Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Looking for a man who can handle my sass and sarcasm without breaking a sweat 🕶️💁‍♀️ Let's see if Prince Charming can handle this whirlwind of charm and chaos! 🌪️😜 #relationshipgoals"

annoy, difficult, expectations, getting, humor, i, man, me, nerf, relationship, want

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

About four minutes into my run, I’ve decided I want to work on my personality instead.

0

2 months ago

exercise, fitness, four, humor, i, minutes, motivation, personality, procrastination, run, running, self-improvement, want, work
I love cutting off Teslas. Like you may not let me merge over but your car sure as hell will.

0

2 months ago

automotive, car, cutting, driving, hell, humor, i, let, love, me, merge, merging, over, rage, road, road rage, sarcasm, sure, Tesla
Intermittent fasting is how I drive, not how I eat.

0

2 months ago

diet, drive, eat, fasting, fitness, health, humor, humor quote, i, intermittent, joke, lifestyle, sarcasm
I’m starting to think that the secret to having a happy life is avoiding people.

0

2 months ago

avoiding, avoiding people, happiness, happy, happy life, having, humor, introvert, life, people, secret, solitude, think
Just got my steps in by avoiding someone I know.

0

2 months ago

avoiding, exercise, humor, i, interaction, just, know, social, someone, steps
Unlocking new levels of iron deficiency.

0

3 months ago

anemia, deficiency, health, humor, iron, iron deficiency, joke, levels, new, nutrition

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

20 shares on YouTube this month:

My ex thinks I’m with someone else, someone else thinks I’m with my ex, everyone wonders where I am. Here I am. Just enjoying my own life.

19 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I wear a lot of clothes for someone who hates doing laundry.

19 shares on Messenger this month:

I don’t know who needs to hear this, but that much caffeine can’t be good for you.

34 shares on Twitch this month:

I am a person who wants to get a lot done, trapped in the body of a person who wants to sleep in and take naps at times.

26 shares on Facebook this month:

“I’ve been fantasizing about going back to bed since I woke up this morning.”

38 shares on Slack this month:

My diet was going really well until I woke up.

67 shares on Telegram this month:

What are some beginner pieces of information for somebody just getting into knowledge?

61 shares on YouTube this month:

Daffodil totally sounds like an insult, you blooming daffodil.

90 shares on Snapchat this month:

Sorry if I seem sad, I got a new long-sleeve shirt for fall, but I haven’t been able to wear it yet because it’s 94°.

86 shares on Twitch this month:

I’m so single, I have no one to drunk text.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇭 has copied:

I tried a onesome before, but I started catching feelings.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has shared:

Odd—my boss told me to meet him at the abandoned quarry at midnight for my performance evaluation.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has bookmarked:

What song lyric resonates with you the most? Mine is “we’re tiny, we’re toony, we’re all a little loony”

Someone from 🇨🇫 has viewed:

Never eat more than you can lift.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has viewed:

Grocery shopping before Christmas is a nightmare. My milk expired while I was waiting in line.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has bookmarked:

I hope none of the people I vowed to “help hide a body” ever actually need my help.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has copied:

I don’t assume anything except the fetal position.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has bookmarked:

For a guy supposedly called my “brother,” I’ve never seen him make broth even once.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has downloaded:

It was me, I let the dogs out.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has downloaded:

There should be an Amazon driver at the Mall during the holidays so adults can sit on their lap and tell them what they want.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via WhatsApp:

I have no idea how dishwasher tablets work. I’ve already taken five of them, and I still don’t feel like doing the dishes!

Freshly posted on Slack:

My mother always told me, “If you don’t have anything nice to say, say nothing at all.” Needless to say, I’m not much of a conversationalist.

Just shared via YouTube:

When I was a kid, we still ate noodles. Then at some point we ate pasta. Today, we only eat carbs.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

A gambler is only called an addict when he loses.

Shared recently on TikTok:

Trying to explain to my cat why she can’t jump off the balcony, even though I want to as well.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

Sorry if my posts have any typos, it’s because I’m driving.

Breaking via Instagram:

Delete a letter of his name from your contacts every time he makes you upset. When his name’s gone, he’s gone. Hangman that boy.

Shared recently on WeChat:

I’m so old, I used to cry as a child because I fell off my skateboard or bike, not because I didn’t have wifi.

Going bananas on Facebook:

Y’all liking my posts feels like a little forehead kiss.

Going viral on Facebook:

The same mosquito kept biting me last night. It probably thought it was at a wine tasting.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I want a man who doesn’t annoy me while I’m constantly getting on his nerves. It can’t be that difficult.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

About four minutes into my run, I’ve decided I want to work on my personality instead.

I love cutting off Teslas. Like you may not let me merge over but your car sure as hell will.

Intermittent fasting is how I drive, not how I eat.

I’m starting to think that the secret to having a happy life is avoiding people.

Just got my steps in by avoiding someone I know.

Unlocking new levels of iron deficiency.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨