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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇩 has viewed:

Everyone becomes a robo-dancer when the motion sensor faucet isn’t working.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has copied:

The closest I’ve come to mastering a martial art is figuring out how to wash my feet in the shower.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has bookmarked:

My therapist says I’m preoccupied with revenge. She’s going to regret that.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has bookmarked:

Moms will vacuum the ceiling, alphabetize the spice rack, reorganize your socks, then say, “No one helps me around here!”

Someone from 🇸🇴 has viewed:

I have a complicated relationship with push/pull doors.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has bookmarked:

Don’t forget to whine and complain about Monday today.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has shared:

If you wait until the last minute to do something, it only takes a minute to do it.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has bookmarked:

The first 7 days of the week aren’t for me.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has downloaded:

If someone asks you: ‘Why are you single, don’t you like people?’, answer: ‘Why aren’t you a millionaire, don’t you like money?’

Someone from 🇨🇱 has downloaded:

When I say I love the ocean, I mean I love the surface. Whatever goes on beneath has my respect, but it’s none of my business.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Jan 31, 2026

Users Online

3,331

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Slack:

After Michael Jordan joined a religious order, he was known as Air Friar.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

I was at a funeral yesterday and spiced things up by walking over to complete strangers and saying “Ignore what everyone else thinks. I, personally, have no issue with you being here”.

Shared recently on Discord:

I really hope my house is haunted and not in need of structural repairs.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

Checking Twitter now is like staring into your refrigerator to see if anything good has magically appeared.

Just landed via YouTube:

My car accidentally drove to a burger shop again. I hate when it does that.

Making waves on Telegram:

Maturing is when you’d rather drink your bourbon half-naked on the couch than go out.

Live now on LinkedIn:

Getting money from the Tooth Fairy is a gateway drug to organ trafficking.

Funny boomer quotes

New funny boomer quotes 👇

My most boomer belief is that you can often get a malfunctioning appliance to work again by slapping it.

2 weeks ago

again, appliance, belief, boomer, boomer belief, humor, malfunctioning, malfunctioning appliance, most, problem, problem-solving, slapping, solving, work
She got me to fall for her, like a boomer seeing an AI image on Facebook.

2 weeks ago

AI, AI image, boomer, dating, Facebook, fall, falling, falling in love, gap, generation, generation gap, got, humor, image, love, me, media, seeing, social, social media, technology
The Gen Z stare. The millennial pause. Instead, let’s talk about the boomer inappropriate personal question.

2 weeks ago

boomer, gen, Gen Z, generation, humor, inappropriate, inappropriate question, millennial, pause, personal, personal question, question, stare, talk, z
My most boomer complaint is that nobody knows how to bring an item out of courtesy to parties anymore.

2 months ago

behavior, boomer, bring, complaint, courtesy, etiquette, item, knows, most, nobody, party, social, social behavior
I really understand why boomers text with ellipses between everything… it feels so good…

3 months ago

boomer, Boomers, ellipsis, everything, feels, gap, generation, generation gap, good, humor, i, style, text, texting, texting style, understand, why
What would boomers do without their paper shredder?

3 months ago

boomer, Boomers, generation, humor, joke, paper, paper shredder, shredder, technology

All funny boomer quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

21 shares on Telegram this month:

Some days you’re the shit and some days you’re the fan.

49 shares on WeChat this month:

We should be able take jets and tanks and stuff whenever we want, we paid for them.

54 shares on Threads this month:

I don’t really like the song “I’ve Got a Feeling” by Black Eyed Peas, but I just like the part where they say “Mazel Tov.”

34 shares on Slack this month:

As long as everything is exactly the way I want it, I’m totally flexible.

67 shares on X this month:

You don’t scare me, you’re not my ID photo.

86 shares on Telegram this month:

How do I gracefully leave this party early but also take the queso dip with me?

93 shares on Messenger this month:

Just imagine if farting were as contagious as yawning.

76 shares on Reddit this month:

Hey man, be careful on the trampoline, one of my buddies never came back down.

92 shares on Twitch this month:

When life hands me lemons, I put them in the fridge next to the bagged salad I’m also not going to eat.

49 shares on X this month:

You know when you tap a video to see how long it’s got left? I wish you could do that to people while they’re talking.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇰 has copied:

On Halloween, I’ll be handing out full size bars of really bad advice. Only while supplies last.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has shared:

Becoming a man doesn’t happen the first time you fight or make love. It happens the first time you see the gas bill and remind everyone that we aren’t trying to heat the outside.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has bookmarked:

The state of my house can best be described as “there seems to have been a struggle”.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has shared:

Can I come over and overstay my welcome?

Someone from 🇧🇬 has shared:

Rage bait often works on me because I was already angry before I read that.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has copied:

There should be guide dogs that prevent you from making bad decisions.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has bookmarked:

James Bond really accurately predicted that the biggest threat to life on Earth is super-rich businessmen, whose money didn’t make them happy, and now their hobby is destroying the world.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has viewed:

Rain cancels plans, upsetting some and delighting others.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has viewed:

Adding “scroll for two hours” to my To-Do list, so I won’t do it.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has bookmarked:

If a demon ever possessed me, I’d just sit back and say, “Your problem now.”

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Messenger:

There should be a special rating system for movies that tells you how uncomfortable you’ll be if you watch them with your parents.

Making waves on WeChat:

Sorry for what I said when I was drunk. I meant every word.

Live now on Telegram:

All arguments are solvable. The trick? Get naked.

Seen just now on Messenger:

Everyone hates math until their paycheck looks funny, then all of a sudden you know trigonometry.

Trending via Facebook:

You know you’re getting old when you have to watch shows that are in English with subtitles.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Telling everyone I’m an undecided voter because I need the attention.

Going viral on Instagram:

Prime Video will find the movie you were looking for and then say, “Oops, you gotta pay for it.”

Going viral on Messenger:

You can pronounce it “Nude Jersey” and no one will know.

Just landed via TikTok:

Lovingly looking at my dog knowing I’m about to ruin her day with a bath.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

Whoever coined the term coined the term coined the term coined the term.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Funny boomer quotes

New funny boomer quotes 👇

My most boomer belief is that you can often get a malfunctioning appliance to work again by slapping it.

She got me to fall for her, like a boomer seeing an AI image on Facebook.

The Gen Z stare. The millennial pause. Instead, let’s talk about the boomer inappropriate personal question.

My most boomer complaint is that nobody knows how to bring an item out of courtesy to parties anymore.

I really understand why boomers text with ellipses between everything… it feels so good…

What would boomers do without their paper shredder?

All funny boomer quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨