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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇵 has shared:

Neurodivergents will be like, ‘I’m so tired,’ and then refuse to sleep because they haven’t had enough me time after surviving the day.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has shared:

Got possessed by a demon once, and everyone was like, “OMG, did you do something with your hair?”

Someone from 🇸🇬 has downloaded:

My favorite date activity is ice skating because I’m really good at it, and it allows me to assert dominance on the ice.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has copied:

I’m really hoping money falls from the sky this week, or else I’m doomed.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has downloaded:

Money will not leave you on read for 9 hours.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has shared:

Never vacuuming so I don’t disrupt my carpet’s natural micro biome.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has copied:

Don’t worry, man, we can probably Photoshop the deep and enduring sadness out of your eyes later.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has bookmarked:

Yes officer, I’d like to file a restraining order against my dentist’s appointment reminder system.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has bookmarked:

If I was Snow White, you wouldn’t get me with an apple. You’d have to poison a taco or something.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has bookmarked:

Trying to work outside on a laptop is like sunbathing on a melting ice cube.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,537

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on TikTok:

I want to be in Metallica, and they will not let me.

Seen just now on Messenger:

Enjoy the time between diapers!

Breaking via Reddit:

Sometimes when I get negative feedback I’m like “Hey, only I get to talk to myself that way”.

Just shared via Pinterest:

Nothing makes me feel more powerful than when I write ‘furthermore’ in an email.

Just shared via Facebook:

That fight could’ve been an email.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

9-5 is really 10-2 if you’re working remote.

Spotted on Pinterest:

I’m an expert at having a really funny story to tell and then wording it so badly that it’s not even funny anymore.

Just landed via Pinterest:

I think my dad just eradicated a small village with his sneeze.

Seen just now on Slack:

If you occasionally blow on your bourbon during a Zoom meeting, the other folks will think you’re enjoying a hot cup of tea.

Broadcasted on WeChat:

What are some beginner bad habits for someone just getting into ruining their life?

Funny physical activity quotes

Funny physical activity quotes bring a burst of laughter to your workout routine 🏃‍♀️😂 Whether you’re jogging, stretching, or just pretending to exercise, these witty lines keep the energy high and the mood light 🎉💪 Get ready to smile, sweat, and maybe even snort a little while you move—because fitness should always come with a side of fun! 😜🔥

New funny physical activity quotes 👇

All funny physical activity quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections
✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

73 shares on WhatsApp this month:

“Are you free tomorrow?” No, tomorrow I’m still expensive.

44 shares on YouTube this month:

“It gets to a point” is one of my favourite phrases because it literally does get to a point sometimes.

33 shares on Telegram this month:

Dear algo, please only show this post to benevolent aliens.

68 shares on Instagram this month:

First you’re cringe, then you’re the blueprint.

95 shares on YouTube this month:

At a certain age, all you really want is a good mattress.

77 shares on Slack this month:

“Overdressed” is a social construct created by hating girls.

17 shares on Instagram this month:

Work meetings would be a lot more fun if they took place in a giant IKEA ball pit.

86 shares on Discord this month:

A girl hating you is a million times better than her calling you a ‘nice guy’.

73 shares on TikTok this month:

Daylight savings is just a made up holiday to sell more daylight.

87 shares on Facebook this month:

You didn’t lock in hard enough if you’re not feeling asexual.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Newborns cry because they’re being evicted.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Standing on a scale and thinking: so much wisdom and inner beauty can’t be light.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Everyone’s a badass until the doorbell rings.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Calling women “bro” to make sure they know they’re in the deepest trenches of the friend zone.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

My child had pancakes and syrup for breakfast so I guess I’ll be sticking to my furniture for the next week.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

When I find it, I don’t need it. When I need it, I can’t find it.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

You can be anything. Be the person who ends meetings early.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Age is just a number that you keep off of Facebook after 35.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

I can’t decide if people who wear pajamas in public have given up on life, or they are living it to the fullest.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

You can add “cha cha cha” to any sentence you want without explaining yourself. Nobody really appreciates this.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,571

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇳 has bookmarked:

Last night my guardian angel came to me, covered me up, gave me a kiss on the forehead and whispered in my ear: “You’re a pain in the ass!”

Someone from 🇧🇮 has bookmarked:

“I’m disgusted by how many of you still use Spotify. I use a fair trade, ethically conscientious mom-and-pop platform called Apple Music.”

Someone from 🇧🇷 has downloaded:

80% of Americans just want to put on sunglasses and say, ‘Let’s do this.’

Someone from 🇿🇲 has bookmarked:

The ugliest version of me is the version that comes out when I play board games. I don’t know who she is, but she is a monster. She is not fit for human interaction.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has viewed:

Keep your fries close and your onion rings closer.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has downloaded:

When I grow up, I’d like to be a retired lottery winner.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has copied:

I’m currently trying not to read anything about carbohydrates after 4pm.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has viewed:

My ducks: in a row. My elephant: addressed. My eggs: several baskets. My bigger fish: fried.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has copied:

Therapy is life letting you speak to the manager.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has bookmarked:

Ribbed condoms don’t even taste like ribs.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Facebook:

“AI is coming for your job.” Yeah, I’d like to see AI drink 11 coffees, then have a panic attack.

Shared recently on Reddit:

I can’t wait til I have hearing aids, so I can just turn them off when I’m tired of hearing everyone.

Live now on Instagram:

Calling a lobotomy a “lobobo” to fit in with Gen Z.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

I wonder how many different vegetables they exploded before they discovered popcorn.

Shared recently on TikTok:

They say 30 is the new 20, and 40 the new 30. All I know is 9 p.m. is the new midnight.

Going bananas on TikTok:

Took a bunch of Ibuprofen to keep my posts from being too inflammatory.

Just landed via YouTube:

I eat my first meal of the day in the afternoon, bro. Don’t ask me for advice.

Breaking via WhatsApp:

Source? It was revealed to me on my walk.

Seen just now on YouTube:

You get your hands on a real serious pair of scissors and wonder what the hell they were doing with the regular ones.

Live now on Facebook:

Strangers vomiting their beliefs all over you every day is not good for the soul.

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