Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇪 has copied:

Summer body? Folks, I’m cosplaying as a potato that’s seen some things.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has copied:

Seeing yourself on a FaceTime screenshot really humbles you.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has copied:

About 40 muscles are activated when you eat just one donut. Follow me for more fitness advice.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has copied:

I’m only an introvert until I meet people worth extroverting with.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has bookmarked:

The only reason I insist on returning to the office is because my cat needs a break from me staring at him all day.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has bookmarked:

Ain’t no girls in my messages, just a bunch of verification codes.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has bookmarked:

How do I get someone to unknow me? I no longer want to be known by these people.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has downloaded:

Imagine you go bowling by yourself and you go sit down, but it’s your turn again.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has copied:

It’s so hot here, I’m breaking a sweat just bitching and moaning about it.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has viewed:

It’s cool how seeing a less flattering photo of an attractive friend does not change my perception of them at all, but seeing one of myself makes me want to jump off a bridge.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,530

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on WhatsApp:

Sitting next to you on an empty train and clicking my stopwatch every time you turn a page in your book.

Just shared via Facebook:

“Full-time” should be 20 hours max, man. This is ridiculous. I’ve got other stuff to do.

Just shared via Telegram:

I hate when someone on a magazine cover stares at me while I eat.

Just shared via WeChat:

Telling my boss I wasn’t drunk really backfired. I probably should have waited until he asked.

Live now on Twitch:

Do you remember when you looked through binoculars upside down and everyone was really far away? That was nice.

Trending via LinkedIn:

I’m just impressed by how ugly I’m willing to look in public these day.

Just shared via Snapchat:

I caught my husband eating the last of the ice cream last night. First of all, we are supposed to be dieting together. Second of all, I was going to eat that.

Just shared via WeChat:

So tonight me and my phone are playing hide and seek. So far my phone is winning.

Just shared via Reddit:

I’ll stop smoking weed when life stops smoking me.

Breaking via Reddit:

Called in, “Taking a gap year.”

Funny scams quotes

Funny scams quotes bring a hilarious twist to the world of trickery and hustle 😂💸. They turn shady schemes into laugh-out-loud moments, proving that even scams can be entertaining when seen through a witty lens 😆🔍. Ready to giggle at the sneaky side of life? Dive into these clever quips that keep the laughs rolling while reminding us to stay sharp! 🤹‍♂️💬

New funny scams quotes 👇

All funny scams quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

92 shares on Telegram this month:

Could a mosquito drink blood out of a cup or something or are they legally required to Capri Sun my legs all summer?

46 shares on Reddit this month:

I used to think adulthood was one crisis after another. I was wrong. Multiple crises. Concurrently. All at once. All the time. Forever.

68 shares on Messenger this month:

Glad to be born at a time when I got to see what life was like before the internet, and will be dead before AI completely destroys humanity.

27 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Smithereens is the worst way to get blown.

25 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Seeing a beautiful woman drink her beer is like witnessing an angel take flight.

37 shares on Threads this month:

And then the vodka whispered, “Say what you really think.”

89 shares on Reddit this month:

I’d never pick the lesser of two evils because that means they’re not even good at being evil either.

63 shares on Telegram this month:

I hate the person I become when I try to open a package using the ‘Tear Here’ notch, and it stays sealed.

89 shares on LinkedIn this month:

The Masters would be a lot more interesting if there were starving alligators roaming throughout the golf course.

58 shares on Telegram this month:

I am under no obligation to make sense to you.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

13 folks are currently checking 👀

I love being a girly girl and going to sleep all moisturized, juicy, and soft. Lip balm on. Layering on scents just to beauty rest.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Sorry, I can’t tonight. I’m busy taking things personally.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Lazy is such an ugly word. I prefer to call it selective participation.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

A long time ago, being crazy meant something. Nowadays, everybody is crazy.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Get married and have kids so that you can Google things like “How to teach your kid to not bite”.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Sometime you meet such a prince that you’d rather marry the horse.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

I identify as a McDonald’s ice-cream machine because I go down when you really want me.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Sheep to the left of me. Cows to the right. Here I am. Stuck on a bus with a view.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

The collective noun for a group of narcissists should be an ‘egosystem’.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

By accepting their pardons, the turkeys are admitting guilt.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,677

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇪 has bookmarked:

I may not have lost all my marbles yet, but there’s a small hole in the bag somewhere.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has shared:

I get so flattered when butterflies or bees buzz around me. Like, sorry ladies, I’m not a flower, but it’s so sweet that you thought I was. Hehe.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has copied:

Only two things are certain: death, and Princess Diana’s face on at least one grocery store magazine.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has bookmarked:

Women don’t apologize. They sleep naked and let you decide whether you are still angry or not.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has downloaded:

You’re really hot. Wanna share microplastics?

Someone from 🇷🇼 has viewed:

Scared to go on dates, cause what if I find the one and never be able to be single again.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has shared:

Having no one to talk would get you a good sleeping schedule.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has bookmarked:

Had chicken and egg for dinner because I wanted to eat the whole family.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has downloaded:

It’s messed up that there are a million songs about love, but zero about hopping on a quick call with key stakeholders.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has downloaded:

I’m an ethical hater. My hate towards you is informed, balanced, and deeply nuanced.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Slack:

The only way to my heart is with a knife.

Trending via Twitch:

Double chins are better than double faces.

Trending via Facebook:

“You’re like if 9 a.m. on a Monday was a person.”

Just shared via Slack:

“I’m getting to an age where I realize I shouldn’t have laughed at my grandparents for having an ‘upstairs’ vacuum.”

Just landed via Discord:

I’m at the age where I won’t make eye contact with someone because they look like a “talker.”

Broadcasted on Twitch:

I’m a total go with the flow kinda person as long as the flow is meticulously scheduled well in advance and there are no mid-flow changes whatsoever.

Going bananas on Snapchat:

Elliott didn’t care about E.T. He just wanted a flying bike.

Seen just now on Facebook:

I hate apps that shut off your music when you open them, like how fu*king important do you think you are?

Just landed via WeChat:

So, technically, Moses is the first man to download files from the cloud using a tablet.

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

I have this epiphany every night that I need to turn it up a notch.

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