Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇧 has shared:

Instagram is run by celebrities. Twitter is run by the streets.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has downloaded:

Deleting dating apps because I want to meet someone the old fashioned way (he and his donkey rescue me from a tower guarded by a dragon).

Someone from 🇨🇾 has bookmarked:

Addicted to bad posture like why is it so comfortable to sit like a cooked shrimp.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has shared:

I plan the silliest murders in my dreams because all I have to do to get away with it is wake up.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has downloaded:

No one is more surprised than my kids every night when I say it’s bed time.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has bookmarked:

I don’t know who needs to hear this, but you don’t need anything from Amazon today.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has viewed:

I actually think it’s quite beautiful that you have to be the one to save yourself.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has viewed:

I used to be cool, but now I just can’t wait to get on the couch by 7 p.m., in my pajamas, with a quilted blanket.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has copied:

Your Starbucks order leads me to believe that you’re very difficult to deal with.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has viewed:

Siblings are proof you can love someone and also dislike them at the same time.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

68 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,337

Funny Quotes Topics

17,452

Funny Quotes Images

15,337

Jan 2, 2026

3,344

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Pinterest:

Microdosing Christmas by being present.

Seen just now on TikTok:

I never forget to eat, but I do eat to forget.

Breaking via Discord:

I’m of the very strong opinion that sex ed should be taught by a woman 37 weeks into her third pregnancy, while her husband sits scrolling through his phone, and her other two children run wild.

Making waves on YouTube:

People will name their dog Steve and have two kids named Buddy and Rocket.

Going viral on Instagram:

I unload the dishwasher backwards… just to feel something.

Freshly posted on Slack:

After I get irritated, it takes me about 2 hours to fix my face.

Shared recently on WeChat:

I do all my own stunts, but never intentionally.

Spotted on Pinterest:

Can’t argue with a guy that has curly hair. Whatever you say, gorgeous.

Spreading quickly via Messenger:

Your honor, I was in my villain era at the time of those incidents.

Going viral on Pinterest:

Video games are great. They let you try out your craziest fantasies. For example, on The Sims, you can have a job and a house.

Funny health insurance quotes

Funny health insurance quotes bring a hilarious twist to a topic we all love to avoid! 😂💊 From mind-boggling premiums to unexpected copays, these witty lines turn confusion into comedy. Whether you’re a policy pro or just trying to figure out your coverage, get ready to laugh your way through the fine print! 🤣📄💉 Say goodbye to boring insurance talk and hello to some lighthearted relief!

New funny health insurance quotes 👇

My favorite part about health insurance is how your teeth and eyeballs are add-ons.

0

2 months ago

add-on, cost, eyeball, favorite, health, health insurance, insurance, insurance cost, sarcasm, teeth, tooth
I’m so hungry, I could eat a full-time job with health insurance.

0

2 months ago

eat, eating, health, health insurance, humor, hunger, hungry, i, insurance, job, joke, salary, work, work humor, workplace
They should invent health insurance that insures your health.

0

2 months ago

health, health insurance, humor, insurance, invention, irony, should, wellness

All funny health insurance quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

55 shares on Instagram this month:

People can’t drive you crazy if you don’t give them the keys.

12 shares on Threads this month:

Fun fact: a person’s music taste can actually tell their intelligence level.

14 shares on Telegram this month:

Got possessed by a demon once, and everyone was like, “OMG, did you do something with your hair?”

41 shares on Snapchat this month:

Some people are like “I’m a people pleaser,” and not a single person is pleased with them.

78 shares on YouTube this month:

The bowling ball actually hangs out with the pins after work. There isn’t beef there.

89 shares on X this month:

Women don’t pretend anymore to dig for something in their purse and then pull out their middle finger.

72 shares on Messenger this month:

I miss my kids the most when they go to bed and the mosquitoes go after me because they have no other options.

76 shares on Instagram this month:

I’ve got nothing against kids, I just don’t understand why you’d want indoor kids.

15 shares on Telegram this month:

Girls love a gay best friend until he turns 35 and asks to borrow your womb.

60 shares on Slack this month:

Gonna vibe recklessly and call it “character development”

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Jokes on you, unknown number. I barely answer my phone for people I know.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

I got confused by all the yard signs, and I think I may have voted for a realtor.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

I got a bumper sticker that says, “Honk if you think I’m pretty.” Sometimes I just sit at green lights until I feel better about myself.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

There’s nothing like the excitement of a brand-new book to add to the massive pile of books I still haven’t read.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Getting into male-dominated fields like falling asleep on the couch.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

I don’t argue with idiots on the Internet, I just keep scrolling and mind my own business.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Most meetings end with the conclusion that everything needs to be discussed in another meeting.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Once you start paying rent, every joke stops being funny.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Have come to the devastating realization that I am an over-nodder on video calls.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Pomegranates are worth the mess.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

68 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,337

Funny Quotes Topics

17,452

Funny Quotes Images

15,337

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,652

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇸 has bookmarked:

Sorry boys, but I’ve already got my eyes on a guy who’s not interested.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has viewed:

“Careful. It’s slippery!” – Everyone, after you’ve already slipped.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has downloaded:

The best time to start a family fight is now. It gets you out of buying relatives gifts.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has copied:

I have browser tabs open that are older than you.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has shared:

Just waiting for my laundry to be done so I can pop it in the dryer and forget about it again.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has copied:

Girls who leave clothing reviews with their height, weight, and size ordered are going to heaven.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has copied:

I’m not a fan of camping, if I wanted to sleep outside I wouldn’t pay my mortgage.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has viewed:

Asserting dominance by starting all my private DMs with “I hope this DM finds you well.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has downloaded:

One thing that sucks about being grown-up is not being able to say, “My mom said no,” when you don’t want someone to come over.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has bookmarked:

My brain says “Let’s do something exciting today” but my body says “Don’t listen to that fool.”

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via WhatsApp:

I get it, drug commercials. I too like to dance while I describe all my side effects.

Live now on Twitch:

Your future doctor is using ChatGPT to pass med school so you better start eating healthy.

Just shared via Snapchat:

If you start liking someone, just block them. Follow me for more relationship advice.

Trending via TikTok:

Yeah, baby, I am an animal in bed. More specifically a koala. I can sleep for 22 hours a day.

Breaking via WhatsApp:

So you like bad boys? Cause I’m bad at everything.

Going viral on Messenger:

I hope nobody sees me eating by myself and feels sorry for me. I’m having the time of my life.

Just landed via X:

Forget mini pizzas. I want one so big it needs a forklift to rotate it.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

Finding a person to make eye contact with during stupid meetings is essential to survival in the workplace.

Spotted on Facebook:

Who decided that skeletons are scary? Because honestly, I’d be more scared if the muscular system suddenly walked into my room.

Making waves on Telegram:

The only way to my heart is with a knife.

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