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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇴🇲 has viewed:

I like smoke and lightning, your honor, heavy metal thunder, racing with the wind. You know that feeling I am under.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has copied:

It’s so cold that men who wear shorts outside in the winter are wearing TWO pairs of shorts.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has shared:

If I’m ever murdered, I don’t want two women with a podcast solving the case in their spare time.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has downloaded:

The sexual tension between me and a late afternoon coffee to get me through the workday.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has downloaded:

I see people my age out there climbing mountains and skydiving, and here I am feeling good about myself because I got my leg through my underwear without losing my balance.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has copied:

The good news: once you get a PhD, friends and family will refer to you as doctor. The bad news: They will only do it when you’re wrong.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has viewed:

My favorite yoga pose is the one where you eat a sandwich.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has downloaded:

Every day is a D-Day, if you’re a stutterer.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has downloaded:

I need one of those jobs they have in sitcoms, where it pays my rent but interferes with exactly zero of my social plans or situations.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has downloaded:

No more bare minimum, I want the moon and the stars. Maybe even a planet at this point.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Feb 3, 2026

3,529

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on X:

I am not living la vida loca. I am loca because of la vida.

Spotted on Slack:

Alcohol: When you want to run away from your problems without moving.

Shared recently on Discord:

Garlic bread is my therapist now.

Just landed via Telegram:

Wearing shorts and my pale legs screamed at the sensation of sunlight like vampires.

Spotted on Snapchat:

Every time someone tries to fight with me online, a middle finger gets its wings.

Shared recently on Facebook:

Updating my resume. Anyone got a more professional word for “dumpster fire”?

Spotted on LinkedIn:

Beavers are so funny. Why are you a little rat doing hydraulic engineering?

Just landed via Instagram:

In search of someone who loves me as much as I love my snooze button.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

Oh, sorry, I can’t right now. I’m imagining some things and worrying about them.

Going viral on Instagram:

Don’t worry, bro. She’s probably just working on a puzzle right now. She’ll get back to you.

Funny electrician quotes

Funny electrician quotes spark a bright ⚡️ and hilarious 😄 buzz that every spark lover will appreciate! Whether you’re wired 🔌 for laughs or just love clever puns about volts and circuits, these zingers will light up your day 🔥. Perfect for electricians, DIY enthusiasts, or anyone who enjoys a shocking sense of humor! Get ready to amp up your smile with some electrifying wit ⚡️😂!

New funny electrician quotes 👇

All I’m saying is that porn gives us an unrealistic expectation of how quickly the electrician shows up.

2 days ago

delay, electrician, expectation, humor, porn, saying, service, service delay, shows, time, unrealistic, us, waiting, waiting time
Got electrocuted while fixing the doorbell, and now I can hear my girlfriend’s thoughts. She’s thinking she should have called an electrician.

3 days ago

consequence, domestic, domestic life, doorbell, electrician, electrocution, fixing, got, hear, hearing, hearing thoughts, humor, i, life, mishap, relationship, should, thinking, thoughts, unexpected, unexpected consequence, while
Don’t understand why electricians aren’t called power rangers, but okay.

2 weeks ago

electrician, funny observation, humor, joke, observation, okay, power, power ranger, profession, ranger, understand, wordplay

All funny electrician quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

62 shares on Messenger this month:

Why would I finish my thought when I could have a new, more exciting one?

85 shares on Reddit this month:

When I die, I want to go peacefully like my grandfather did, in his sleep, not screaming, like the passengers in his car.

63 shares on Snapchat this month:

Going to IKEA if anyone needs some meatballs.

71 shares on WhatsApp this month:

A funny thing about the Heimlich Maneuver is that it’s impossible to pronounce if you’re choking.

88 shares on Discord this month:

Taking a guy from skinny jeans to linen trousers, that’s my way of giving back to society.

59 shares on Messenger this month:

Yesterday, my boss asked me what I did for a living.

100 shares on X this month:

When someone yells stop I don’t know whether it’s in the name of love, it’s Hammer time, or I should smell the flowers.

48 shares on Telegram this month:

It’s cute when kids say what they want to be when they grow up. You’re gonna write emails on the computer, buddy.

53 shares on Telegram this month:

We’d never met, or even spoken, but I could tell just from gazing into her pale blue eyes I had stepped on her toe.

21 shares on Facebook this month:

If you knock down a policeman, they’ll get backup.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

8 folks are currently checking 👀

If I ever find out who stole my identity, I’ll pay all their debts and ruin their credit score just for fun.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Another fine day ruined by waking up.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

The female rage of having so much to say but refusing to say it, cause their emotional intelligence is too low for them to comprehend it.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Tupperware is a fun way to store your leftovers until you throw them away.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Is this art or trash?

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Asking people their favorite color and then calling them liars.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Gonna go walk the beach and stare annoyingly at couples. May even growl as I pass by.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

My sister: snowboards. My brother: skateboards. Me: charcuterie boards.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

My New Year’s resolution is to be less presumptuous and rude to others. I’ll bet yours is to lose weight, isn’t it?

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Are there any medium rappers? They’re always Big or Lil.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,482

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇳 has copied:

The urge to say “yeah, you should do that”, especially when you have no clue.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has shared:

The amount of inappropriate thoughts I have is a little concerning.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has downloaded:

(Talking to myself) I just don’t know what to tell you.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has downloaded:

If I had my Pinterest wardrobe, I would be unstoppable.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has downloaded:

“You’re so quiet!” Thanks! I actually tried to speak twice but you kept talking over me.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has shared:

There’s someone in our team who behaves horribly to me and whenever I have to type his name, I’ve taken to using a slightly smaller font size than for everyone else’s.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has viewed:

Haircuts should be covered by insurance.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has downloaded:

Nobody bools anymore. In high school, everyone was booling.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has shared:

My dog just tracked and successfully located a folium lanceolatum, more commonly known as a leaf.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has viewed:

I love befriending yappers. They bring the yapping out of me. Then we yap together. Yapping is so much fun.

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Snapchat:

If a zombie and vampire bite each other, who turns who?

Just shared via TikTok:

All billionaires must submit a list of five things they did for society in the last week or their wealth shall be confiscated.

Just shared via Facebook:

Parent hack: Shut your child’s bedroom door to make your house cleaner.

Shared recently on Slack:

Why aren’t we using these t-shirt cannons for burritos?

Making waves on WeChat:

I would pay extra for a dental hygienist who was comfortable with silence.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

When people give me directions and they’re like “you can’t miss it,” I’m like, “Oh, you do not know what I’m capable of.”

Making waves on Discord:

May her tire get flat with a dude who can’t change it.

Just landed via WeChat:

“I asked Grok.” “I asked ChatGPT.” Well, I’ve sacrificed a sheep.

Just landed via Facebook:

Show me in the employee handbook where it says I can’t make weird noises in my cubicle.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Deleting my mental health to focus on social media.

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