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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇩 has shared:

Crazy how many organs in your body are dedicated to the poopification of dinner.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has shared:

Another fine day ruined by responsibilities.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has downloaded:

Diarrhea. Having it. Spelling it. Everything about it is shit.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has copied:

If it turns cold one more time, I’m gonna put the Christmas tree back up.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has bookmarked:

December calories don’t count. That’s the law.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has downloaded:

Money doesn’t impress me. Giving it to me does.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has copied:

Dating after 40 is like trying to find the least damaged item at the thrift store that doesn’t smell.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has downloaded:

You think you’re aging well and then you feel an earlobe hair blowing in the wind.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has viewed:

Bad news. Right now is as young as you’re going to be.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has bookmarked:

If I win the lottery, I’m buying four politicians and some really nice shoes.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

643 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,236

Funny Quotes Topics

17,359

Funny Quotes Images

15,236

Updated

Dec 30, 2025

Users Online

3,748

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via TikTok:

Do you ever eat a properly salted meal and suddenly understand why the ancient Romans were willing to be paid in salt?

Just landed via YouTube:

Neurodivergents will be like, ‘I’m so tired,’ and then refuse to sleep because they haven’t had enough me time after surviving the day.

Shared recently on Telegram:

Love is in the air fryer.

Just shared via Telegram:

Beginning of August is always wild because it’s peak summertime, but the veil is so thin, like it’s Halloween.

Seen just now on Telegram:

I don’t know which aunty needs to hear this, but focus on your own child.

Spotted on Instagram:

Someone asked me how much I spend on a bottle of wine. 30 minutes was not the right answer.

Trending via Pinterest:

My love life feels like when you finally spot an open space in a full parking lot — and then boom, it’s a motorcycle.

Broadcasted on Telegram:

I’m not afraid of ghosts because everyone who’s mad at me is still alive.

Just landed via TikTok:

You should leave your comfort zone and come to mine instead.

Shared recently on Reddit:

If kids these days had a perfume, it would be called Audacity.

Funny roof quotes

Funny roof quotes bring a smile from the top down! 😂🏠 Whether you’re dealing with leaky shingles or just love a good pun about rooftops, these witty lines will lift your spirits higher than your attic. Ready to laugh your roof off? Let’s raise the fun meter and keep things light, one clever quip at a time! 🌟🔨😄

New funny roof quotes 👇

All funny roof quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

72 shares on X this month:

That was a nice hour long Twitter scroll. Feel much worse as always. See you guys tomorrow.

66 shares on Slack this month:

Saturday Night Fever, but it’s just me yelling, “Five, six, seven, eight!” while my cat lies down and refuses to participate.

48 shares on X this month:

Caffeine is not enough anymore, I need to chew on a power line.

87 shares on Threads this month:

Why are poets thinking that they are the ones tortured and not those who read their poetry?

28 shares on Threads this month:

I was 21 when I was 15, that’s why everything’s boring now.

34 shares on Facebook this month:

Netflix should’ve just maybe mailed us all this fight on DVD.

36 shares on Twitch this month:

You can always tell when someone is on a diet by how they scrape every last bit from that yogurt container.

74 shares on Telegram this month:

Fun prank: make people study for many years, and then don’t give them jobs.

66 shares on Threads this month:

Toddlers will take your last nerve, deep fry it and eat it for breakfast.

94 shares on X this month:

Oh I’m sorry, did the middle of my sentence interrupt the beginning of yours?

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

10 folks are currently checking 👀

I always say “it’s so expensive” and then buy it nonetheless.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Got out of jury duty yesterday by confessing to the crime.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m not lazy, I’m on power saving mode.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

I just paid my taxes. The roads should be fixed any day now.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Plot twist: weed is addicted to me.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

If I ever say “with all due respect”, please understand that there is none.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Called in, “I put the lime in the coconut and drank it all up.”

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Staying weird for my own sanity.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Think about how many more lovers you’d have if a cross country high-speed rail existed. That’s what they are taking away from you.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

That awkward shopping moment when someone is standing in front of the items you need and you pretend you’re shopping for something else because they just won’t budge.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

643 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,236

Funny Quotes Topics

17,359

Funny Quotes Images

15,236

Updated

Dec 30, 2025

Users Online

3,722

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇯 has bookmarked:

I’m naturally funny because my life is a joke.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has shared:

The police sent me a photo radar ticket so I sent them a photo of a hundred dollars, so I guess we’re even.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has viewed:

The difference between the kids table and the adults table during holiday dinners is that there is much more screaming, crying, and arguing at the adults table.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has copied:

Facebook: because time isn’t going to pass on it’s own.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has copied:

If life has taught me one thing, it’s that I need more money.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has bookmarked:

Looking forward to another year of crushing reality and unfulfilled dreams.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has downloaded:

I become someone I don’t recognize when I play Monopoly.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has shared:

You ever liked a song so much you restart it before it even finishes?

Someone from 🇦🇿 has bookmarked:

Just rolled over for a cuddle.. forgot I’m single… fell off the bed.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has shared:

Blocking people isn’t enough. I need their favorite TV show to get cancelled.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Instagram:

We get it, comma, you went to Oxford.

Freshly posted on X:

In a parallel universe, Mariah Carey is doing her shopping and is sick of hearing me on every store’s speaker system.

Trending via Slack:

They should invent a word for when you’re alive but not really living.

Shared recently on Instagram:

I find it sad that my universal remote does not control the universe. Not even remotely.

Shared recently on Instagram:

I’m officially at the age where I’m not upgrading my phone until it stops working.

Shared recently on TikTok:

Cops wake up Christmas morning excited as hell to ignore their family and go sit on the highway with a radar gun for 10 hours.

Going viral on Instagram:

“Pre” means before, and “post” means after. Using both at the same time would be preposterous.

Broadcasted on WhatsApp:

Elliott didn’t care about E.T. He just wanted a flying bike.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

Crossing things off my to-do list… I didn’t do them, I just don’t want them on my list anymore.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

I deal with my personal problems the same way I study for tests, I don’t.

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