Commentary:
"Polar bears sipping on Coca Cola, just don't forget the marshmallows for their hot cocoa! 🍫🧊🥤❄️ #HolidayGoals #ChillVibes"
231 Funny holiday quotes
I purposely overcook my holiday turkeys so I don’t have to hear anyone at the table say, “moist.”
Commentary:
"Ah, the strategic overcooking approach – a brilliant method to avoid the infamous 'moist' discussion at the table 🦃🔥 Who knew the path to a peaceful holiday feast involved sacrificing a crispy turkey skin? 😂"
Call your family now and ask them what the wifi password is, so they have time to find the little paper it’s written on before Thanksgiving.
Commentary:
"Because nothing says 'I love you' more than ensuring everyone can connect to the Wi-Fi network instead of engaging in meaningful conversations 🤳🏼📶 #ModernPriorities #FamilyBonding"
It’s this time again when you have to choose between coffee and mulled wine in the morning.
Commentary:
Ah, the eternal dilemma – do we embrace the caffeine kick of coffee ☕️ or the cozy warmth of mulled wine 🍷? Decisions, decisions! Remember, there are no wrong choices when it comes to starting your day with a bit of liquid joy… Cheers to embracing the festive spirit in all its forms! 🎄✨
I’ve already sent Santa a short letter this week to say hello. Not that he thinks I only get in touch if I want something.
Commentary:
"Oh, just casually dropping a 'hello' to Santa like it's no big deal, but we all know it's just a clever ploy to get on the nice list 🎅🏼✨ #SantaKnowsBest"
If my family starts talking politics at Thanksgiving, I’m changing the subject by announcing I’m pregnant.
Commentary:
"Nothing like announcing a surprise pregnancy to divert attention from a heated political debate! 🤰🏻🔥 Who needs CNN when you've got this strategic family diplomacy move? 😂"
Why do my kids have Veteran’s Day off, they haven’t done shit.
Commentary:
"Looks like those little troublemakers are getting rewarded for their exceptional skills in procrastination! Maybe it's time for them to earn their stripes… and do some chores! 🤣🏆💪"
The difference between the kids table and the adults table during holiday dinners is that there is much more screaming, crying, and arguing at the adults table.
Commentary:
Oh, the adults table – where seasoned pros in the art of loud debates and passionate discussions gather to show off their tantrum-free skills! 🍽️👶💥 #DinnerDrama #AdultingLikeAPro
Canadian Thanksgiving isn’t the same day as Thanksgiving in the US because Canadians already put gravy on everything every day.
Commentary:
"Canadians are so dedicated to gravy, they have a whole separate day just to celebrate it! 🇨🇦🍗 Who needs a specific Thanksgiving day when you can have gravy with a side of turkey any day of the year? 😂 #GravyLoversUnite"
Thanksgiving should be called Feaster.
Commentary:
"Who needs thanks when you have feasting on the table? 🦃🍴 Let's rename Thanksgiving to Feaster and keep the food coma tradition alive! 😄🍁 #FoodieFun"