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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from πŸ‡ΊπŸ‡¦ has copied:

Sometimes I’m just so exhausted I have to go to bed and scroll my phone for the next 2-3 hours.

Someone from πŸ‡§πŸ‡¬ has bookmarked:

The unemployed urge to say I love you during a job interview.

Someone from πŸ‡ΈπŸ‡Ύ has downloaded:

β€œAre you seeing anyone,” like hallucinating?

Someone from πŸ‡¨πŸ‡« has viewed:

There should be an opposite of Valentine’s Day where you post Instagram photos of your enemy.

Someone from πŸ‡¬πŸ‡² has viewed:

I’m running out of people I like.

Someone from πŸ‡¨πŸ‡¦ has shared:

A real smartphone would know when to shut up.

Someone from πŸ‡ΉπŸ‡± has copied:

The longest drum solo was 10 hours and 26 minutes and was performed by the child sitting behind me on a flight from LA to Tokyo.

Someone from πŸ‡ΈπŸ‡³ has viewed:

After all these years, Jude Law has finally noticed me and responded to my love letters. Something about staying 500 feet away. I’m getting it framed.

Someone from πŸ‡§πŸ‡Ώ has viewed:

If you were the birthday gift I bought my daughter 3 months ago, where would you be hiding?

Someone from πŸ‡³πŸ‡ͺ has copied:

They should invent a word for when you’re alive but not really living.

Funny Quotes Data πŸ€“

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 20, 2026

Users Online

3,647

Social Media Log πŸ’«

Just shared via LinkedIn:

Heard a recording of my own voice, and now I can never speak again.

Going viral on Slack:

I appreciate the sun for always moving in the sky in a predictable way but I also respect the moon for just kind of doing whatever.

Seen just now on Messenger:

You ever feel awkward in Target, cause you know you belong at Walmart.

Trending via Telegram:

Job interviewer: “Where do you see yourself in 5 years’ time?” Me: “My greatest strength is that I’m a good listener.”

Spotted on WeChat:

Movie date at my house, but we use pirated sites and spend all night closing pop-ups.

Shared recently on TikTok:

Have you ever just restarted the dryer because you didn’t feel like folding the clothes yet?

Breaking via Slack:

Life hack: put on an apron at home and people think you’re super busy doing important stuff even when you’re not.

Shared recently on TikTok:

I was sad, but then I ordered some new clothes. I’m okay now.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

I am so out of shape right now, that if someone yelled β€œrun for your life!” I’d be like β€œya’ll go ahead, I’m meetin’ Jesus today!”

Freshly posted on Threads:

My boss wants me to train some other employees so it’s pretty obvious he has no idea I am completely incompetent.

Funny humor expression quotes

Funny humor expression quotes bring a burst of laughter πŸ˜‚ and brighten up any day 🌟! Whether you’re feeling silly πŸ€ͺ or just need a quick mood boost β˜€οΈ, these witty gems are perfect for sharing smiles πŸ˜„ and spreading good vibes πŸ’¬. Get ready to giggle, grin, and maybe even snort with joy πŸ½β€”because humor is the best kind of expression!

New funny humor expression quotes πŸ‘‡

All funny humor expression quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes πŸ‘Œ

Funny Quotes Collections
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Social Media Stars ⭐

50 shares on LinkedIn this month:

My wife has a weird habit of starting conversations by saying, “Are you even listening to me?”

66 shares on YouTube this month:

I’m already cold. I know me and my low iron ain’t gonna survive winter.

48 shares on Messenger this month:

As a man, it’s my job to mistake kindness for flirting.

62 shares on Twitch this month:

Coding: Where incessantly talking to yourself seems completely normal and debugging is like being a detective in a movie where you are both the detective and the perpetrator.

53 shares on YouTube this month:

I got bills. They’re multiplying.

24 shares on Twitch this month:

Life is like a game of chess. I don’t enjoy it very much.

73 shares on Pinterest this month:

I always preferred the English spelling of “diarrhea” which is “diarrhoea” because it really looks like you’ve lost control of your vowels.

47 shares on Threads this month:

I feel like this holiday season, it’s important to remind people of the true meaning of Christmas: ghosts terrorizing rich people in the middle of the night until they agree to pay their employees more.

100 shares on Pinterest this month:

A lot of people think you need a lot of money to buy clothes. And they’re right.

40 shares on Reddit this month:

I’m glad it’s not snowing. I can’t imagine shoveling snow in this heat.

Trending Topics πŸ“

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes πŸ’₯

22 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

The inventor of archery: Man, I really wanna stab that guy over there.

25 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

Been getting really into nothing.

16 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

I did nothing wrong. I tried to do nothing and did it wrong.

12 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

Workplace Wrapped: you had 60k minutes of meetings this year that could’ve been an email.

15 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

I wish I loved exercising as much as I love not exercising.

22 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

This family has a lot of nerve wearing all these clothes after I just did laundry.

15 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

I’ve mastered farting, and it be loud and quick, but the key is don’t make a face or look around, so people can’t pinpoint it to you. Just act natural.

9 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

I thought being an adult meant cake for breakfast, not budgeting for therapy.

22 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

I’m a simple person. All I need in life to be happy is to have everything go my way and work out how I want it to.

18 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

I wish tree puns were more poplar.

Funny Quotes Data πŸ€“

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 20, 2026

Users Online

3,280

Activity Log ✨

Someone from πŸ‡¬πŸ‡² has bookmarked:

Nobody rots in bed like I do.

Someone from πŸ‡²πŸ‡³ has copied:

If you feel depressed, go for a run. You will soon find out your physical health is far worse than your mental health.

Someone from πŸ‡¦πŸ‡· has downloaded:

She doesn’t want flowers, she wants to invoke an ancient curse.

Someone from πŸ‡¦πŸ‡· has viewed:

Putting sunscreen on kids feels like cardio.

Someone from πŸ‡²πŸ‡Ό has downloaded:

The hottest thing a man can do is exactly what he said he was going to.

Someone from πŸ‡ΈπŸ‡° has bookmarked:

The most avoided species of shark is the Loan.

Someone from πŸ‡―πŸ‡² has copied:

I’m at the β€œbuy bigger jeans” part of my Eat. Pray. Love. journey.

Someone from πŸ‡¦πŸ‡« has copied:

Some people feel like unpaid actors in my sitcom called β€œWhat Fresh Chaos Is This?”

Someone from πŸ‡ͺπŸ‡Ή has downloaded:

My ideal vacation would be to drop my family off at the airport and then have a week of peace and quiet.

Someone from πŸ‡©πŸ‡° has bookmarked:

I tried to scream into the abyss today but got a busy signal.

Social Media Log πŸ’«

Breaking via Snapchat:

β€œI’m not ordering fries, I’ll just eat some of yours!” -Former friends of mine

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

I’m neither a lover nor a fighter. I’m a snacker.

Live now on Discord:

The prettier you are, the weirder it gets.

Freshly posted on Discord:

Explain it to me like I’m five then do it for me like I’m one hundred.

Breaking via Snapchat:

If paying a cashier a living wage will make prices go up, why doesn’t replacing cashiers with self-checkouts make prices go down?

Spotted on Slack:

Life hack: give yourself 8 to 12 hours of alone time in the morning to mentally prepare for the day.

Going viral on TikTok:

Today is one of those days where I have to remind myself that you’re not allowed to strangle people.

Going viral on X:

Pretty annoying when someone unfollows me before I can conduct their exit interview.

Broadcasted on Telegram:

Honestly, how women are drawn in a manga is typically (though not always) a good clue for what demographic a manga series is.

Just shared via Slack:

Yes, I was behind the DJ booth, but only as a cultural anthropologist.

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