Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇶🇦 has shared:

New year; new me. Just kidding. I’m already awesome.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has viewed:

Celery is 95% water and 100% not pizza.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has copied:

I become someone I don’t recognize when I play Monopoly.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has copied:

I am not responsible for what my face does when you talk.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has viewed:

The potholes in my city will change your radio station and unlock the doors.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has copied:

I’m stuck between “I need to save money” and “You only live once.”

Someone from 🇱🇮 has viewed:

Everybody’s back hurts until it’s time to have sexy time.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has downloaded:

Twitter is like a psych ward with no staff.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has copied:

Hey boy, are you my washing machine? Because neither of you know how long 10 minutes last.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has shared:

I can’t believe I’m supposed to obey ALL the traffic laws ALL the time.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,227

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on TikTok:

The reward for doing really good work is more work.

Shared recently on Threads:

I’m so single, even my husband won’t match with me on Tinder.

Spotted on Snapchat:

Dating now is basically choosing which red flag you’re willing to tolerate.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

When I said there’s no such thing as a dumb question, I didn’t expect them to take it as a personal challenge.

Going bananas on LinkedIn:

I love having plans to cancel.

Making waves on WeChat:

Screaming into the abyss has lost some of its effectiveness, if I’m being honest.

Trending via Telegram:

Bro, you gotta try this high-protein Caesar salad, cold brew, air fryer, overnight oats recipe I found on Instagram.

Live now on WhatsApp:

The ability to adjust your vocabulary based on who you’re speaking to is a valuable life skill that many people lack.

Going bananas on Pinterest:

Wow, another wooden ball. Would it kill avocado makers to put a different toy in there?

Seen just now on Reddit:

Who else writes “etc.” knowing damn well you don’t have more examples?

Funny rot quotes

Funny rot quotes bring a hilarious twist to the not-so-glamorous side of life 🍂😂 Whether it’s about embarrassing moments, messy situations, or just the joy of laughing at life’s little disasters, these witty lines will have you chuckling in no time 😜💬 Get ready to embrace the chaos with a smile and share the fun with friends who appreciate a good laugh! 🎉🤣

New funny rot quotes 👇

All funny rot quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

21 shares on Telegram this month:

Every guy wants to be called Daddy till that test comes back positive.

86 shares on WeChat this month:

Whenever my hormones try to get me to reproduce after all, I go to IKEA and watch the goings-on there. After that, I’m good again.

69 shares on X this month:

I am half agony, half hope.

43 shares on Snapchat this month:

Problematic bed time gap relationship.

28 shares on WhatsApp this month:

If a demon ever possessed me, I’d just sit back and say, “Your problem now.”

68 shares on Twitch this month:

I’ll never understand why the volume in movies is always mixed in such a way that you can barely understand the dialog and your neighbor gets war flashbacks during action scenes.

67 shares on TikTok this month:

Marriages are like pancakes. Sometimes you gotta throw the first one out.

23 shares on Messenger this month:

Tech bros are frequently wrong but never in doubt.

74 shares on Slack this month:

A good man is hard to find, but a babysitter for Friday night is harder.

79 shares on Twitch this month:

Having siblings is so important because you learn the exact amount you can annoy someone before they try to physically kill you.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

13 folks are currently checking 👀

True bravery is getting a text from a woman with three questions in it, and only responding to one.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

I love tennis but never really been clear why they need a lifeguard.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

December. The month at work where everything is January’s problem.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

When someone giving me directions says, “You can’t miss it,” I would love to tell them just how wrong they were if I could find my way back to them.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

We’re all in the billionaire submarine now.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

When I dance, people say it reminds them of a wild dog chasing its tail.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

My doctor told me to eat more Taco Bell. Well, he actually said “less McDonald’s”, but I’m pretty sure I know what he meant.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

When I say I love the ocean, I mean I love the surface. Whatever goes on beneath has my respect, but it’s none of my business.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Yawning is the body’s way of telling you it has only 15% battery remaining.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Kinda in the mood to let my feelings impair my judgement.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,615

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇱 has bookmarked:

I feel sorry for Netflix era kids. They will never know the high stakes adrenaline of running away in an ad break, with the beckoning call of a sibling screaming “It’s ON!” to send you hurdling over furniture to get back in time.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has copied:

Whoever named the grapefruit when there was already a fruit named grape. Incompetent legend. I wish we could hang out.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has downloaded:

Sorry, I’m late. My alarm didn’t go off because I didn’t set it, because I don’t want to be here.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has bookmarked:

The show “How I Met Your Mother” was just a really long TED talk.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has bookmarked:

Bold of you to assume I have the energy to even climb a hill to die on.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has copied:

Some people believe the appendix is a vestigial organ, that its use has long since passed. I think it’s primordial. Its use has yet to come.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has shared:

I’m really looking forward to eight hours of thinking about sleep tonight.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has viewed:

I’m 6 donuts away from being the elephant in the room.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has shared:

With a cat on your lap, you deal better with the crap.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has copied:

I purposely overcook my holiday turkeys so I don’t have to hear anyone at the table say, “moist.”

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on Facebook:

There’s nothing I hate more than being comfy in bed and suddenly needing to pee.

Going viral on Threads:

If my toddler doesn’t sleep again tonight, I’m running away into the forest.

Just shared via X:

I have thought one billion times about everything.

Spotted on Messenger:

Not to upset anyone, but Monday is waiting outside.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

My husband keeps borrowing and losing my tweezers, so I’m naming this chin hair after him.

Spotted on Telegram:

Vote for me, I’ll cut the alphabet in half.

Spotted on Discord:

I thought my mixed signals were perfectly clear.

Going viral on WeChat:

Grammar is important. It’s the difference between feeling your nuts and feeling you’re nuts.

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

I don’t hide from my problems, I just ignore them until they lose interest.

Shared recently on Telegram:

If I shook my head at every stupid thing I saw, I’d have permanent whiplash.

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