Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇬 has copied:

One day you’re cool and then the next, you realize your favorite pair of pants are sweatpants from the grocery store.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has downloaded:

Lord, grant me the serenity to accept the terms and conditions I do not read.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has viewed:

Hulk Hogan’s gone, so I’ll be ripping shirts and screaming “BROTHERRR!” at strangers in his honor.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has shared:

If you think my posts are ridiculous, you should see some of my life choices.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has downloaded:

Unlike the brain, the stomach alerts you when it’s empty.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has bookmarked:

Welcome to adulthood: you’re not hungover, it’s just Tuesday.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has viewed:

Sending messages is easy. Living with them forever is the hard part.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has viewed:

One of my favorite parts of grocery shopping is when somebody else does it for me.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has viewed:

I’m writing a book of obitchuaries for all the people who are dead to me.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has downloaded:

I really love playing chess with elderly people in the park, but it’s just really hard to find thirty-two of them willing to do it.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

241 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,510

Funny Quotes Topics

17,577

Funny Quotes Images

15,510

Jan 7, 2026

3,344

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Reddit:

Even at my most evil, I’m considerate.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

I hate it when some random company refers to me as their “customer.” I’m like, look, we had one night of drunken shopping, we are not in a relationship.

Live now on Reddit:

Someone from Facebook Marketplace is coming over to either buy the chairs I have for sale, or to murder me.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

If ads were a person, it would be that one neighbor who won’t stop talking to you at the most inconvenient of times.

Making waves on Slack:

Patience is for beginners. I’d rather freak out straight away!

Going viral on Discord:

Don’t ask me for work advice, I’m just going to tell you to quit your job.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

Man, these end times are taking forever.

Spreading quickly via Facebook:

Death doesn’t scare me, but a group of dogs fighting while I’m walking alone on the street does.

Seen just now on Twitch:

Asking the birds outside my window if they know any Metallica.

Making waves on TikTok:

Flies are literally obsessed with flying into a room, then pretending they can’t get out. Grow up.

Funny coffee maker quotes

Funny coffee maker quotes ☕️🤣 are the perfect blend of humor and caffeine vibes! Whether you’re a latte lover or an espresso enthusiast, these witty sayings add a splash of fun to your daily brew. Get ready to laugh out loud and sip with a smile because coffee isn’t just a drink—it’s a mood, a ritual, and sometimes, a hilarious conversation starter! 🎉🔥

New funny coffee maker quotes 👇

That little stroll to the coffee maker makes me happy every morning.

0

2 months ago

caffeine, coffee, coffee maker, daily, every, happiness, happy, joy, little, maker, me, morning, morning ritual, ritual, routine, small, small joy, walk

Someone from 🇪🇬 has recently bookmarked this quote.

109 shares on Slack this month.
They should make you watch a training video and pass a little test before you’re allowed to touch the office coffee maker.

0

2 months ago

before, coffee, coffee maker, humor, little, maker, office, pass, rules, should, test, touch, training, training video, video, watch, workplace

Someone from 🇦🇱 has recently shared this quote.

107 shares on Telegram this month.

All funny coffee maker quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

64 shares on TikTok this month:

I don’t simply want to kill a mosquito; I want to bite them back over and over to make them itch.

55 shares on Messenger this month:

Finally figured out why I look so bad in pictures – it’s my face.

34 shares on Reddit this month:

Іf you’re sad about being alone on Valentine’s Day, just remember that nobody loves you on any other day of the year either.

83 shares on Pinterest this month:

I want a chiropractor to crack my entire body like a glow stick.

53 shares on WeChat this month:

Baby, no job is ever that serious for you to be a work snitch.

30 shares on X this month:

Shout-out to my embarrassingly squeaky ass bed frame that makes me sound more popular than I actually am to my neighbors.

81 shares on YouTube this month:

Somebody just told me I was living the dream, I can assure you I have never dreamt of this shit right here.

37 shares on Slack this month:

It’s with a heavy heart and a deep sadness that I have to announce that I’m at work.

43 shares on X this month:

The days will soon be shorter again. Then it won’t rain for so long.

80 shares on X this month:

The thing about being 50+ is that whenever an opportunity to pee is available – you’re wise to take it.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

9 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m not saying I’ve aged like fine wine, but I am currently being stored in a dark place and avoiding sunlight at all costs.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Establish dominance at work by drinking iced tea in a wine glass.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

I love sarcasm. It’s like punching people in the face, but with words.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Hate when anxiety gives me stomach problems. Like, baby, you are supposed to be a mental disorder, please stay in your line.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

I am very depressed and in a really bad mood. Perhaps it will get better if I sit inside on a beautiful day and dwell compulsively.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

My favorite things about Texas are definitely toast and chainsaw massacres.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Interviewer: Why do you want to work in customer service? Me: Well, I’m really good at apologizing for things that aren’t my fault.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Get off the internet and go sniff a flower.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

If people love cheese so much, why are they mad when someone smells like cheese.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

The best weight you’ll ever lose is the weight of other people’s opinions.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

241 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,510

Funny Quotes Topics

17,577

Funny Quotes Images

15,510

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,585

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇷 has viewed:

I withdraw my argument. I didn’t realize you had a meme to back you up.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has downloaded:

I don’t always leave the house, but when I do, I shouldn’t.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has downloaded:

I woke up from a deep sleep in a panic thinking I was late for work. Thankfully, I was already there.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has shared:

It’s okay, wobbly chair, I’m unstable too.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has shared:

Hairless cats look like the devil screwed up a possession.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has downloaded:

Play the Grindr notification noise at Christmas dinner to see which conservative relatives panickedly check their phone ringer.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has bookmarked:

“Winter is literally the best season.” Okay, husky, go sit outside then.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has shared:

Awkward is the new sexy. At least that’s what I’m telling myself, so I don’t cry in front of strangers.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has downloaded:

This can’t be the same body that used to be able to stay up all night.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has downloaded:

You want me to go apple picking? The original sin?

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Reddit:

They should invent a “stay signed in” checkbox that isn’t meaningless.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

All I want is to live well and to die in a manner so bizarre and gruesome it can only be described with a German word.

Going viral on WeChat:

Sorry I’m late. Had to scroll back to my birth year.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

I need a vacation, but the kind where everyone else leaves, and I have my house to myself for a few days.

Shared recently on Facebook:

You know you’re getting old when you clean the house to the music you used to go out to.

Going bananas on Reddit:

I don’t like being asked “are you at home?” Please expand further so I can know whether I’m at home or not.

Going viral on Discord:

Welcome to your 40s: that “teenager”over there is actually 27.

Going viral on Instagram:

Britney Spears working at an ice-cream shop called ‘Scoops, I did it again.’

Going viral on Slack:

Imagine you’re living inside a tiny mushroom house… with a tiny chimney… deep in the woods… no one knows you exist… you make soup in a tiny pot… you are free.

Making waves on YouTube:

Maybe dogs are smarter than us because they found a way to get fed and housed without having to go to college and get a job.

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