Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇼🇸 has copied:

My boss told me to show initiative, so I decided to finish work early.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has viewed:

For my next trick, I’ll need a divorce lawyer.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has copied:

“Your password is too weak!” Just wait until you see my impulse control.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has copied:

Needlenose in HR says we can’t use nicknames anymore.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has copied:

Women are so hot, I wish they were good people.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has copied:

If you see my account doing wild or out-of-character things, no worries. It’s not me, I routinely rent it out as an Airbnb.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has shared:

Twitter is like a mental hospital where everyone thinks they are the only sane person and everyone else is crazy.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has shared:

“Autophagy” would be a beautiful name for a girl.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has downloaded:

You ever have one of those days that require the use of both of your middle fingers?

Someone from 🇷🇸 has downloaded:

Graduation advice: Stay cool. Don’t be a fool. Avoid being a tool.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Feb 3, 2026

3,540

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Discord:

Reading a book and coming across a character’s name that you don’t know how to pronounce, so for the rest of the book, every time you see it, your brain just goes ‘skdjfkskakfk.’

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

Sometimes a little rudeness to establish that you don’t fancy nonsense is really important.

Going viral on Telegram:

Sorry, I laughed at your bad joke. I was trying to flirt.

Just landed via Snapchat:

The best way for me to stick to my diet is to go straight back to sleep after breakfast.

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

Don’t study, get slutty!

Going viral on YouTube:

Husband said he only wants to allow our kids to watch Looney Tunes and nothing else because of the “moral lessons”.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

I’ve realized that some people don’t like me, but I’ve also realized that I don’t give a shit.

Broadcasted on X:

My dog is quite vain. Whenever the doorbell rings, he thinks it’s for him.

Trending via Reddit:

I didn’t mean to gain weight. It happened by snaccident.

Shared recently on Discord:

Glasses don’t make you look smart, everyone knows you had to fail a test to get them.

Funny biologically quotes

Funny biologically quotes 🧬 bring a hilarious twist to the wonders of life and science! Whether you’re a bio buff or just love a good laugh 😂, these witty lines make complex concepts feel light and entertaining. Perfect for brightening up your feed or sparking a smile during study breaks 📚✨, get ready to see biology in a whole new, giggle-worthy way!

New funny biologically quotes 👇

Daily reminder that you’re biologically programmed to get laid, eat good food, connect with other humans, and enjoy yourself. Everything else is literally made up.

4 weeks ago

advice, biologically, biology, connect, connection, daily, eat, else, enjoy, enjoyment, everything, food, fun, good, human, human connection, humans, humor, laid, life, life advice, literally, motivation, reminder, yourself
Whenever someone asks me if my dog is adopted I respond with, “no, she’s biologically mine.”

4 weeks ago

adopted, biologically, dog, humor, i, me, mine, pet, response, someone, whenever

All funny biologically quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

47 shares on Telegram this month:

If I were in charge of Nike, I’d change the slogan to “Just Say You Did It. Nobody Ever Checks.”

96 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I was dropped as an adult.

19 shares on Facebook this month:

I suppose the supreme discipline for ninjas is sneaking up with flip flops.

32 shares on X this month:

Mom asked me what I was drinking the first time I got drunk and I said “breast milk” and now she’s not talking to me.

21 shares on Messenger this month:

Parents may forget many things, but they never forget who brought the noisy toys into the house.

96 shares on Slack this month:

I only like when it rains when I’m home.

43 shares on WeChat this month:

The sexual tension when everyone arrives at a 4-way stop at the same time.

60 shares on Threads this month:

I would like to unsubscribe from all responsibilities, please and thank you.

56 shares on Slack this month:

Your in his DMs, I’m on Etsy paying a witch to put a spell on him.

36 shares on X this month:

I’m not built to work, I’m built to brood in a castle with all my unread books.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Twitter is like talking to yourself in public and some random dude walking by agrees with you.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

I don’t need a fancy watch to tell me I’m not fit one bit.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

An app where you and your partner swipe left and right on restaurants until there’s a match. No talking, no negotiation. Who’s building this?

13 folks are currently checking 👀

My husband cleaned the kitchen for the first time in years. He’s in the living room, dressed in a suit, waiting for the award ceremony to commence.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Shaking my head like an Etch a Sketch to get my thoughts right.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

If one door opens when another door closes, your house is probably haunted.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

I have everything you could possibly ever need in my purse, except for money.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Feeling weird from my cookie-based diet.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

I need you to think about me 23/7. You get 1 hour a day for yourself.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

You don’t see guys traveling around on those seesaw-type push carts on railroad tracks anymore.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,741

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇺 has downloaded:

If i had $5 for every time I said up yours to someone, my butler would be saying it for me.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has shared:

Of course, my summer body is ready; it’s the same as my winter body but sweatier.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has bookmarked:

“Inconvenience is the cost of community,” I repeat to myself as I climb six flights of stairs for my friend’s birthday party for her cat.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has downloaded:

You’re the human embodiment of an “ugh.”

Someone from 🇩🇪 has viewed:

I have a great poker face because I have no idea what’s going on.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has shared:

Public transportation is great, but they should invent a type where it’s only me in the vehicle.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has copied:

I am a man, a man with a cold, so I guess this is goodbye.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has bookmarked:

Due to financial reasons, I will now be performing photosynthesis.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has shared:

Girl who is still crazy: I was crazy back then.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has copied:

Manifesting you in my bed.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Snapchat:

So annoying when your family knocks on the toilet door and asks what you’re doing. I’m baking a cake. HBU?

Going bananas on Discord:

As soon as the sun comes back out, I want a beer. It’s science.

Going viral on Reddit:

So sad. Elvis died before he could see the Lego movie. He woulda been like, ‘Mama, those blocks are movin’ and shakin.’

Breaking via Threads:

I’ve done literally nothing all day, except feel guilty about doing nothing all day.

Going viral on Messenger:

Telling the guy next to me on the subway that I’m not even ticklish, so don’t bother trying.

Trending via LinkedIn:

I get sad when I see how old people my age are.

Spotted on Facebook:

Used to wonder why my parents couldn’t grasp technology, but now, anytime I see something new, I’m like, “I’m not learning that.”

Spreading quickly via LinkedIn:

You can tell me what you want, but alcohol and eye contact are a dangerous combination.

Spotted on Snapchat:

Everyone you know is fighting battles you don’t know about, except for my neighbor who just can not shut up about his battles.

Making waves on Threads:

Why, as a hair, would you even wanna be ingrown. Like why are you doing that?

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