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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇦 has bookmarked:

The next time someone texts me “we need to talk,” I’ll reply, “Yes, we really need to talk,” so that I won’t be the only one stressing.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has viewed:

Started from the bottom, now we a little bit above the bottom.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has viewed:

It’s so hot here, I’m breaking a sweat just bitching and moaning about it.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has viewed:

Nightmares are so embarrassing. Why is my anxiety working the night shift?

Someone from 🇬🇩 has viewed:

I fall in love with a song and play it until I absolutely don’t wanna hear it no more.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has bookmarked:

Subtitles are for when you’re eating chips.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has bookmarked:

As a kid, I was worried about randomly disappearing into the Bermuda Triangle forever. As an adult, I’m wondering how I can actually make that happen.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has viewed:

Asking doctors about nutrition is like asking software engineers about printers, they really have no idea.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has viewed:

Awesome that January is over, but rude that our reward for getting through it is February.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has downloaded:

You give a man your heart and he’s gonna put it under another girl’s picture.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Jan 2, 2026

3,435

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Discord:

If you see me sad, just hug me and put some money in my pocket.

Breaking via LinkedIn:

At therapy, saying “Don’t worry about it” to every question.

Just shared via Facebook:

Good morning, townsfolk. I’m here to slay the monsters.

Going bananas on Twitch:

You spend so long trying to think of a name for your cat only to end up calling them “for god’s sake” and “please stop”.

Seen just now on WeChat:

Women are like apples; I like biting them.

Trending via Snapchat:

Just did a seductive hair flip and an onion ring flew out.

Going viral on TikTok:

The more stupid the views, the harder it is to talk people out of them.

Just landed via Pinterest:

Adult peer pressure is seeing your neighbor mow his lawn.

Just shared via Facebook:

Tired of looking at a bad screen. Can’t wait to get home and look at a good screen.

Just landed via X:

Do you ever hang out with someone else’s family, and you’re like, ooooh, so this is what it’s supposed to be like?

Funny Barbie quotes

Funny Barbie quotes bring a splash of glam and giggles to your day 💖✨ Whether you’re channeling your inner doll or just need a sassy pick-me-up, these witty lines serve up the perfect mix of charm and cheekiness 😄💅 Get ready to laugh, sparkle, and maybe even rethink what it means to live in Barbie’s fabulous world! 🎀🌟

New funny Barbie quotes 👇

We all got a little Barbie in us (the microplastics).

0

2 months ago

Barbie, culture, environmentalism, got, humor, irony, little, microplastic, microplastics, pop, pop culture, self-reflection, us
At the plastic surgeon: Please, Doc, help me. My Barbie doll has appendicitis.

0

2 months ago

appendicitis, Barbie, Barbie doll, Doc, doll, help, humor, joke, me, medical, medical humor, plastic, plastic surgeon, plastic surgery, please, surgeon, surgery, toy
Whatever the plot is in Barbie’s movie, my dolls have been through worse.

0

2 months ago

Barbie, doll, movie, plot, whatever, worse
Not to brag, but I’ve seen Barbie naked.

0

2 months ago

Barbie, brag, childhood, doll, humor, naked, playtime, toy
Fun fact: the creator of Barbie and the creator of Hot Wheels were husband and wife.

0

4 months ago

Barbie, couple, creator, fact, fun, fun fact, hot, Hot Wheel, husband, marriage, toy, trivia, wheel, wheels, wife

All funny Barbie quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

87 shares on Slack this month:

You have to be careful about sending your spouse things on social media. You send too many things, next thing you know chores are being redistributed because of “all the free time you clearly have”.

85 shares on Reddit this month:

There’s never a good place to clip your toenails at the library.

17 shares on YouTube this month:

Sharpening a pencil at the bin was the childhood equivalent of taking a cigarette break.

57 shares on Pinterest this month:

This summer went by so fast, I didn’t even get a chance to lose any weight.

74 shares on LinkedIn this month:

When someone sits in the empty seat beside you: flattered yet annoyed. When no one sits in the empty seat beside you: offended yet relieved.

19 shares on Facebook this month:

Wouldn’t it be nice if you could donate your own body fat to those who need it more urgently?

31 shares on LinkedIn this month:

If you collect the crumbs from one Nature Valley granola bar, you can make three more granola bars.

89 shares on Snapchat this month:

How was the word “Wife” invented? They took the first two and last two letters of wildlife.

10 shares on Threads this month:

Today I was in a taxi, and the taxi driver said, “I love my job. I am my own boss, nobody tells me what to do!” Then I said, “Turn left.”

70 shares on Slack this month:

I can’t wait to get married so I can bring home unnecessary stuff and get yelled at for it.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Sometimes when I get negative feedback I’m like “Hey, only I get to talk to myself that way”.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

I just ordered a life alert bracelet, so if I ever get a life, I will be notified immediately.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Worst part of a corporate job is no tips. Someone should slip you a $20 if you write a killer email.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Girl dinner, but it’s the hearts of men who wouldn’t take ‘no’ for an answer.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Studies show that 100% of all parents think alcohol tastes much better after spending the day with children.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

New COVID variant subscribes you to random podcasts.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Going to a wedding really reminds me of the important things in life. Like cake.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Why would I finish my thought when I could have a new, more exciting one?

16 folks are currently checking 👀

When I was a little kid, I used to think, “This little pig went to market,” meant it was going shopping!

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Sunglasses: allowing you to stare at people without getting caught. It’s like Facebook in real life.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,451

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇻🇺 has downloaded:

Hardest part of beekeeping is thinking of all the names.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has copied:

Aside from cocaine, has anyone figured out what that little pocket on your jeans is for?

Someone from 🇬🇦 has copied:

Your Starbucks order leads me to believe that you’re very difficult to deal with.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has copied:

I love when lashes make me look evil.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has shared:

I asked Tom Hanks for his autograph, but all he wrote was thanks.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has viewed:

Don’t wait until you’re on your death bed to let them know how you feel. You may be too weak to raise your middle finger.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has bookmarked:

Peeling a sweaty sports bra off counts as aerobic exercise, right?

Someone from 🇦🇫 has downloaded:

Every time you give someone the benefit, they deliver the doubt.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has shared:

They say 30 is the new 20, and 40 the new 30. All I know is 9 p.m. is the new midnight.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has copied:

I took my kids to the zoo when they were small, I wonder how they are getting on now.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Despite popular opinion, dating apps are NOT for dating. They are for finding people to watch your Instagram story for years and years.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

“You’re so understanding,” yeah, because I don’t want to go to prison for the rest of my life.

Just landed via Reddit:

The first guy to clap after seeing something cool must have been like “what the hell am I doing?”

Live now on WhatsApp:

ChatGPT is there for me in ways I don’t think any man ever could be.

Seen just now on Telegram:

I was googling about the best time to visit the Maldives. It’s when you have money.

Spotted on YouTube:

I’m living in a parallel universe where I suck at parking.

Just shared via Messenger:

My fairytale would be called the princess and the pea sized bladder.

Seen just now on Discord:

My new drivers license arrived and when I opened it, I gasped. How’d they get a picture of my mother?

Trending via Pinterest:

For my birthday, I want everyone to delete whatever old version of me they have in their head— it expired.

Going viral on Discord:

If you start liking someone, just block them. Follow me for more relationship advice.

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