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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇷 has shared:

I know Jesus was a carpenter, but I think he would’ve been a better plumber, you know, with the water thing.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has viewed:

Had an interview today, and my belly rumbled. The lady goes, “Missed lunch?” I told her, “Nah, I’m hungry for success!”

Someone from 🇷🇸 has viewed:

Roman soldiers are all like “I’m going to fight you in this short yet tasteful leather skirt.”

Someone from 🇬🇪 has shared:

“You handled it so well.” Nah, I didn’t. I lost my spark, felt crazy, distanced myself from everyone, and hated myself.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has shared:

No matter how small you make that “unsubscribe” link, I’ll still find it.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has downloaded:

You get your hands on a real serious pair of scissors and wonder what the hell they were doing with the regular ones.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has viewed:

Being friends with introverts is hard sometimes. Did they die? Are they just recharging? Are they Batman now? The suspense is killing me.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has copied:

After careful consideration, I think I’d have way more fun if I was incredibly stupid.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has downloaded:

Nobody could stop me if I wasn’t tired all the time.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has bookmarked:

If Spotify has taught me anything, it’s that I don’t know the correct lyrics to any of my favorite songs.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,535

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Messenger:

Do you ever eat a properly salted meal and suddenly understand why the ancient Romans were willing to be paid in salt?

Trending via Pinterest:

When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, that’s amore. When you swim in the sea and an eel bites your knee, that’s a moray.

Live now on WeChat:

They hooked up tubes and sensors, but the doctor still can’t figure out why my kisses are so sweet. They want to hold me overnight and “never let go.”

Going viral on YouTube:

Once you are able to find humor in any situation, you’ve either reached enlightenment or you’re just a little unhinged.

Just shared via Facebook:

“Well, at least things can’t get any worse” has turned out to be a failure of my imagination.

Making waves on Snapchat:

Jobs be asking me for 3 references, and I think I might start doing the same. Like, let me talk to 3 happy employees, please.

Going viral on WeChat:

First rule for the new year is to not dwell on what went wrong this year.

Going viral on YouTube:

Pretty cool that we all come together on Christmas and celebrate the birth of Santa.

Spreading quickly via Threads:

Nasa is launching a satellite to say sorry to the aliens. They’re calling it the Apollo G.

Shared recently on TikTok:

Day number 3 without coffee: Lost hearing in my left eye.

Funny forbidden quotes

Funny forbidden quotes bring a cheeky twist to words you weren’t supposed to hear! 😜 From sneaky wit to playful rebellion, these gems break the rules with a smile 😏✨ Perfect for lightening the mood or sparking a laugh in unexpected places. Ready to bend the boundaries of humor? Let’s dive into the world where taboo meets hilarious! 😂🚫🔥

New funny forbidden quotes 👇

All funny forbidden quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

45 shares on Snapchat this month:

Social anxiety so bad I wonder if I’m welcome at places I was invited to.

38 shares on Instagram this month:

I wonder if the guy who came up with the term “One Hit Wonder” came up with any other phrases?

50 shares on Threads this month:

Squirrels get most of their energy from chewing on powerlines, that acorn thing is just for show.

75 shares on Slack this month:

Jacket I left on a chair that sometimes looks like a person at night stuns in new evening nightmare.

42 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Relationship status: I’m the only one wearing my hoodies.

62 shares on Twitch this month:

I will marry a man who treats me delicately as if I’m a gift straight from heaven.

18 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I feel for my kids, who had to take in the groceries and put them away today. They may never recover from this traumatic experience.

92 shares on WeChat this month:

The older I get, the more I don’t want to do things.

96 shares on Snapchat this month:

If barking at nothing was an Olympic sport, my dog would win gold.

37 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Some things are better left unsaid, but people get drunk and say them anyway.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

16 folks are currently checking 👀

“I don’t care!”, he posted, again.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

“You never text back.” No, I be reading texts from the notification bar, then forget to text back.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Today I was in a taxi, and the taxi driver said, “I love my job. I am my own boss, nobody tells me what to do!” Then I said, “Turn left.”

13 folks are currently checking 👀

I got fired from my job at the massage parlor. No specific reason, apparently I just rub people the wrong way.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m at that age where I can no longer refer to other people as “elderly.”

24 folks are currently checking 👀

‘I have a ripe avocado at home’ is my favorite excuse for cancelling plans.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

What I want for dinner hasn’t been invented yet.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m not saying I need glasses. But today I watched a bunny in a meadow until it flew away.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Girls who leave clothing reviews with their height, weight, and size ordered are going to heaven.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Tried to sleep by reading a boring book and now it’s suddenly the most interesting book.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,439

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇻🇳 has viewed:

If I’m not back in five minutes, just wait longer.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has bookmarked:

Uber drivers have secret access to a streaming service of exclusively the worst music you’ve ever heard.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has viewed:

Some people are like wallpaper… same pattern repeating every time.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has bookmarked:

I may join the cicadas this summer and just scream for six weeks straight.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has downloaded:

People tell introverts to talk more and get out of their comfort zone, but no one tells extroverts to shut up to make the zone comfortable.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has shared:

Having to pee when you’re driving is problematic. Having to sneeze when you’re driving is even more problematic.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has copied:

In my house the roles are reversed cause my kids tell me to turn my music down.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has shared:

Perhaps the most universal American experience is your mom being like, “Wasn’t he such a good dentist? He’s in prison now.”

Someone from 🇸🇹 has copied:

There should be a Jaws sequel where the shark finally gets arrested for his crimes and goes to jail.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has bookmarked:

Life is pretty much just a series of awkward and embarrassing moments, separated by snacks.

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Facebook:

Big city friend is complaining about a 10 minute wait for a subway while I sit here waiting for the rail replacement horse.

Spreading quickly via Messenger:

Whole crypto scheme is built on people too dumb for crypto that aren’t self-aware enough to realize it.

Just shared via Slack:

Cheers to all who skipped that one dish at Thanksgiving because you just didn’t trust the person who brought it.

Trending via Reddit:

Being sober would be a lot easier if I liked myself.

Going bananas on TikTok:

I can’t stand when people need constant validation online. Like, comment, and retweet if you agree.

Going viral on X:

“Girls just want to have fun!” No, I want one million dollars cash.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

“Topless” doesn’t always mean breasts or a convertible. Sometimes it also means the brain.

Seen just now on Instagram:

It’s freezing cold outside and my polar bear won’t start.

Trending via Reddit:

I could win awards for having a bad memory. In fact, I probably did. How would I know.

Making waves on Twitch:

I can’t believe she picked her husband, her boyfriend and her other boyfriend over me.

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