Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from 🇻🇪 has shared:

I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has copied:

Remember when the FBI would threaten you at the beginning of every VHS tape? That was pretty cool.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has shared:

Bored as hell. Anyone want to emotionally manipulate each other?

Someone from 🇯🇴 has viewed:

No haunted houses for me this year. If I wanna be frightened, I’ll just look at my 401k.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has copied:

I march to the beat of my own dumb.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has copied:

Watching my wife absolutely hate my daughter’s boyfriend while being nice and hospitable to him has made me question every interaction I’ve had with another human being in my life.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has shared:

Netflix should’ve just maybe mailed us all this fight on DVD.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

330 this month

Funny Quotes Total

14,923

Funny Quotes Topics

17,095

Funny Quotes Images

14,923

Updated

Dec 12, 2025

Users Online

3,809

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Facebook:

Have you noticed? When the relationship is new, the guy is never busy.

Just landed via Reddit:

Line dancing was created by women waiting to use the restroom.

Shared recently on Facebook:

That thing they say about getting drunk with the love of your life in a walkable city is no joke. It hits like crack.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

The moon landing was faked. They actually went to Mars, and I can prove it.

Spotted on Twitch:

When you’re talking to someone and you can tell they’re trying out a new word.

Trending via Messenger:

Euthanizing my Tamagotchi.

Making waves on Snapchat:

Salary week, but salary weak.

Imagine being a bald vampire and every time you walk by a mirror your toupée is just floating.

1 month ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Who knew being undead could come with a bad hair day every day? 😂🧛‍♂️ #VampireStruggles"

absurdity, bald, being, every, floating, humor, imagine, joke, just, mirror, time, toupée, vampire, walk

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Dear life, when I said “can this day get any worse” it was a rhetorical question, not a challenge.

1 month ago
challenge, day, humor, i, irony, life, question, rhetorical, sarcasm
I have an addiction to pattern recognition.

5 months ago
addiction, humor, i, pattern, recognition
I like to play this fun game while I clean out the fridge called what is this, how long has it been in here and how do I kill it?

1 month ago
challenge, clean, cleaning, expiration, food, fridge, fun, game, here, humor, i, kill, mystery, play
My entire life changed once I found out that a crush is just a lack of information.

1 month ago
change, crush, found, humor, i, information, just, lack, lack of information, life, life change, once, perspective, realization, relationships
The real me comes out at midnight (it’s just me spending money online).

5 months ago
humor, just, me, midnight, money, night, night owl, online, online shopping, owl, real, shopping, shopping spree, spending, spree
Before social media, you had to actively go out and find crazy people.

1 month ago
active, active search, before, crazy, crazy person, humor, impact, life, media, modern, modern life, observation, people, person, search, social, social media, technology, technology impact

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Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇭 has copied:

If I was polyamorous, I think Id date my girlfriend three times.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has viewed:

My phone storage is full so I guess it’s time to delete the 27 second video I took of a spiderweb four years ago.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has bookmarked:

Men are like dogs. They’re actually cute, but having my own would be too much work for me.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has viewed:

Every time I buy vegetables it’s a triumph of hope over experience.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has viewed:

The fact that I have more clothes to sleep in than I do to go out in says a lot about who I am as a person.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has viewed:

The year I was born, getting a little far on that little scrolly thing.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has viewed:

The share button on Reddit should be called Spreddit.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Pinterest:

If you can’t wow them with wisdom, baffle them with bullshit.

Just shared via Telegram:

I read all your bumper stickers and now we’re both stupid.

Just shared via TikTok:

Everyone’s gangsta until grandma grabs that wooden spoon.

Live now on Instagram:

I believe in you. I also believe in Bigfoot so don’t get too excited.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

Multitask? I can barely unitask.

Just landed via Slack:

What’s it called when you’re super insecure but, at the same time, you can walk into a room full of people and think you’re better than everyone else?

Shared recently on Instagram:

“What’s your blood type?” I don’t know, boiling!

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Activity Log ✨

Imagine being a bald vampire and every time you walk by a mirror your toupée is just floating.

Dear life, when I said “can this day get any worse” it was a rhetorical question, not a challenge.

I have an addiction to pattern recognition.

I like to play this fun game while I clean out the fridge called what is this, how long has it been in here and how do I kill it?

My entire life changed once I found out that a crush is just a lack of information.

The real me comes out at midnight (it’s just me spending money online).

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

I like when the rain is misty and you get to feel like a grocery store broccoli for a little while.

Just say ‘lol’ and move on.

There are two classes of travel: first class and with children.

I don’t wanna meet your family, bring my plate to the car.

Used dark mode so much that I became physically repulsed when I see a white screen.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

The main reason I got divorced was cause I got married.

ADHD is: being pretty good at basically anything you want to be, and absolutely terrible at anything you need to do to live.

I wonder if people who spend all their time screaming on the internet know there are way more fun things to do.

Nobody talks about the privilege of having a friend who shows interest in your hyperfixations.

God ate when he created sleep, what a beautiful concept.

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

If the line at the grocery store takes longer than 10 minutes, the candy beside the checkout should be free.

I hate hotel bath towels. So thick and fluffy, I can’t even close my suitcase.

Are cassette tapes considered classical music yet?

It’s Friday. Rules don’t apply.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

My eye doctor is alarmingly young and when he said he thought I had a chalazion or a hordoleum, I thought he might be referencing Pokémon.

Real yearners know yearning is not actually fun.

Every house is a dream house when you can’t afford one.

Daily reminder that you’re biologically programmed to get laid, eat good food, connect with other humans, and enjoy yourself. Everything else is literally made up.

At a job interview: think of me as the rightful heir to the throne.

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Imagine being a bald vampire and every time you walk by a mirror your toupée is just floating.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Dear life, when I said “can this day get any worse” it was a rhetorical question, not a challenge.

I have an addiction to pattern recognition.

I like to play this fun game while I clean out the fridge called what is this, how long has it been in here and how do I kill it?

My entire life changed once I found out that a crush is just a lack of information.

The real me comes out at midnight (it’s just me spending money online).

Before social media, you had to actively go out and find crazy people.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

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