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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇰 has shared:

Sorry, I can’t come. I’m still recovering from the last time I went out.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has copied:

Sorry I missed your call, I was staring in horror at the screen, wondering why on earth you couldn’t just text me.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has bookmarked:

Life is just a series of Sopranos references with some other things mixed in.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has bookmarked:

He’s an everything bagel… I’m just a nothing burger…

Someone from 🇹🇭 has bookmarked:

Maybe if we paid our streaming services even more, they could stop jacking up the volume on the commercials they make us watch, even though we are paying for the service.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has shared:

Saw a guy reading a book and writing notes in it. Not enough words in there for ya, bud?

Someone from 🇰🇷 has viewed:

Putting mental health before my education is a good idea until it affects my education, which affects my mental health, which affects my education.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has bookmarked:

Noam Chomsky is a crazy name, like you sound hungry as f***.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has copied:

Sailors wish they could swear like me.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has bookmarked:

My favorite kind of gender reveal is the one where the parents find out, and they just tell everyone through text instead of making me go to a party.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,286

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

I don’t have a five-year plan because every two years I realize I need a different life.

Spotted on Pinterest:

Can anyone recommend some basic intrusive thoughts for someone looking to get into anxiety?

Broadcasted on Facebook:

Roses are red. Bumble bees buzz. This rhyme doesn’t rhyme. No, wait, yes it does.

Going bananas on Telegram:

It’s like ten thousand spoons when all you need is a Like.

Making waves on Messenger:

Fitness influencer: It’s important to listen to your body. Body: You’re old. And you want lasagna.

Going viral on X:

I love all the Winter Olympic events, sliding downhill on a piece of wood, sliding downhill on two pieces of wood, sliding downhill in a piece of wood. All amazing.

Just landed via Telegram:

I have thought one billion times about everything.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

A little mystery is the sweetest seduction.

Breaking via TikTok:

Pets can’t talk but everyone loves them. This is not a coincidence.

Spotted on TikTok:

Feminism convinced women they could have it all. Now they’re 40, independent, and crying in a very nice but empty apartment.

Funny foreplay quotes

Funny foreplay quotes are the perfect way to spice up your love life with a dash of humor and🔥flirtation! Whether you’re looking to break the ice or keep things light and cheeky😉, these witty lines bring laughs and passion together. Get ready to giggle, blush, and turn up the heat—because foreplay doesn’t have to be serious to be seriously fun! 💋💕

New funny foreplay quotes 👇

All funny foreplay quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

23 shares on Telegram this month:

There’s literally no law that says you can’t put your friends down as your references and pretend they were your boss at an old job. Literally, there’s no law that says that.

58 shares on Telegram this month:

Netflix will help you finish spelling the name of the movie you’re looking for, and then tell you they don’t have it.

55 shares on Facebook this month:

I think I’ll spend my savings on a lifetime supply of pasta. Worth every penne.

98 shares on X this month:

I don’t care about life on other planets. I don’t even have a life on this one.

68 shares on Reddit this month:

At the club asking for Ibuprofen.

43 shares on WeChat this month:

The price of groceries has gotten me thinking about what acorns taste like.

87 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I’ve reached the age where my train of thought often leaves the station without me.

45 shares on Snapchat this month:

You can never really “own” earbuds. You just have to appreciate the time you had together.

21 shares on Threads this month:

A thousand curses upon anyone who has ever gone, “Why are you sitting in the dark?” and then flipped the light on without asking.

65 shares on YouTube this month:

One of the most embarrassing things in the world: walking downhill.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

7 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m so grateful when people tell me to drive safe, cause then I remember not to drive off that cliff.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Tattoos: because being an adult is hard, and I deserve to have stickers.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

I wonder how many different vegetables they exploded before they discovered popcorn.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

“Do you have any hobbies?” Lately, I’ve been really into panicking.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

The secret to being a private person is to overshare dumb shit so people think you are an open book but then not tell them any of the important details of your life.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

All the smart people at the office are worried about being replaced by A.I., but not me. I’m safe until they invent Artificial Stupidity.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Killing with kindness is a murder by compliments.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Adulting is making a phone call, even though you don’t want to.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m really hoping money falls from the sky this week, or else I’m doomed.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

You are the Monday of my life.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,395

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇹 has downloaded:

I hate overhead lighting – trying to mimic the holy sun should be considered sinful. The lamp is much better, mimicking the hearths of our forebears.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has copied:

Good morning to everyone except the people who are missing the ability to read the room.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has viewed:

Everyone wants a drunk text until I’m doing it at noon.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has shared:

The great thing about playing the trombone is no one knows if you’re good at it or not.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has downloaded:

This is a horrible time in history to be a decent human being.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has bookmarked:

Self-discipline is tough because I’m the boss of me, and that guy runs a real loose ship.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has viewed:

I’ve never been cut in half by a magician, but I have worn jeans on Thanksgiving. Same thing.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has copied:

The hard part about dating is finding someone who’s mentally ill enough to understand you, but not mentally ill enough to ruin your life.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has viewed:

Please don’t leave me to my own devices. They’re all out of batteries.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has shared:

It’s not the destination that matters. It’s the snacks you eat on the way.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Discord:

My brain doesn’t sea typos until I’ve already hit send.

Trending via YouTube:

I watched a woman clean her whole house on YouTube today, in case you thought I lacked ambition.

Going viral on Snapchat:

My favourite animal is me when I have money.

Spotted on X:

Always remember, if you ever need me, I’m just several phone calls and unread texts away.

Going viral on X:

I ran out of toilet paper so I had to start using old newspapers. The Times are rough.

Just shared via Messenger:

I have a condition where if I don’t walk as fast as humanly possible wherever I go, I will die. I’m like the bus in Speed.

Seen just now on Instagram:

The biggest problem with working from home? I want to go home even though I’m already at home.

Shared recently on X:

Asked a German woman why Germany produced so many legendary physicists / mathematicians, and her response was basically, “Have you considered educating people who aren’t rich?”

Just landed via Telegram:

So, if you are too tired to speak, sit next to me, because I am fluent in silence.

Freshly posted on Threads:

Will mosquitoes ever develop a pizza obsession and end their pursuit of human blood?

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