Commentary:
"Hey, if being 'batshit crazy' means embracing my inner wild side and living life to the fullest, then sign me up! 🦇🤪 Who needs normal when you can have extraordinary, am I right?"
240 Funny call quotes
Dogs come when they’re called; cats take a message and get back to you later.
Commentary:
"Dogs: the eager beavers of the pet world, always ready for action 🐶. Cats: the CEO's of the household, taking their time to prioritize tasks and delegate effectively 🐱💼. If only we could all have a bit of that feline cool 😎!"
Sundries sounds like something grandma would call scandalous underwear.
Commentary:
"Ah yes, sundries – Grandma's code word for scandalous unmentionables 😏👵💋 Who knew shopping for everyday items could be so risqué? Keep your secrets hidden in the sundry section, folks! 🤫👙 #GrandmaKnowsBest"
If you call me from a private number, I’ll respect your privacy and won’t answer.
Marriage is like a phone call at the night: First there’s the ring, and then you wake up.
If you pass out in front of your kids they will either try to call an ambulance or use you as a trampoline. You just don’t know.
Commentary:
Ah, the eternal dilemma of parenthood: will your kids see you as a helpless patient in need of medical attention, or as a convenient landing pad for some impromptu trampoline tricks? It's a toss-up, really. Just remember to always keep a close eye on your offspring, especially if you happen to take an unexpected nap on the living room floor!
Why do they call it rush hour when nothing moves?
I don’t miss calls, I stare at them.
Commentary:
Oh, so you're not ignoring calls, you're just engaging in a staring contest with them? Well, I guess that's one way to assert your dominance over your phone!
Some people call me crazy. I prefer the term happy with a twist.
