We should make a new internet that’s as hard to use as the old internet was, so anyone that’s too stupid to have used the internet 20 years ago can’t get on it.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has shared:

The prettier you are, the weirder it gets.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has bookmarked:

You live in a great city when you get pooped on by a seagull instead of a pigeon.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has bookmarked:

Phew, I thought the weather was broken because there was this weird yellow thing in the sky. But all’s well, it’s raining again.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has downloaded:

If anyone wants to contact me, from now on I can only be reached via my bank account.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has bookmarked:

My youngest started kindergarten today and I cried, but mostly for his teachers.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has shared:

Brushing your teeth at night is a hellish chore. Walking from bed to bathroom feels harder than working in the mines all day. I’m getting pissed just thinking about it.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has shared:

Hello! I’m Britain’s greatest spy and my catchphrase is: I tell you my real surname, then my real forename, then my real surname again, in case you missed it.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has shared:

Me and my boys are broke, so we take turns taking pictures of one iced matcha.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has viewed:

I had no social life in high school. Even my imaginary best friend had a date for the prom.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has downloaded:

A hacker called me and said he had all my passwords. I got a pen and paper and said ‘Thank God for that, what are they?’