Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇾🇪 has viewed:

Why do fish stink so much even though they bathe their whole lives?

Someone from 🇳🇱 has shared:

Don’t listen to any thoughts about yourself if your hair isn’t washed. It’s just not true.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has copied:

The word aerobics comes from two Greek words: aero, meaning “ability to,” and bics, meaning “withstand tremedous boredom.”

Someone from 🇹🇷 has downloaded:

I miss the days when our biggest argument was whether West Coast or East Coast rap was better.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has viewed:

If I text you at 8:10, you’re supposed to reply at 8:09.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has shared:

I recently saw a documentary about dinosaurs. They simply ate everyone they didn’t like. I like that concept.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has shared:

If the zombie apocalypse happens we’re double screwed because there are millions on record as having no brain.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has copied:

I like to play this fun game while I clean out the fridge called what is this, how long has it been in here and how do I kill it?

Someone from 🇼🇸 has viewed:

Winter. You get up, drink coffee and then it gets dark.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has shared:

Life can only give you lemons if you answer the door.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,322

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on TikTok:

“God has a plan for you!” Okay, well, I have some notes for him.

Just landed via TikTok:

JFK is the perfect name for this airport because it’s a bloody headache.

Spotted on Pinterest:

If there’s ever an alien invasion, I hope it doesn’t start while I’m asleep. I hate being woken up before my alarm.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Hey (with the intention of making you forget everyone who came before me).

Trending via Messenger:

Telling my boss I wasn’t drunk really backfired. I probably should have waited until he asked.

Spotted on Instagram:

Stores should accept “I bought this while depressed” as a valid reason for a return.

Making waves on Twitch:

Strangers vomiting their beliefs all over you every day is not good for the soul.

Trending via Reddit:

Instead of renting an apartment, I’m going to save up for a lighthouse and go insane in it.

Just shared via Twitch:

I keep forgetting i’m at the age where people will tell me they’re pregnant and my reaction is supposed to be positive.

Just landed via Slack:

It’s not my job to police the internet, but I just saw someone post a recipe for a cauliflower cake, and I reported them for harmful content.

Funny parent life quotes

Funny parent life quotes bring a burst of laughter to the chaos of parenting 🎉👶 From sleepless nights to unexpected messes, these witty sayings capture the wild ride of raising tiny humans with humor and heart ❤️😂 Perfect for sharing with fellow moms and dads who need a smile (or a coffee) to get through the day ☕️😅 Get ready to giggle and relate—parenting has never been this funny! 🎈🎉

New funny parent life quotes 👇

All funny parent life quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections
✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

68 shares on WhatsApp this month:

And where did Mr. Pepper receive his degree from exactly?

67 shares on Threads this month:

Imagine how much better the world would be if everyone set aside their differences and came together as one to buy me a castle.

11 shares on Messenger this month:

If you get drunk and message your ex, don’t worry. When you wake up, send bitcoin ads and pretend you were hacked.

62 shares on Facebook this month:

My parents didn’t raise me to order something expensive when someone else is paying.

45 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Home is where the Wi-Fi connects automatically and no one chews loud.

16 shares on Twitch this month:

Even at my most powerful, I’m still a little sleepy.

37 shares on LinkedIn this month:

An adult is a person who makes noise when they stand up.

15 shares on Messenger this month:

A hot coffee and a crispy bagel doesn’t change anything but it can’t hurt.

81 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Death doesn’t scare me, but a group of dogs fighting while I’m walking alone on the street does.

36 shares on WeChat this month:

I’m not saying I’m messy, but if Copperfield knew what I can make disappear, he’d be jealous.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

7 folks are currently checking 👀

When people tell me “you’re going to regret that in the morning”, I sleep until noon because I am a problem solver.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

I love cutting off Teslas. Like you may not let me merge over but your car sure as hell will.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

The more water you drink, the more bathroom breaks, the less you work. Stay hydrated.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

If they played poker with potato chips, I’d have a gambling problem.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

If camera lenses are round, why are the pictures square?

24 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m on that new diet where you eat anything you want and you pray for a miracle.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

I’ve tasted long-term relationships, I’ve tasted casual dating. I highly recommend focusing on your career and going to sleep before 9 p.m. ..!

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Drive like no one is watching.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Imagine hating me, and I’m just over here plucking chin hairs.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Millennials are just 30-40-year-olds who look 20-30 years old and feel 80-90 years old.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,724

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇹 has downloaded:

Dating apps are no place for meeting your soulmate. The best way to find your soulmate is to tweet really good.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has bookmarked:

Can’t wait for when we’re all in our 80’s and still tweeting.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has shared:

When one door closes, lock it securely, along with all your other doors and windows, before any inspirational quotes get in.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has copied:

Was that meant to be a joke or did you just accidentally spill a bunch of words you were carrying around?

Someone from 🇻🇪 has shared:

I don’t have any generational wealth but I did inherit a great spaghetti sauce recipe.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has copied:

Me every time I wake up: Oh no, not again!

Someone from 🇵🇭 has bookmarked:

It would be nice to see basic human decency make a comeback.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has downloaded:

Changing my passwords regularly has certainly helped protect my accounts. Against me.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has bookmarked:

You’re telling me people get eight hours of sleep? Like in one night?

Someone from 🇲🇼 has shared:

I think I can now safely say that none of my co-workers were “personality hires”.

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Pinterest:

Never eat more than you can lift.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

Some people’s laughs are funnier than the joke.

Just shared via Reddit:

Technology has really helped me waste my time efficiently.

Trending via Twitch:

Life is weird and then you die.

Trending via X:

I’ve discovered that my visiting family members leave crumbs in the butter. Please keep me in your thoughts during this difficult time.

Trending via Facebook:

Everyone thinks they’re a badass until seaweed brushes their leg.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

Ladies, if you receive flowers with no card on them today, they’re from me.

Spotted on Messenger:

My outfit is from Gucci and the body from Ferrero.

Just shared via X:

Is the elephant in the room with us right now?

Seen just now on Twitch:

Buying a new phone isn’t even satisfying anymore. It’s literally just your old phone with a haircut.

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