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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇲 has shared:

I can still drop it like it’s hot. It’s just a lot harder to pick it back up.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has copied:

I’m naturally funny because my life is a joke.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has viewed:

I am listening to Pharrell Williams’ smash hit song “Happy,” and understanding for the first time that it was truly intended to distress.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has viewed:

The smarter you are, the more important it is for you to figure out how to think less.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has bookmarked:

Gentle parenting is making sure your kids can’t hear what you say when you’re peeling a mango.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has copied:

Delete a letter of his name from your contacts every time he makes you upset. When his name’s gone, he’s gone. Hangman that boy.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has shared:

I don’t know how to flirt, but you can watch me eat fresh fruit in my sundress.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has shared:

Welcome to your 40’s. You now have a favorite vegetable peeler.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has shared:

Donuts have holes in them, just like acoustic guitars, but that’s pretty much where the similarities end.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has bookmarked:

You can do laundry every day and still be behind on laundry.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,479

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on LinkedIn:

Mocktails are awesome because they ask the question ‘how much could juice cost?’

Breaking via WeChat:

I can’t date until the curse is lifted.

Broadcasted on WhatsApp:

I’m not saying I’m messy, but if Copperfield knew what I can make disappear, he’d be jealous.

Going bananas on Telegram:

The collective noun for a group of reply guys is an audacity.

Shared recently on Reddit:

The collective noun for a group of narcissists should be an ‘egosystem’.

Making waves on TikTok:

Ain’t no way there’s billions of us and nobody got superpowers.

Going viral on Twitch:

This bouncer’s lucky I’m with my lady and physically frightened of him or he’d be in a world of pain.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

Americans are funny, man. “It’s 72 degrees outside.” Bro, I don’t speak oven.

Going viral on Messenger:

Urgh. Trying to buy a copy of Catch-22 online but the seller won’t post it until I’ve paid and I won’t pay until I’ve received it.

Freshly posted on Slack:

I’m never early… unless we’re talking about the airport.

Funny Wham quotes

Funny Wham quotes are the perfect way to add a splash of 80s charm and cheeky vibes to your day 🎤✨ Whether you’re a fan of their iconic beats or just love a good laugh, these playful lines will have you smiling and singing along in no time 😄🎶 Get ready to dance, chuckle, and maybe even strike a pose—Wham style! 💃🕺 #FeelGoodVibes

New funny Wham quotes 👇

All funny Wham quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

79 shares on Instagram this month:

Told someone I’m as “single as a pringle and as neato as a dorito” and they blocked me immediately.

74 shares on Facebook this month:

I hate when I accidentally blow all of my leaves into my neighbor’s yard.

29 shares on Twitch this month:

My child had pancakes and syrup for breakfast so I guess I’ll be sticking to my furniture for the next week.

80 shares on Discord this month:

Free marriage tip: Don’t ask your wife when dinner will be ready while she is mowing the lawn.

62 shares on Snapchat this month:

Thanks for leaving my door open; I was running low on houseflies.

14 shares on Twitch this month:

They are mad because you took that knife out of your back and used it to cut ties.

10 shares on Messenger this month:

I’ve decided to cut my carbs… into smaller pieces before eating them.

86 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Blocking me is like blocking the sun, the moon and the stars.

42 shares on Twitch this month:

Super excited for a brand new week of hoping for the best, but expecting the worst.

95 shares on Pinterest this month:

Every time I have to leave the house and be around people I remember why I hate having to leave the house and be around people.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

25 folks are currently checking 👀

The science between bragging about a man and him disappointing you immediately after needs to be studied.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Stages of Christmas shopping: 1. There’s plenty of time. 2. Oh no!

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Don’t ruin a good sundress by wearing panties.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Dads were right. Walking around with your hands behind your back and looking at everything around with a mild look of disgust and annoyance is so much fun.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

I miss whatever age I was when I thought five dollars was a lot of money.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

I hate when people ask me: “Why are you so quiet?” Because I am. That’s how I function. I don’t ask others, “Why do you talk so much?” It’s rude.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

I often choose gift bags instead of wrapping, not just out of laziness, but also because I have the fine motor skills of a drunken panda.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

IKEA products should be cheaper, I’m doing all the work here. It’s like ordering takeout food and still having to cook it when it arrives.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

I think the Monday after Sunday should always be a day off.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

I was talking to someone and combined “all good” and “no worries” by saying “all worries”, which was a lot more accurate.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,433

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇭 has shared:

I don’t even believe myself when I say I’ll be ready in 5 minutes.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has bookmarked:

Ghosting is actually a sign of great respect in my culture.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has shared:

The quality of clothing at retail stores today is quite literally the quality that Halloween costumes used to be.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has downloaded:

The prime minister is a minister that is not divisible by any other minister.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has bookmarked:

I used to sell furniture for a living. The trouble was, it was my own.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has copied:

Every room is a panic room if someone farts.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has bookmarked:

Adulting: unlocking life’s mysteries, one therapy session at a time.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has copied:

I miss them days if you couldn’t rap, you didn’t.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has copied:

If I walk into a girl’s house and she got like 50 plants, I know she’s a keeper because she already takes care of a bunch of useless things. What’s one more?

Someone from 🇩🇰 has shared:

Plants are like “I’ll have a light lunch.”

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Slack:

What’s a positive thought for beginners? I’ve been getting into optimism lately.

Trending via Reddit:

Fun fact: Malcolm X was not his birth name. He was originally Malcolm Twitter.

Just shared via Messenger:

You can make friends in a doctor’s waiting room as long as you have something broken and not something coughing.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

I wish someone would light up the way Siri does when I say, “Hey.”

Breaking via Threads:

Why do men always think “looking for fun” means sex? Wat if I want us to draw?

Just shared via LinkedIn:

How do couples who live together get anything done? I wouldn’t leave my bed if my girlfriend was in it.

Trending via Pinterest:

I’d tell you to go to hell, but I work there and I don’t want to see you every day.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

Married life: Telling your partner the same sentence 7 days in a row, only for him to say, “You definitely never told me that!”

Freshly posted on YouTube:

There’s a famous ancient Chinese proverb, but it’s written in Chinese so I have no idea what it says.

Just landed via Reddit:

Don’t ever get excited if your kid likes a new food. They won’t like it tomorrow.

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