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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇭 has viewed:

One interesting thing I learned in my thirties is that you can leave a bar before it closes.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has copied:

Day 12 without chocolate: Lost all hearing in my left eye.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has downloaded:

I recently discovered “movies.” They’re usually like an hour and a half long, and a pretty good way to kill time. Check it out.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has downloaded:

Hawk o the mornin tuah

Someone from 🇮🇹 has copied:

Smithereens is the worst way to get blown.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has bookmarked:

Been telling everyone, “It’s been a good year for horses.” No idea whether that’s true or not, but they keep nodding like it makes a lot of sense.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has viewed:

Sometimes I wonder what happened to the people who asked me for directions.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has viewed:

Not everyone realizes this, but if you clean the pile of receipts out of a purse and stack them together, it makes a teeny tiny book about why you’re broke.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has shared:

Hopefully it won’t be as bad as it already is.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has bookmarked:

First date idea: we search for each other’s criminal history together.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,495

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Discord:

White, black, yellow, brown, Democrat, Republican, man, woman, straight, gay, transgender, Jew, Christian, Muslim, young and old — you will all taste the same to the zombies.

Live now on YouTube:

I’m bad at being sad. Three minutes in, and I’m already making fun of my situation.

Seen just now on Reddit:

Eating nothing but beer for a month and calling that Oktoberfast.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

I want to be the kind of person who eats half a grapefruit for breakfast and runs every morning, but I also want to be happy.

Making waves on Messenger:

So stupid how New York is actually as cool as everyone says.

Just landed via Twitch:

You’re all using your crystals wrong. Put them in a sock and start swinging.

Trending via Telegram:

Is it a good sign when your therapist keeps saying Ka-Ching?

Freshly posted on WeChat:

My sleeping pattern ain’t even a pattern anymore, it’s a freestyle that’s on shuffle.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

I plan the silliest murders in my dreams because all I have to do to get away with it is wake up.

Broadcasted on LinkedIn:

Glory hole but for forehead kisses.

Funny dependence quotes

Funny dependence quotes bring a hilarious twist to the idea of leaning on others 🤣 Whether it’s about friendships, relationships, or just everyday habits, these witty sayings remind us that sometimes needing a little help isn’t so bad—and can be downright entertaining! 😂 Ready to laugh at the quirks of relying on others? Let’s dive into some clever and playful takes that will brighten your day and maybe even make you rethink dependence! 😜✨

New funny dependence quotes 👇

All funny dependence quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

67 shares on X this month:

My stress stresses me out to the point where I’m too stressed to deal with my stress.

51 shares on Twitch this month:

The real me comes out at midnight (it’s just me spending money online).

93 shares on YouTube this month:

Just learned in psychology that when a man goes to sleep first, it’s because he’s comfortable around you and wants you to go through his phone.

83 shares on Twitch this month:

I always figure it out on my own, I just need to panic first.

25 shares on Twitch this month:

Decorated the house across the street so I can look out the window and enjoy my handiwork.

82 shares on WeChat this month:

I feel like you’re allowed to start your day at 4 p.m. if you are pure of heart.

26 shares on Twitch this month:

I love being left to my own devices. It’s like yeah, these are my devices.

49 shares on TikTok this month:

Food is like sex: When you abstain, even the worst stuff begins to look good.

96 shares on Snapchat this month:

We always asked “where is Waldo” but never “who is Waldo hiding from”.

89 shares on Pinterest this month:

Me at a nightclub: Where are the chairs?

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

6 folks are currently checking 👀

A quick shoutout to all of the sidewalks out there… Thanks for keeping me off the streets.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

We are so shocked by “Butthead” that we ignore the strangeness of the name “Beavis”.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

I have almost 100,000 miles on my office chair. So I got that going for me.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

I haven’t broken a mirror lately, but my water broke and I’ve had seven years of kids crawling into my bed.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Note: Press the button on the elevator as often as possible to activate the secret express function and speed up the thing.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Sure, I could get off the couch today, but then what?

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Once my school teacher lectured me for unacceptable behavior. That’s 30 mins of sleep I am never getting back

14 folks are currently checking 👀

I recently saw a documentary about dinosaurs. They simply ate everyone they didn’t like. I like that concept.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

They should remove the sex scenes from movies and then put them all into one big super sex scene movie they can show in theaters at the end of the year.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Dress for the demons you want, not the demons you have.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,445

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇬 has shared:

Wake me when AI does housework.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has downloaded:

I’ve realized about a third of my life is spent trying to ignore the fact that I have to pee.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has viewed:

I really love how squirrels get extra chubby heading into winter mostly because it’s super relatable.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has downloaded:

Commenting “humiliation ritual” on a pic of my friend out with his family.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has viewed:

You’re in his DMs, I’m outside his window with a JBL speaker streaming Taylor Swift.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has copied:

Restaurants: put your phone down, live in the moment. Also, scan our QR code and browse our menu.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has bookmarked:

Wake me up when I’m rich!

Someone from 🇲🇪 has bookmarked:

I have officially reached the age where I am bothered by lights being on, doors left open, loud noises, and people.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has shared:

If I honk at this person, maybe it will make them a better person.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has copied:

Maybe the real American dream is the debt we collected along the way.

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on WeChat:

If I were to “picture everybody in the room naked,” I would be stunned and in awe of the beauty and diversity of the human form before me. But thanks for the advice.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

I can’t be bothered with people that can’t be bothered.

Making waves on YouTube:

There has been a British voice in my head saying, “Bit sad innit,” for the past few weeks.

Just shared via Twitch:

If you don’t have dating allegations with your best friend, you are not bestfriending hard enough.

Seen just now on Telegram:

I would rather lose you than the argument.

Trending via Pinterest:

Apparently, stress balls are not supposed to be thrown at people who are stressing you out.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

“You’re a cougar!” God forbid a woman gives back to the youth.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

My favourite yoga pose is the one where you lay really still and do nothing.

Spotted on Reddit:

People who live in glass houses should install frosted glass around the toilet part.

Seen just now on YouTube:

I want to save money, but all I’m saving are memes.

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