Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇬 has downloaded:

Almonds are a scam. They are wood. You are eating wood.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has viewed:

Now I know why my dad used to wake up at 4AM and just sit at the kitchen table for an hour.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has bookmarked:

Everyone hates on Gollum but he had the right idea: become a hermit, collect jewels, swim naked in lakes and pools, occasionally hiss at people who try to make you go places.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has downloaded:

I know my limits. I don’t always obey them, but I know them.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has copied:

The hottest thing a man can do is exactly what he said he was going to.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has bookmarked:

Could a mosquito drink blood out of a cup or something or are they legally required to Capri Sun my legs all summer?

Someone from 🇸🇰 has copied:

I told all my neighbors that I have a twin, so that when I see them in public I don’t have to talk to them.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has viewed:

Every day, I go to work and draw a little tick on everyone who didn’t say goodbye to me the day before.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has copied:

Have you tried making guacamole about it?

Someone from 🇲🇦 has shared:

Keeping a picture of my bed in a locket around my neck and staring at it longingly on my lunch break.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,554

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Instagram:

Porn is free, so why are you in my DMs?

Shared recently on Facebook:

I need to know the brand of toothbrush my neighbor has. I hear it buzzing sometimes an hour at a time and she’s clearly enjoying it.

Just landed via Telegram:

Walmart was wild as hell today, so I fit right in.

Just shared via Instagram:

Carrying a conversation counts as cardio.

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

Post-standing clarity is like, damn, I could have been sitting this whole time.

Trending via YouTube:

Why is being alive so expensive? I’m not even having a good time.

Shared recently on Twitch:

On the internet, you can be anything you want. It’s strange that so many people choose to be stupid.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

I only use ‘sir’ disrespectfully.

Just landed via X:

We’ve been talking about eating the rich for so long, they got over-ripe.

Trending via Discord:

Ground beef implies the existence of sky beef.

Funny millionaire quotes

Funny millionaire quotes 💸😂 bring a lighthearted twist to wealth and success, proving that even the richest can have a great sense of humor! From witty takes on money to clever insights about luxury living, these quotes will make you smile while giving a fresh perspective on fortune. Ready to laugh your way to riches? Let’s dive into some hilarious millionaire wisdom that’s as priceless as the bank accounts behind it! 💰😎✨

New funny millionaire quotes 👇

All funny millionaire quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

28 shares on Messenger this month:

If we “talk,” you ain’t single. We’re in a pending relationship. You’re in the cart.

29 shares on Pinterest this month:

I call my period Shark week. I want to eat everything, I’m snapping at people, I feel huge, people are scared of me, and there is blood everywhere.

12 shares on Threads this month:

“Delusional” ain’t a strong enough word to describe people anymore.

72 shares on Instagram this month:

Confucius says: “Those who drink a lot die earlier, but have seen twice as much in life.”

71 shares on Discord this month:

No more relationships for me, the last one was an embarrassment to my gangsta.

26 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Today’s youth will never experience the pain of spending all their pocket money on a music album. Because of ONE good song!

40 shares on WeChat this month:

Since I’ve stayed away from most people, I get on much better with people.

17 shares on YouTube this month:

New year update: losing everything but weight.

33 shares on WeChat this month:

January is the Monday of the year.

48 shares on Messenger this month:

“Be the bigger person” sounds too much like “accept the disrespect”.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

11 folks are currently checking 👀

I forgot how to panic. Help!

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Remember: if nobody hates you, you’re not trying hard enough.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

I’ve decided to cut my carbs… into smaller pieces before eating them.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m so toxic, I can fight for a relationship I don’t even want.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

The clitoris has 8,000 nerves, if you gonna get on my nerves, get on one of those.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Men become instantly more attractive when they wear aviators; it’s science.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Going to ragebait men by asking, “Do you ever wish you were tall?”

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Someone was saying that social media makes you miss out on your real life, but have you seen real life?

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Me watching any modern ad: How is this ad an ad for the thing it’s an ad for?

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Blackout curtains are dangerous, because it’s 1 p.m. outside and 1 a.m. in here.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,351

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇹 has downloaded:

Honestly, I don’t even play an active role in my life any more. Things just happen and I’m like “I guess this is what we’re doing now.”

Someone from 🇯🇴 has copied:

I am writing a book about reverse psychology. Please don’t buy it.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has bookmarked:

Happy to report that “what time is it/time for you to get a watch” is still being used by the youths.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has downloaded:

Explain it to me like I’m 5 drinks in.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has bookmarked:

I’m not being smart, I’m just a skilled trained professional in pointing out the obvious.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has bookmarked:

I feel like I’m in jail when I’m around unfunny people for too long.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has downloaded:

I finally have glasses, which is great because I needed one more thing to frantically search for every morning.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has bookmarked:

If you keep the house dark, not only do you save on electricity, but it also looks cleaner.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has copied:

Maybe if we all sit extremely still, Monday won’t be able to see us.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has bookmarked:

If I had a bf, I’d be a gf.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via WhatsApp:

Guys love being called “daddy” until the pregnancy test comes back positive.

Spotted on Instagram:

I’m at the age where I have to warm up first before jumping to conclusions.

Trending via YouTube:

The older I get, the more I hate making extra stops after work. I drive home like I’m late for the house.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

I’m opening a secret ice cream club called The Inside Scoop.

Going viral on X:

Ever since I was a little kid, I knew that I wanted to be late for work.

Live now on Snapchat:

Engagement photo shoots are so funny as a concept. Like girl, we believed you.

Spotted on Messenger:

I put the “pro” in procrastinate.

Trending via Threads:

Cheers erupt as woman cuts into perfectly ripe avocado.

Spotted on Instagram:

If you listen to my husband snore, you don’t need Jurassic Park anymore.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

Asbestos? I’m doing asbestos I can.

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