Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇹 has copied:

Back in the day, you used to have to listen to records backwards to discover conspiracy theories.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has downloaded:

My plant is drunk, it’s growing in the wrong direction.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has shared:

There aren’t any emojis that really express any meaningful sort of anguish.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has bookmarked:

Have an early flight tomorrow, so naturally I’m going to stay up late tonight and be weird in my room.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has bookmarked:

When I watch hockey, I pretend they’re fighting over the last Oreo.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has downloaded:

I’m far too underqualified for adult life, and I feel like I was promoted to manager far too quickly.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has downloaded:

Blocking someone isn’t enough; I need their PornHub videos to always buffer, just as they’re about to climax.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has shared:

No matter how early you get up, fate always gets up half an hour earlier.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has viewed:

Shoutout to everyone who remembers their childhood landline number but can’t recall the password they made yesterday. You’re my people.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has viewed:

If I can’t wash dishes to your album, it ain’t that fire.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Jan 31, 2026

Users Online

3,548

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via LinkedIn:

The only thing I miss from my past is that flat stomach I had.

Going bananas on YouTube:

The me who snips coupons needs to communicate better with the me who walks into the stores.

Breaking via Instagram:

Is there a job where I can lay on the floor and listen to music?

Spreading quickly via Instagram:

And then there are those dates after which you think: “Have I really shaved my legs for this?”

Seen just now on YouTube:

Farts are just the ghosts of the things we eat.

Making waves on Pinterest:

Give yourself time to heal. A couple of decades should do it.

Trending via Facebook:

Guy inventing jogging: how can I suffer, but with music?

Trending via Messenger:

I could never commit gun violence. The only things I know how to reload are my pill caddy and the batteries for the remote.

Making waves on Twitch:

People who say that they don’t have time for my bullshit should wake up an hour earlier.

Spotted on Snapchat:

Don’t donate your plasma. It’s a big scam, and they’re just using it to make TVs.

Funny formal quotes

Funny formal quotes bring a cheeky twist to the world of etiquette and sophistication 🎩😄 Perfect for livening up speeches, invitations, or just your day, they blend class with a splash of humor 🍸✨ Get ready to smile, giggle, and maybe even snort as wit meets formality in the most unexpected ways! 🎉😎 #ClassyAndSassy

New funny formal quotes 👇

All funny formal quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections
✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

97 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I like that linguists chose the term ‘loan words,’ implying that one day we’ll get them back.

76 shares on Reddit this month:

Forgot how fun it is to post IG stories. I feel like a female filmmaker.

39 shares on Pinterest this month:

No matter how busy I am, I still find time to waste on Twitter.

47 shares on Telegram this month:

Stop blaming others for your mistakes. Study Feng Shui and blame the furniture.

77 shares on Twitch this month:

My favorite childhood memory is having energy.

45 shares on Messenger this month:

Surround yourself with people who google the menu of the restaurant beforehand.

71 shares on Threads this month:

I wish you could put your whole life on do not disturb.

50 shares on X this month:

Farts are just the ghosts of the things we eat.

42 shares on YouTube this month:

Why do guys named Timothy go by Tim when they could go by Moth?

60 shares on Twitch this month:

I like to begin every day by looking forward to the end of the day.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

13 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m a comedian. My pronouns are ha/ha.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

I used an air fryer for the first time tonight, and I feel like I just discovered fire.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

I swear people go to Starbucks and just say random words. “Lemme get a grande iced mocha no foam quad soy hexagon vortex hypothesis with steamed ice”.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

A lot of childhood characters weren’t so much beloved as there wasn’t anything else on the TV.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m saving myself for my vibrator.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Eating spaghetti to forgetti my regretti.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

You look like the result of a failed CIA experiment.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

No, I don’t want to read the article first, I want to argue now.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Having a girlfriend is insane because you can literally text them, and they will respond.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Of course I have critical thinking skills, I’m thinking critically of you right now.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Jan 31, 2026

Users Online

3,476

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇬 has downloaded:

So annoying when your family knocks on the toilet door and asks what you’re doing. I’m baking a cake. HBU?

Someone from 🇦🇴 has shared:

As an academic, I sometimes dream about writing fiction instead, and then I remember grant proposals.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has bookmarked:

Killing me softly with his schlong.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has copied:

Victor Frankenstein being only 23 years old when he made the monster is crazy to me, he should have been at the club.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has viewed:

Plot twist: weed is addicted to me.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has viewed:

Instead of saying “Good morning,” my wife and I go straight into explanations of how badly we each slept.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has viewed:

“Stalking”. God forbid I have access to public information and know how to utilize my resources.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has shared:

I want someone who will look at me the same way I look at chocolate cake.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has downloaded:

A dyslexic man walks into a bra.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has downloaded:

My New Year’s resolution is to emit a powerful beam of light.

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on Telegram:

People who take care of chickens are literally chicken tenders.

Live now on Twitch:

I’m still trying to dig myself out my ringtone debt from the late 90’s.

Just shared via TikTok:

Online shopping gives me a reason to live for another 3-5 business days.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Nothing hits harder than opening the fridge for the fifth time, hoping new food magically appeared.

Going bananas on Facebook:

The only time you should be faking it is when your pet checks to see if you’re awake.

Breaking via Threads:

I don’t really care how you met your partner. Tell me about how you met your nemesis.

Trending via Facebook:

People my age are parenting actual humans, and I’m over here promising myself snacks if I fold the laundry.

Going viral on X:

You know what I never see anymore are those old alcoholics with the weird noses.

Broadcasted on Threads:

Spider-Man, but set in rural England so he just has to walk everywhere.

Trending via Telegram:

Keep scrolling, I’ve got nothing.

© 2026. All rights reserved.

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴