Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇻 has viewed:

Adulting looked way more affordable in the 90’s. I feel scammed.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has viewed:

Stay up till 4 a.m. one night, and your sleep schedule is ruined for the next 4 years.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has shared:

Life is just resetting your password until you die.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has downloaded:

I haven’t lost my virginity because I never lose.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has copied:

I would describe my personal style as whatever is on top of the pile of clothes on the floor.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has bookmarked:

My body cracks like a glow stick every time I move, but refuses to light up.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has downloaded:

Gonna mess with my husband by texting “send nudes” when he’s in a work meeting.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has copied:

The best part about Smarties is pouring them into an empty prescription bottle and shaking them all into my mouth while waiting in line.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has bookmarked:

According to my calculations, we’re all screwed.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has bookmarked:

50 is the new 30. Because it takes 50 bucks to buy what 30 used to.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 20, 2026

Users Online

3,660

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Instagram:

Dear algorithm, only show this post to the most attractive and successful people.

Just landed via Telegram:

I can’t stop thinking about how a tanning bed really turns you into the human version of a gas station hot dog.

Making waves on Discord:

I love when the universe delivers receipts.

Making waves on Reddit:

And are the people who find you “hilarious” in the room with us now?

Spotted on Slack:

College is not even mentioned once in the Bible. Somebody get me outta here.

Seen just now on X:

The only thing that drains faster than my phone battery is my bank account.

Seen just now on Twitch:

Please don’t send me mixed signals, I don’t even understand the clear ones.

Making waves on Instagram:

Went to the gym two days in a row. This is a fitness account now.

Trending via X:

If I block you and you email me, you’re getting another chance.

Broadcasted on LinkedIn:

The adjective for metal is metallic, but not so for iron, which is ironic.

Funny malfunction quotes

Funny malfunction quotes are the perfect way to laugh off those tech troubles and unexpected glitches 🤖💥 Whether your gadgets go haywire or your apps decide to take a coffee break ☕️, these witty lines turn frustration into fun 😂✨ Get ready to smile through the chaos and embrace the quirks of malfunctioning moments!

New funny malfunction quotes 👇

All funny malfunction quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections
✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

26 shares on WhatsApp this month:

You didn’t get fired, your job “fumbled you”.

42 shares on Slack this month:

This year is starting to feel like it needs to be left outside until we see if it can act right.

77 shares on Messenger this month:

So blunt, you can smoke my truth.

89 shares on LinkedIn this month:

You ever tried driving the speed limit and thought, “They can’t be serious.”

51 shares on Facebook this month:

A single garbageman contributes more to society before lunch than every crypto trader and op-ed writer combined does in their lifetime.

46 shares on Telegram this month:

Summer is the time when it’s too hot to do what it was too cold to do in winter.

69 shares on Discord this month:

I thought I needed a drink. Turns out what I really needed was a divorce.

62 shares on Snapchat this month:

Beautiful women named Severe Thunderstorm Warning are blowing up my phone.

46 shares on Discord this month:

Best friends should be able to apply to jobs together and get hired as a set.

68 shares on TikTok this month:

In a packed elevator, everyone is silent. Stomach: I will now demonstrate the mating call of a whale.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Free marriage tip: Don’t ask your wife when dinner will be ready while she is mowing the lawn.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

“I’m not short. I’m just more down to earth than most people.”

9 folks are currently checking 👀

I don’t know who needs to hear this, but that much caffeine can’t be good for you.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

The shitshow must go on.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Hope this email finds you moonwalking out of work early.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

The sexual tension between me and disappearing without an explanation.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Sometimes I’ll drink a ginger ale and eat a Biscoff cookie and sit up in kind of an unnatural position and pretend I’m on a Delta flight.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

I’ve deleted enough tweets to know that I should never get a tattoo.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Not being able to fall asleep is so embarrassing. All I’m asking my brain to do is nothing and it can’t even do that?

17 folks are currently checking 👀

I have two reactions when I leave the house: Ew, the people. Ew, the weather.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 20, 2026

Users Online

3,572

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇲 has copied:

Would pay $10 a month for Summer Premium Package without wasps.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has downloaded:

Rain cancels plans, upsetting some and delighting others.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has viewed:

I don’t always listen to Metallica, but when I do, so do my neighbors.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has copied:

I’m afraid to go to therapy — what if they fix me and I lose my funny?

Someone from 🇹🇴 has shared:

I’m like 2% cute and 98% ugly.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has downloaded:

So many people say they love their Roomba, but you never see them set it free.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has viewed:

You should get one IG story in addition to your one phone call when you’re arrested.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has viewed:

I hate lying to my parents but it’s for their own good.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has shared:

I know everything is expensive right now, but just remember correcting people’s grammar online is still free.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has bookmarked:

I think that McDonalds is putting an unhealthy amount of lettuce in the Big Macs these days.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Messenger:

As a beautiful woman, sometimes the most powerful thing you can say is “ew.”

Spotted on Discord:

The evening news: Where they begin with “Good evening” and then proceed to tell you why it’s not.

Going viral on Snapchat:

Those astronauts that just landed? They should be greeted by chimpanzees on horses.

Going bananas on Discord:

The worst thing about being an adult is that you have to be one every single day.

Making waves on Reddit:

Relationship status: We have changed from “I love you” to “I love YouTube”.

Spotted on Snapchat:

Halloween is the only day you can ghost someone and blame it on being festive.

Seen just now on Discord:

I should have peed before I left, and other things I’ll never learn: A memoir

Just landed via Pinterest:

I believe that emails are trying to tell us something.

Just shared via Snapchat:

Spotify Wrapped: February was your basketball watermelon loudspeaker phone call hip hop moment.

Spotted on Threads:

Get a puppy if you are in the market for a best friend who gets you up early so she can bite you excitedly.

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