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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇳 has copied:

Not smiling until Friday; nothing is funny this week.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has downloaded:

Nobody gets angrier than a man being accused of something he actually did.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has shared:

“Autism didn’t exist until recently!” Have you met old guys who work in hardware stores?

Someone from 🇸🇪 has viewed:

Wife asked if I could stop singing Wonderwall. I said maybe…

Someone from 🇨🇿 has downloaded:

Stereotypes are like mass graves. They’re both offensive ways to lump groups of people together.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has copied:

Life is what happens in between trips to the fridge.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has shared:

Let’s take a family trip in this beautiful weather so the kids can complain about family, trips, and beautiful weather that has no wifi.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has shared:

When is this robot army coming to take my job?

Someone from 🇺🇾 has bookmarked:

Vote for me, I’ll cut the alphabet in half.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has bookmarked:

I have thought one billion times about everything.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,414

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Pinterest:

The way Adele works for 6 months and then disappears for 7 years is very much the work-life balance I’m all about.

Going bananas on TikTok:

I am so incredibly tired today. I think my shelf life has expired.

Freshly posted on Slack:

My four moods: I’m too old for doing that. I’m too tired for doing that. I’m too sober for doing that. I don’t have time for doing that.

Making waves on Facebook:

My bad for thinking everyone has common sense.

Spotted on Messenger:

Ever since I was little, I always knew I wanted to retire.

Making waves on Facebook:

But if I get tinted windows, how will people see me flipping them off?

Just landed via WeChat:

90% of the things I worry about never happen. Worrying seems to be working.

Spotted on Instagram:

Dating apps never work for me because I need at least two years of friendship charged with weird sexual tension to even consider falling in love.

Making waves on Reddit:

It’s important to remember that even parents make mistakes. In fact, it’s how many of us became parents.

Shared recently on Facebook:

Reverse cowgirl because you made me mad, and I can’t even look at you right now.

Funny shiny quotes

Funny shiny quotes✨ are the perfect sparkle💫 to brighten your day and add a little glitter🌟 to your mood! Whether you need a laugh 😂 or just want to shine bright like a diamond 💎, these witty gems will have you smiling from ear to ear 😄. Ready to glow up your feed with some humor and shine? Let’s dive into the sparkle party! 🎉✨

New funny shiny quotes 👇

All funny shiny quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

40 shares on X this month:

They should invent a DoorDash but for a kiss goodnight and getting tucked in.

54 shares on Facebook this month:

I get it, credit cards, I’ve reached my limit too.

94 shares on Instagram this month:

My goal in life is to not have to commit seppuku.

64 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Pretty messed up that my body, a chemistry lab made of meat, simply chooses to make me feel a little bit nervous for no reason.

27 shares on WeChat this month:

Foreplay is great, I particularly like the part where I peel them, chop them into pieces, then roast them in the oven until they’re all crispy and delicious.

57 shares on Twitch this month:

If you’re feeling lonely, start a small business. Then you’ll have a little company.

90 shares on Facebook this month:

Well, well, well, if it isn’t the same bill I couldn’t afford to pay in a different color.

27 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Just paid rent. Now I have a place to starve in.

19 shares on Facebook this month:

I am not “quiet quitting”, I am suffering from third-degree burnout.

41 shares on X this month:

Pasta is something I don’t think I’ll ever get tired of.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

25 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m not religious but I know there’s a hell because Monopoly exists.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Social media has given everyone a chance to be heard, and it was a gigantic mistake.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

My southern family thinks my daily routine in NYC is that I wake up, try really hard not to get stabbed by a knife, and then I go see a musical.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

If you show her you care, she will keep you as a spare.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

A moment of silence for those who hate us but can’t unfriend us because they’re afraid of not knowing what’s happening in our lives.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Marriage is so scary. What do you mean I can’t have my own room?

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Insomnia sharpens your math skills because you spend all night calculating how much sleep you’ll get if you’re able to ‘fall asleep right now.’

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Scooby Doo was a woke-ass show. Every villain was just a landlord trying to scare people off their property so they could sell it.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Sorry I didn’t text you back, I was pretending I didn’t see it and ended up actually forgetting.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

People always say, “There’s plenty of fish in the sea” … yeah, but I’ve got my eye fixed on that specific, emotionally distant salmon who has commitment issues.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,402

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇿 has bookmarked:

I’m looking for friends with benefits. And by that I mean friends who have pools, boats and beautiful vacation homes.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has bookmarked:

I’m not an idiot anymore, universe, please stop with the lessons.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has downloaded:

I just tried to poach an egg and I now understand why Eggs Benedict is $23

Someone from 🇮🇩 has downloaded:

You’re the ‘S’ to my ‘HTTP’; without you, I’m just a bad connection!

Someone from 🇮🇹 has downloaded:

Deeply unfair of people to assume I have my life together just because I’m boring.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has bookmarked:

If I’m ever found dead in the woods, it’s probably because I was trying to pet a bear.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has viewed:

My hobbies include saying, “I’m so tired,” and then staying up for three more hours doing nothing.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has shared:

I won’t rest until a cure for insomnia is found.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has viewed:

Still hard to believe that access to infinite information made us dumber.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has shared:

If oats can be milk, you can be whatever you want.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Slack:

You come from dust and you’ll return to dust, so that’s why I never dust. It could be someone I know.

Freshly posted on Threads:

Hate when anxiety gives me stomach problems. Like, baby, you are supposed to be a mental disorder, please stay in your line.

Trending via YouTube:

I stop myself at least twice a day from posting a status that would make everyone grab popcorn.

Going bananas on WhatsApp:

Fog. When nature is too lazy to load the complete environment.

Going bananas on Twitch:

Nobody cleans better than somebody that’s pissed off.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

One of the best examples of someone posing a question that they already know the answer to is the WeightWatchers website asking me if I accept cookies.

Spreading quickly via X:

My toxic trait is binging a show too fast, then getting sad when I have nothing to watch.

Just landed via X:

You relax for 15 minutes after work, and next thing you know, it’s 10 p.m.

Broadcasted on WhatsApp:

A Jackie Chan fight scene where he’s in an IKEA warehouse and he fights off dudes with furniture pieces, but by the end he’s accidentally assembled it all into a complete Malm bedroom set.

Shared recently on Messenger:

Life is just resetting your password until you die.

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