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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇴 has shared:

I thought my wrinkles were finally getting smaller, but it turns out my eyes were just getting worse.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has shared:

A good hack to make my house look clean and tidy in the evening is to turn all the lights off.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has copied:

It’s important to remember that even parents make mistakes. In fact, it’s how many of us became parents.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has copied:

The difference between us is that people can peck you and I’m impeccable.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has downloaded:

I wish my midlife crisis made me want to get a gym membership and a revenge body, but instead I’m eating Snickers for breakfast in bed.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has downloaded:

Me, as a vampire: Tell me, mortal, have you had any alcohol in the last 24 hours?

Someone from 🇩🇰 has copied:

People shouldn’t be at the grocery store the same time as me. Get out of the way.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has viewed:

Asking the waiter for her phone number and then texting her “can I have more coffee?” two minutes later.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has downloaded:

Ever since I was a little girl, I knew I wanted to cancel plans.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has copied:

I’m the ick in fantastic.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,690

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Reddit:

I like to establish dominance by yawning the minute someone tries to make small talk with me.

Spotted on YouTube:

The human body requires so much maintenance. Who designed this thing?

Just shared via TikTok:

Running from your problems is cardio.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

I’m okay with being single. But at night, while I’m drunk, that’s too much.

Live now on TikTok:

Weird how I can’t seem to reach anything at the grocery store when hot men are around.

Broadcasted on Discord:

Public transportation is great, but they should invent a type where it’s only me in the vehicle.

Trending via LinkedIn:

If life could stop teaching me lessons, that would be great.

Trending via Snapchat:

I think one quality that makes me incredibly attractive is that I keep my mouth shut when I have nothing to say.

Breaking via TikTok:

At first I’m shy, then I’m a podcast.

Trending via Slack:

I brake for no one, except squirrels.

Funny confident quotes

Funny confident quotes are the perfect mix of sass and self-love 😎✨ They boost your mood, make you chuckle, and remind you to own your awesome with a wink 😉💪 Whether you’re strutting into Monday or just need a little pep talk, these witty gems bring the perfect combo of humor and boldness to your day 🎉🔥 Get ready to laugh out loud and feel unstoppable!

New funny confident quotes 👇

All funny confident quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

21 shares on Instagram this month:

Before the internet, people thought that there was only one idiot per town. We were so wrong.

29 shares on Messenger this month:

Getting older just means that you have to start eating all the sad foods.

76 shares on Telegram this month:

Last night my guardian angel came to me, covered me up, gave me a kiss on the forehead and whispered in my ear: “You’re a pain in the ass!”

89 shares on Pinterest this month:

There are a few certainties in this life: death, taxes and when a Canadian tells you it’s cold out, it’s cold out.

51 shares on WhatsApp this month:

It’s not you. Just the things you say, think, and do.

75 shares on Threads this month:

A gentleman opens doors and brings flowers. A man smacks your ass and pulls your hair. A soulmate does both.

75 shares on Telegram this month:

Wanna go back to my place and meow at each other?

32 shares on Threads this month:

Fake laughing at work is mentally exhausting. Please just leave me alone.

38 shares on Instagram this month:

Pornhub should do a wrap-up of your year like Spotify does.

42 shares on Facebook this month:

My doctor told me to watch my drinking. Now I drink in front of a mirror.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Saying “You’re tearing this family apart” whenever someone argues with me.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Everyone’s a gangster until they have to say sorry.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Super excited to not contribute anything worthwhile today.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Lego bricks are classic educational toys. You step on them once and you can do ballet.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Ladies, don’t date hungry guys. They’re just trying to get into your pantries.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Being a millennial means finding out you can’t afford to live in that apartment complex you thought was really shady when you were a kid.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

According to my chocolate advent calendar, there are only 4 days until Christmas.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

I didn’t believe in karma until I was scheduled to work at 6am on a holiday.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Nobody views your story faster than someone who doesn’t talk to you.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

My morning routine includes 10 minutes of sitting on my bed and thinking about how tired I am.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,445

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇬 has viewed:

One minute you’re young and fun, and the next, you’re turning down the stereo in your car to see better.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has bookmarked:

Yogurts should come in a five-pack, not a four-pack, or make the workweek four days.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has viewed:

I’m so good at sleeping that I can do it with my eyes closed.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has bookmarked:

Mercury retrograde: because adulting is hard, and sometimes you just need a celestial excuse.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has shared:

She’s a 10, but she says ‘Orwellian’ when it’s clearly ‘Kafkaesque”.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has viewed:

Very difficult being a full grown adult with a terrible fear of being “in trouble”.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has bookmarked:

The worst thing you can do when cleaning your house is “sit down for a minute.”

Someone from 🇸🇿 has shared:

Coolest part about starting a new job is the immunity to disease you get for 3 months till you get sick days.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has downloaded:

How was the word “Wife” invented? They took the first two and last two letters of wildlife.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has bookmarked:

Just saw the fattest bird. This guy must get up early as hell.

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Slack:

The world contains protons, neutrons, electrons, and morons.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

If you’re happy and you know it, you’re clearly not paying enough attention.

Going viral on TikTok:

I’m currently trying not to read anything about carbohydrates after 4pm.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

You’re not going to believe this, but I was doing really well, and then your email found me.

Making waves on Discord:

Never forget that your fave celebs were trying to sell you cartoon monkey pictures during a pandemic.

Seen just now on Reddit:

At the strip club sighing until one of the dancers asks me what’s wrong.

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

Just checked my bank account. Looks like everyone’s getting well wishes for Christmas.

Just landed via Reddit:

Yeah, sex is cool, but have you ever crawled out of the worst depression of your life and got your spark back?

Making waves on Threads:

It’s almost time to put winter tires on the struggle bus.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

The weather forecast should include the percentage of answers blowing in the wind.

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