Commentary:
When it comes to showing love, Asian parents skip PDA and go straight to population growth! 😂👨👩👧👦
31 Funny 5 quotes
It’s funny how drinking 8 cups of water a day seems impossible, but 7 beers and 5 shots in two hours go down like a fat kid on a seesaw.
Commentary:
Looks like hydration just needs a rebranding! 🍻💧😆
I used to think “9 to 5” means a job from 9 a.m. to 5 p.m.
Commentary:
I thought it meant nine jobs to five cups of coffee per day! ☕️🤯 #MultitaskingMode
I sexually identify as a microwave dinner, because I am ready in 5 minutes, look nothing like my photos, and I’m just satisfying enough for you to want me again when you’re desperate.
Commentary:
Heat me up and let's hope I don't explode like last time! 🔥😅🍽️
Tech bro obsessed with “storytelling,” but hasn’t read a book in the last 5 years.
Commentary:
When your favorite novel is the 10-page pitch deck! 📊📚😅
It would be cool if, after you died, you could see the top 5 times you almost died.
Commentary:
Imagine the commentary track on those near-miss highlights… 🤔🎬💀
When you realize a 9 to 5 is actually an 8 to 7, since you cannot teleport to work.
Commentary:
"Oh, I see why they call it a 'work day' and not a 'work moment' 😂⏰🚗"
The whole “read before you go to bed to get sleepy” thing does not apply to me because I will be up till 5 a.m. if the book is worth it.
Commentary:
Looks like my sleep schedule is booked solid! 📚😴😂
A man will beg you to take him back just to act right for 5 days and 24 min.
Commentary:
Sounds like he's got a 5-day free trial, but forgot to cancel the subscription! 😂⏳
Winter is actually awesome because if you put on a couple of movies at 5 p.m., it’s already pitch black and the evening is super long, so it feels like you’re staying up til 2 a.m., but in reality, it’s only 11 p.m. 10/10!
Commentary:
Love those winter time blackouts! Where else can you binge-watch guilt-free and feel like a time traveler? 🍿🕰️🌌