied:

I still can’t believe they named a company GoDaddy.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has shared:

I’m not fragile like a flower. I’m fragile like a bomb.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Threads:

Not to brag, but I don’t need alcohol to send texts I’ll regret.

Freshly posted on Slack:

Thank god I played a lot of Tetris as a kid or I never would have been able to get everything into the freezer.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Panda bears are proof that it’s okay to be kind of an idiot as long as you’re super adorable.

Shared recently on WeChat:

“You’re so funny!” Thanks, I didn’t get laid in high school.

Spotted on Pinterest:

Sleep well, middle finger—you’ve got a big day ahead of you tomorrow.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

Remember that even the worst haircut will eventually grow on you.

Trending via Twitch:

Please don’t leave me to my own devices. They’re all out of batteries.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

In the future, there will be grandmas who can’t bake but have tattoos on their backs.

Going viral on Threads:

Ouija boards are like unannounced phone calls for ghosts.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

He was clicking his pen 137 times a minute, Your Honor.

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Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴