Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇾 has viewed:

I’m like Pooh Bear. I just want to eat, hang with my homies, and go around pantsless.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has copied:

Sorry I didn’t respond to your message, I got stuck in a cloud while skydiving and lived for 72 days by drinking rain and eating birds that flew too close.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has shared:

If ads were a person, it would be that one neighbor who won’t stop talking to you at the most inconvenient of times.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has copied:

I have a condition where if I don’t walk as fast as humanly possible wherever I go, I will die. I’m like the bus in Speed.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has bookmarked:

Drugs don’t ruin lives. Drug tests do.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has downloaded:

My goal is to do one thing each day that could prevent me from being elected to political office.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has shared:

Welcome to your 40’s: you get excited about avocados now.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has shared:

I say things I don’t mean on spicy chicken.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has bookmarked:

“You tryna hang?” Yeah bro, myself!

Someone from 🇸🇱 has copied:

I have poor night vision so I upgraded to LED headlights because it’s important to me to ensure nobody else can see either.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Feb 3, 2026

3,673

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Threads:

Sometimes I have to turn off the news and put on a true crime documentary, so I can relax.

Going bananas on Threads:

I wish my life could have a stats screen but for things I care about. Like how many English Muffins with peanut butter I’ve eaten.

Going viral on Pinterest:

Screaming into the abyss has lost some of its effectiveness, if I’m being honest.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Chuck Norris can rub two fires together to get a piece of wood.

Spotted on Instagram:

Times New Roman never did anything to anybody. It was a real trooper. Then society unceremoniously dethroned it.

Shared recently on Reddit:

I will improve my life after I doom scroll a little more. Yes.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

Being single allows you to do a lot of things. For example, standing naked in the kitchen at night and eating cold pizza.

Just landed via Reddit:

Turns out I like you a lot more than I originally planned.

Just shared via WeChat:

I hate that I’m so indecisive. Actually, I don’t know if hate is the right word.

Trending via Pinterest:

You come from dust and you will return to dust. That’s why I don’t dust. It could be someone I know.

Funny hot weather quotes

Funny hot weather quotes ☀️🔥 are the perfect way to beat the heat with a smile! When the sun turns up the heat and sweat becomes your new accessory, a little humor goes a long way 😅🌡️. Get ready to laugh through the scorching days and find cool vibes in the hottest moments. Chill out with some witty words that make summer heat feel a little more bearable! 😎🍦

New funny hot weather quotes 👇

It’s so hot out, I just hydroplaned off the toilet seat at work.

4 weeks ago

experience, funny experience, heat, hot, hot weather, humor, hydroplaning, i, just, office, office humor, seat, toilet, weather, work
It’s getting slide guitar and harmonica hot outside.

4 weeks ago

getting, guitar, harmonica, heat, hot, hot weather, instrument, music, outdoor, outside, slide, slide guitar, summer, weather
Sorry if I seem sad, I got a new long-sleeve shirt for fall, but I haven’t been able to wear it yet because it’s 94°.

1 month ago

able, clothing, fall, fashion, frustration, got, heat, hot, hot weather, humor, i, long-sleeve, long-sleeve shirt, mismatch, new, sad, seasonal, seasonal frustration, shirt, sorry, temperature, wear, weather, weather mismatch
It’s so hot that my shadow just went back inside and gave me the finger.

1 month ago

back, finger, heat, hot, hot weather, humor, inside, just, me, reaction, sarcasm, shadow, summer, sun, temperature, weather
It’s so hot here, I’m breaking a sweat just bitching and moaning about it.

1 month ago

bitching, breaking, complaining, frustration, heat, here, hot, hot weather, humor, just, moaning, sweat, weather

All funny hot weather quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

30 shares on Threads this month:

It’s a shame that the know-it-alls know everything better but don’t do anything better.

96 shares on Messenger this month:

My main takeaway from ‘The Walking Dead’ is that you can still eat the expired canned goods in your pantry.

46 shares on X this month:

A friend’s boyfriend is not my friend… that is a coworker, at best.

11 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Did anyone ask the daylight if it wanted to be saved?

59 shares on Facebook this month:

I hate when I change the battery in the bathroom scale, and it starts telling the truth again.

22 shares on Reddit this month:

My life is just a series of awkward moments separated by snacks.

18 shares on Slack this month:

I forgot to turn my clocks back and, oh my God, you guys are not going to believe the stuff that happens in the next hour.

83 shares on Messenger this month:

Unpopular opinion: The moon is actually way more useful than the sun. Because the moon gives us light at night when it’s dark. The sun only gives us light during the day when it’s already bright.

59 shares on Snapchat this month:

I would just once like to feel as powerful as a toddler throwing their sippy cup whilst sitting atop their high chair.

94 shares on Messenger this month:

Shy with a mean resting face is a crazy combo.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

8 folks are currently checking 👀

(Seeing the guy next to me reading a novel) You know, none of that happened, right?

20 folks are currently checking 👀

I just think we should kiss. And kiss and kiss and kiss and kiss and kiss. But that’s just me.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Every time I turn around, it’s Monday.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Public transportation is great, but they should invent a type where it’s only me in the vehicle.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Next on Tiny Houses: A family of 6 moves into a boat emoji.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

The word ‘stan’ comes from the Eminem song “Stan” which is about one of his obsessed fans. What if Eminem named the fan ‘Dennis’? We could be saying, “I dennis Beyonce.”

17 folks are currently checking 👀

It sucks when you realize it’s only Thursday, until you realize it’s only Wednesday.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m eating sandwiches you haven’t heard of in jeans you can’t pronounce.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

When you’re late for work, you gotta walk in fast and act like you’re mad.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,549

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇨 has downloaded:

There are no laws against pineapples on pizza.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has downloaded:

Years of personal growth can be unraveled in 2 days at your parents’ house.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has shared:

A month in Italy has halved my will to work and doubled my desire for money.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has bookmarked:

I got fired from my job at the massage parlor. No specific reason, apparently I just rub people the wrong way.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has shared:

Just give your kids the iPad. They’re the ones who’ll be fighting cyborgs in the future.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has viewed:

After cooking show a dishwashing show with same host but kind of drunk.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has downloaded:

People pleasing doesn’t go well with my black attire.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has downloaded:

If you’re going to be weird, be confident about it.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has bookmarked:

If Twitter has taught me anything, a lot of us aren’t ready for a spelling bee.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has viewed:

Imagine the sound a centipede would make if they wore tiny flip flops.

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on WhatsApp:

Saw the eye doctor, and that’s 90% of the vision test right there.

Just landed via Messenger:

I lied, there’s no sex. Can you tell me a bedtime story?

Spreading quickly via Facebook:

Cleaning your glasses is like changing from 360p to 1080p.

Just shared via Snapchat:

The haters said I couldn’t do it. And they were correct. Honestly, great call from the haters.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

Do clouds ever look down on us and say, “This one is shaped like an idiot”?

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

Born to say “are you f*****g stupid”, forced to say “wow, I’ve never thought about it like that before”.

Seen just now on Messenger:

Ah coffee. The sweet balm by which we shall accomplish today’s tasks.

Going viral on X:

Never put off till tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow just as well.

Broadcasted on WhatsApp:

Sorry, I didn’t text back. I don’t like talking to people anymore.

Going viral on Twitch:

Your annoying online persona has captured my heart.

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Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴