Commentary:
"Who needs a massage when you can be kneaded and rolled like a ball of dough? 🍝😂 Get ready to be transformed into a delicious lasagna with that kind of treatment!"
43 Funny machine quotes
Apologies for the delays. The suitcase smashing machine has broken down, so we’re having to smash suitcases by hand.
Commentary:
"Oh, the joys of modern technology! 🧳💥 Hand-smashed suitcases, the latest trend in travel destruction. Who needs efficiency when you've got good ol' elbow grease, right? 😅 #TravelStruggles"
Every McDonald’s should have a flag they fly at half mast when the ice cream machine is down.
Commentary:
"Imagine the glorious sight of a lonely 'McFlurry Flag' fluttering sadly in the wind… 🍦😂 #McStruggles"
I identify as a McDonald’s ice-cream machine because I go down when you really want me.
Commentary:
"Ah, the enigmatic McDonald's ice-cream machine – forever mysterious in its eternal quest to elude us when we crave a sweet treat 🍦😂 It truly embodies that 'hard to get' mentality in the dessert world!"
A gentleman always straightens out the vending machine after shaking it.
Commentary:
"Well, a true gentleman knows that good manners apply even when dealing with vending machines! 🎩💼 Don't want those snacks to get stuck in a twist now, do we? 😂 #VendingMachineEtiquette"
Once again I feel like I slept in a washing machine.
Commentary:
"Looks like you've upgraded from sleeping like a log to sleeping like a load of laundry! 🛏️🌀 Hang in there, maybe next time you'll wake up feeling fresh and fluffed! 😅"
Vibrators are wrong and unnatural. The Bible said Adam and Eve, not Florence and the Machine.
Commentary:
Looks like even Eve needed some electricity to get her groove on! ⚡🍎😂
My favorite machine at the gym is the vending machine.
Commentary:
"Who needs to lift weights when you can exercise your fingers by selecting snacks from the vending machine instead? 💪🍫 #GymGoals #SnackAttack"
Showering at night is so sexy and clean and self-care vibes. Showering in the morning is so productivity core, cog in the machine core.
Commentary:
Night shower: Feeling like a spa goddess ready to conquer Netflix. Morning shower: Welcome to the shampoo-powered hamster wheel! 🛁✨🔄
My laundry is done, but I don’t even want it anymore. The washing machine can keep it.
Commentary:
Sounds like your washing machine just won a new wardrobe! 😂🧺🌀