Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇷 has downloaded:

It took three employees to help me complete “self-checkout” yesterday.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has bookmarked:

If I’m reading my Twitter feed correctly, Jennifer Aniston killed JFK.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has shared:

I was blinded by a goddamn deer with a shiny red nose… No, officer, I haven’t been drinking.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has downloaded:

It’s funny how sometimes you buy a book, then read it in two days, and sometimes you buy a book, and it lives on your bookshelf for 12 years.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has copied:

Odd—my boss told me to meet him at the abandoned quarry at midnight for my performance evaluation.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has copied:

Why is it called the Super Bowl if no one is bowling?

Someone from 🇳🇮 has shared:

Think that’s enough todaying for today.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has bookmarked:

Drinking through a straw is the opposite of snorkeling.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has copied:

Does anyone know what to do, like in general?

Someone from 🇵🇰 has downloaded:

The inventor of autocorrect walked into a bar and ordered a bear.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

55 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,324

Funny Quotes Topics

17,443

Funny Quotes Images

15,324

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,610

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on YouTube:

Every time I blink, it’s Monday again. I can’t live like this.

Broadcasted on Twitch:

Hi, I’m online. Would you like to argue for an hour about whether a hotdog is a sandwich?

Just shared via Slack:

I think the world is ready for a fat James Bond.

Seen just now on Threads:

Made the mistake of believing what I was told again.

Spotted on Snapchat:

I wanna meet the person whose parents are super disappointed he went to medical school instead of becoming a stand-up comedian.

Live now on X:

I was gonna brush up against you like a cat, but whatever, bro.

Just landed via Pinterest:

The day your kids stop waking up early on the weekend is the same day your body stops letting you sleep in.

Freshly posted on Slack:

You don’t get much engagement? Have you tried being retarded.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

I’ve been following this strict diet all week and so far all I’ve lost is my patience.

Seen just now on TikTok:

We need a slur for people who use ChatGPT.

Funny details quotes

Funny details quotes bring out the charm in the little things that make life hilariously unforgettable 😂✨ From quirky observations to clever twists, these gems turn everyday moments into laugh-out-loud memories 🤪🎉 Ready to spot the humor hiding in plain sight? Get ready to smile, giggle, and maybe even snort with these witty takes on the tiniest details! 😆💬

New funny details quotes 👇

All funny details quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

66 shares on WeChat this month:

No, it’s totally fine, Grandma. Nobody else needs to use the stairs today.

77 shares on Threads this month:

Starting to think I’m single because of everyone else’s shortcomings.

25 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Some things are better left unsaid, which I usually realize after I say them.

33 shares on TikTok this month:

If you’re curious what the priciest item in a store is just bring a kid along because they’ll definitely find then break it.

32 shares on Twitch this month:

My wife and I are going to quit our jobs and travel until we run out of money. I estimate we’ll be home around 9 p.m. tonight.

81 shares on WeChat this month:

“I’m great at saving money, as long as I don’t go anywhere, see anyone, or open my eyes.”

35 shares on Snapchat this month:

If you take a social media sabbatical, don’t announce it. Just make your last post something fun like “I wonder if there’s a bear in this cave?”

79 shares on Threads this month:

Our parents just don’t know how far we rode the bikes when we were young.

60 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I successfully avoided the red-eye flight and got the much milder pink eye flight.

17 shares on Slack this month:

There should be a withering shamrock emoji so that people can express misfortune or Irish grief.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

14 folks are currently checking 👀

As a dad, you’re required to ask your neighbor “You gonna do mine next?” when you see them raking leaves.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

You know what part I love about waking up? None of it. Let me sleep!

6 folks are currently checking 👀

“You’re a cougar!” God forbid a woman gives back to the youth.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Technology has gone too far, man. My roommate is logged out of his lightbulbs because he forgot his password.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Only DM me if you like disappointment.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

You are not obligated to post a video of yourself dancing.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

I used to be able to eat whatever I wanted without gaining weight. Now I pick up a fork and gain seven pounds.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Being annoying is the most beautiful thing a woman could be.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m just so lazy because I’m still recovering from the fact that I used to be the fastest sperm.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Me before grocery shopping: only healthy foods, no impulse buys, I can do this. Me during grocery shopping: they make chocolate filled marshmallows?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

55 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,324

Funny Quotes Topics

17,443

Funny Quotes Images

15,324

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,270

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇩 has viewed:

My hobby is misidentifying dinosaurs so my daughter can correct me.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has shared:

If the line at the grocery store takes longer than 10 minutes, the candy beside the checkout should be free.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has bookmarked:

The best time to visit Japan is when you have money!

Someone from 🇹🇴 has copied:

I’m full of rage, but in a very chill and nonchalant way.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has downloaded:

What if AirPods had tongues and they started licking the inside of your ears to indicate they’re low on battery?

Someone from 🇲🇷 has bookmarked:

I’m almost finished reading your tweet. Love it so far.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has copied:

The ’90s were a time of blissful ignorance where we expected rock stars to sleep with groupies.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has shared:

Really love how dancing alone in your room can literally save your life.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has copied:

Tonight I wanted to stop drinking but then I remembered the owner of the pub has a family to feed.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has shared:

I call my period Shark week. I want to eat everything, I’m snapping at people, I feel huge, people are scared of me, and there is blood everywhere.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Pinterest:

Some people change their faces like traffic lights change their lights.

Live now on X:

Going viral on X is like winning a lotto during the apocalypse.

Spreading quickly via LinkedIn:

Ever since I was little, I knew I wanted people to watch how they speak to me.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

The best part of the relationship is before you meet them, and you’re single.

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

I feel bad for Slash. He bought a goofy hat in like 1986 and now he has to wear it until the day he dies.

Trending via LinkedIn:

I’m writing a book of obitchuaries for all the people who are dead to me.

Just landed via Instagram:

It’s truly insane when bosses assume their employees are working for any reason other than a paycheck.

Just shared via YouTube:

You think you’re your own worst critic? Just wait till you have kids.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

Sometimes I need a break from myself but it’s like, ugh, everywhere I go there I am.

Broadcasted on Twitch:

Bitcoin is just Kohl’s Cash for boys.

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