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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇪 has downloaded:

I relate to a rooster because I also want start off my day by screaming.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has viewed:

I wonder how biology explains that pain in your chest you get when you found out your partner cheated on you.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has shared:

I feel like whoever named them rice cakes has never actually eaten a cake.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has viewed:

We don’t get a song of the summer this year because we were bad.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has downloaded:

I fear one day I’ll see one of my posts marked as an “Exhibit A”

Someone from 🇦🇴 has copied:

My parents think they know me.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has shared:

I’m so old, I used to cry as a child because I fell off my skateboard or bike, not because I didn’t have wifi.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has shared:

I just want someone who will treat me like a lady and hold the refrigerator door open for me.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has copied:

Caught the bouquet at the funeral.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has copied:

Someone at my job mentioned severance, and I was like, “Oh my God, I love that show,” and they said, “No, I’m about to get fired.”

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,409

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Threads:

You can add tears while cooking if you don’t have salt.

Broadcasted on Threads:

People call me a “Trekkie,” but I’m not. I’ve only seen Star Wars a couple of times.

Going bananas on WhatsApp:

Grab your own butt! Love yourself!

Just landed via Snapchat:

Just overheard someone describe their hike as “it was like mountain climbing, but flat”.

Breaking via Telegram:

One day you’re young and fun, and the next you’re saying, “I wonder how old this tree is.”

Live now on Twitch:

Body: Okay, sleepy time. Brain: Okay, thinky time.

Just shared via Messenger:

So excited to go to bed and have the worst sleep of my life, and wake up exhausted and aching.

Just landed via Telegram:

“Some things are better left unsaid,” I think to myself immediately after I hit send.

Going viral on Snapchat:

If your family starts fighting on Thanksgiving, go live.

Breaking via Pinterest:

I saved a ton of money on a security system by stealing my neighbor’s.

But what if I don’t want someone that’s good for me?

5 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Hmm, sounds like someone's ideal partner is a bag of chips and a Netflix binge 🍟📺🤔

contradiction, good, humor, i, me, preference, relationship, self-awareness, someone, want

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I’ve reached a point in my life where if I can’t find parking, I’m just going to go home.

0

2 months ago

convenience, frustration, going, home, humor, i, just, life, parking, point, priorities, where
Egg nog was invented in Germany back in 1816 when Baron von Heldebrandt reportedly said “Hey guys, let’s get this custard drunk!”

0

2 months ago

1816, back, baron, Baron von Heldebrandt, custard, drunk, egg, egg nog, Germany, guys, heldebrandt, humor, invention, nog, von
Becoming an adult was the worst thing I’ve ever done.

0

2 months ago

adult, choice, done, ever, growing, growing up, humor, life, life choice, responsibility, sarcasm, thing, worst, worst thing
My curse was lifted. Do you want to hang out?

0

2 months ago

curse, friendship, fun, hang, hang out, humor, invitation, socializing, want
Nothing says, “I love you,” like an echo chamber.

0

2 months ago

chamber, communication, echo, echo chamber, humor, i, irony, love, nothing, relationship, sarcasm
I hate hotel bath towels. So thick and fluffy, I can’t even close my suitcase.

0

2 months ago

bath, bath towel, close, even, fluffy, frustration, hate, hotel, humor, i, packing, suitcase, thick, towel, travel

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

15 shares on Slack this month:

I can admit that I am intrigued by people weirder than I am.

21 shares on Twitch this month:

If you’ve been talking for 5 minutes straight, it might be someone else’s turn.

82 shares on Twitch this month:

Working on a laptop outside is an abysmal experience.

47 shares on Telegram this month:

I’m never wrong. Just different levels of right.

60 shares on X this month:

May your coffee kick in, before reality does.

58 shares on Messenger this month:

Watching “Dirty Dancing” as a teenager: Damn right, no one puts Baby in a corner. Watching “Dirty Dancing” as an adult: This girl is a brat and needs a lesson.

53 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Establish dominance by showing up with all your childhood trophies.

43 shares on Threads this month:

Your first non-broke girlfriend will change your whole perspective about relationships.

97 shares on WeChat this month:

Apparently the term for migraine-sufferer is ‘migraneur.’ Nice getting recognition as a kind of artisan of suffering.

91 shares on YouTube this month:

Maybe her DMs haven’t been working for 2 months.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇽 has viewed:

Twitter is like a psych ward with no staff.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has bookmarked:

I’ve already broken all my resolutions and like four commandments.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has copied:

Dollar Tree needs to just go ahead and rename it to A Couple Dollars.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has bookmarked:

How do you politely tell someone that they ruined your life?

Someone from 🇦🇫 has bookmarked:

Social anxiety so bad I wonder if I’m welcome at places I was invited to.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has shared:

My ego is bruised so I’m going to ice it with some cold beer.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has downloaded:

Where can one find a sugar daddy? Asking for a friend.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has downloaded:

Your brain needs exercise just as much as your body does. That’s why I think of running everyday.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has viewed:

Aliens: We are here to take over. Me: Thank God.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has bookmarked:

You’d think the heat and humidity would steam some of the wrinkles out of my body.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Telegram:

When the past calls, don’t answer it. It has nothing new to tell you.

Shared recently on Threads:

At no single point in the Bible does it tell you not to sell drugs.

Just landed via Snapchat:

I refuse to listen to anyone give commentary on the state of society unless it’s in a TikTok video filmed inside their car.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

My DNA came back saying I come from a wide selection of cheeses.

Trending via Facebook:

After overthinking about it for 6 hours, I have decided that it’s actually not that big of a deal.

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

Can I just skip to the part in my life where I’m rich and happily in love?

Spreading quickly via X:

My cat just knocked over my coffee mug and looked at me like it was my fault. How dare I put it on the edge of the table?

Trending via YouTube:

Thunder is fake. It doesn’t even sync up properly with lightning. There’s some guy who waits till he sees lightning and then he presses the thunder button.

Seen just now on YouTube:

May your life one day be as beautiful as you portray it on social media.

Spreading quickly via Pinterest:

When I’m president, everyone who listens to techno, house or rap will be allowed to drive a little faster than others.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

But what if I don’t want someone that’s good for me?

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

I’ve reached a point in my life where if I can’t find parking, I’m just going to go home.

Egg nog was invented in Germany back in 1816 when Baron von Heldebrandt reportedly said “Hey guys, let’s get this custard drunk!”

Becoming an adult was the worst thing I’ve ever done.

My curse was lifted. Do you want to hang out?

Nothing says, “I love you,” like an echo chamber.

I hate hotel bath towels. So thick and fluffy, I can’t even close my suitcase.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨