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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇯 has bookmarked:

I have no idea how dishwasher tablets work. I’ve already taken five of them, and I still don’t feel like doing the dishes!

Someone from 🇱🇦 has copied:

I think something’s missing in my life… Like… 2-3 million dollars.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has downloaded:

I’m getting to the age where it’s rude to pull out a bottle of ibuprofen if I don’t have enough for everyone.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has viewed:

They’re releasing another “Jurassic” movie. Let me guess: The dinosaurs get loose.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has shared:

What an embarrassing time to be alive.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has bookmarked:

Cafeteria is a beautiful name for a baby girl.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has bookmarked:

When younger I would walk up to the counter and the bartender would know me by name. Now it’s my pharmacist.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has copied:

No LinkedIn, I am not “open to work,” I am required to work.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has copied:

Mocktails are awesome because they ask the question ‘how much could juice cost?’

Someone from 🇺🇦 has shared:

What we need is more companies making hot sauce. I need 900 more ways to taste a thing that tastes exactly like all the other ones.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2266 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,428

Funny Quotes Topics

15,132

Funny Quotes Images

12,428

58 minutes ago

3,432

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Discord:

I don’t even know what the Transformers are fighting about, to be honest.

Trending via Reddit:

I never met a problem I couldn’t make worse.

Live now on Telegram:

There’s a cougar warning in my neighborhood, but apparently it’s just a big cat. I bought a case of wine coolers for nothing.

Spotted on Discord:

Self-esteem’s so bad my fantasies are hurting my feelings.

Just shared via Discord:

I want to be cremated so that I will get a smoking-hot body again.

Going viral on Twitch:

I want to have a penguin that just waddles up to me whenever I’m sad.

Spreading quickly via X:

Who called them cat allergies and not meowlergies?

Just landed via Reddit:

I’m sick of the Microsoft Authenticator. Like, who would be logging in to do my work?

Just landed via LinkedIn:

“I’m still young”, I tell myself, as my knees make popping noises while standing up.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

Actually, men should take the pill. It makes more sense to unload the gun than to shoot at a bulletproof vest.

Home » Funny Epidemic Quotes

Funny epidemic quotes

Funny epidemic quotes 😂💉 bring some much-needed laughter during serious times! When life hands you masks and hand sanitizer, a little humor goes a long way 😷✨. Ready to chuckle through the chaos and find the bright side of social distancing? Let’s dive into the funniest takes on epidemics that’ll have you laughing while staying safe! 😄🦠

New funny epidemic quotes 👇

3 months ago
Share →: There’s an epidemic of people just staring at their phones in their parked cars.

Commentary:
Looks like we've got a new public health crisis: "Car-itis"—the mysterious urge to park and peer into that glowing screen! 🚗📱 Maybe they're just trying to see if their cars have feelings too, or auditioning for the next "Fast & Furious: Smartphone Edition." 😂 Who knew parked cars could be the hottest new social hotspots? Remember, folks: your phone can wait—your car might need a break too! 🚙✨
5 months ago
Share →: “Male loneliness epidemic” and it’s just karma and the consequences of their actions.

Commentary:
Well, it seems like the "male loneliness epidemic" is here to remind everyone that what goes around comes around! 🤷‍♂️ Maybe they should have thought twice before ghosting, huh? Looks like Karma's got a great sense of humor too! 😂 #LonelyButNotAlone
Jan 22, 2025
Share →: Proudly doing my part to cause the male loneliness epidemic.

Commentary:
"Ah, a true unsung hero in the battle against male loneliness! 🦸‍♀️ Keep up the good work, your efforts are not going unnoticed… by anyone! 🤣 #LonelyHeartsClub"

For even more funny epidemic quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny epidemic quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2266 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,428

Funny Quotes Topics

15,132

Funny Quotes Images

12,428

58 minutes ago

3,449

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇶🇦 has shared:

Why don’t straight men and lesbians hang out like straight women and gays do?

Someone from 🇾🇪 has downloaded:

Babysitting a pair of twin babies right now and feeding them saying “here comes the airplane”. I don’t know, just feels weird.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has copied:

You should be allowed to speed if good music is playing.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has bookmarked:

Girl who is still crazy: I was crazy back then.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has viewed:

Jesus, I need money to organize your birthday.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has copied:

I read that Miley Cyrus will be starring in a remake of Silence of the Lambs. She’ll be playing Hannibal Montannibal.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has bookmarked:

Remember, you don’t have to worry about being around annoying people in public if you never leave the house.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has downloaded:

What doesn’t kill you makes you weird at social gatherings.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has downloaded:

Life is like a helicopter. I don’t know how to operate a helicopter.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has copied:

King-sized beds: Because you both want to sleep on the same mattress, but not in the same zip code.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

Started from the bottom, now we a little bit above the bottom.

Just shared via X:

When gearing up for a mountain climbing adventure it is important to remember to no.

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

Don’t rush into a relationship. Be friends first. Maybe they have hotter friends. Thank me later.

Going viral on Snapchat:

Jan 1st: Avocado on whole grain toast with a protein shake. Jan 20th: Syrup comes from a tree so technically it’s a vegetable.

Just shared via YouTube:

I know I just ate a snack, but I could really use a snack.

Shared recently on Discord:

Remember, for some unknown reason Santa doesn’t make batteries.

Broadcasted on Threads:

It’s Friday. I ran out of small talk on Tuesday. Please leave me alone.

Just shared via Telegram:

If I could be in two places at once, I’d be in bed twice.

Just shared via Snapchat:

I unload the dishwasher backwards… just to feel something.

Spotted on Discord:

Technically mixed martial arts can include tickle fighting.

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