Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇪 has bookmarked:

When people give me directions and they’re like “you can’t miss it,” I’m like, “Oh, you do not know what I’m capable of.”

Someone from 🇻🇪 has copied:

If it’s one thing we’ve learned hiking, it’s the early bird that gets the face full of spiderwebs.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has viewed:

It’s beginning to cost a lot like Christmas.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has downloaded:

There should be a website where you post your wishes, and rich people who don’t know what to do with their money give you an anonymous gift.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has bookmarked:

Why there is always a kid crying when I go to the store? Dude, you aren’t the one paying for it. Stop!

Someone from 🇴🇲 has downloaded:

I was living in the moment until I was evicted.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has shared:

Showering & getting in bed is literally one of the best combos ever.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has downloaded:

Christmas lights: the only thing bright around here besides my personality.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has copied:

My dog understands several human words. I don’t understand any dog barks. He may be smarter than me.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has downloaded:

Waking up early is cool until it starts feeling like you’ve had a long day at 10 a.m.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,371

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Discord:

How did the person who invented the spelling of “banana” decide when to stop?

Making waves on Instagram:

The 69 obsession turning into 67 is a recession indicator.

Broadcasted on X:

I can’t be the only one who screenshots confirmations, even though you’ll get an email and text.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

I get sad whenever they’re mean to Zoidberg in Futurama.

Making waves on X:

Remember the good old days when you didn’t have to wonder if the person messaging you was a bot or not?

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Blocking anyone who tries to motivate me.

Breaking via YouTube:

Everyone’s a badass until the doorbell rings.

Going viral on YouTube:

I wonder how much this “Never mind, it’s only 10 bucks” has already cost me?

Trending via X:

Welcome to your 50s, where coffee is the new happy hour and mornings are the new hangover.

Breaking via Pinterest:

Girl, if the moon can block the sun, then you can definitely block your ex.

Funny meteor quotes

Funny meteor quotes 🌠 bring a spark of humor to the cosmic chaos! Whether you’re stargazing or just love a good space pun, these witty lines will make falling stars 🌟 even more entertaining. Ready to laugh your way through the galaxy? Let’s dive into some stellar jokes that are truly out of this world! 🚀😂

New funny meteor quotes 👇

All funny meteor quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

42 shares on Slack this month:

If you meet me and I’m talking to myself, just keep walking. I’m self-employed and I’m in a meeting with senior management.

79 shares on Snapchat this month:

I’m at the “buy bigger jeans” part of my Eat. Pray. Love. journey.

61 shares on X this month:

I’m only staying up until midnight on New Year’s to watch that bloody year die.

42 shares on X this month:

The difference between a biography and an autobiography is self-explanatory.

71 shares on YouTube this month:

Nothing messes up your Friday like realizing it’s only Thursday.

23 shares on Telegram this month:

I speak my mind, cause it hurts when I bite my tongue.

63 shares on TikTok this month:

It sucks when you realize it’s only Thursday, until you realize it’s Wednesday.

82 shares on YouTube this month:

Nobody gets angrier than a man being accused of something he actually did.

10 shares on WhatsApp this month:

My boyfriend always complains that I never smile, but he’s the one who wanted a serious relationship.

48 shares on Facebook this month:

Be bold, be italic, but never regular.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Remember when you were a kid, you slept on the couch and without saying anything you found yourself in your bed. Now you sleep in your bed and if you say anything, you end up on the couch.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

I’d tell you to go to hell, but I work there and I don’t want to see you every day.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

You ever been in the middle of a conversation and realized this is why you avoid people?

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Monday is already sending me threatening glances from across the room.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

No, it’s fine. I watched some cartoons and now I feel a little more at ease with your stupidness.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

A man will beg you to take him back just to act right for 5 days and 24 min.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Receipts are like: Take this tiny piece of paper home with you and throw it away.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

If anyone wants a more cost effective energy provider, I can supply endless energy on tap from my absolutely not tired child at bedtime.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

I thought I liked seeing movies, but it turns out I like eating candy in a dark room where it’s illegal to talk to me.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

My nickname in high school was “who?”

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,339

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇿 has downloaded:

I’m gonna dress how I want this summer, and if you think I’m fat, well, so do I.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has bookmarked:

“Ooh, you’ve caught the sun.” Translation: You look like you’ve been swimming in a volcano.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has shared:

I’ve decided that I need to eat more vegetables, so I’m gonna make a carrot cake later.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has shared:

This Thanksgiving, don’t ask me questions about my life, just pass the mashed potatoes.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has shared:

Sticking googly eyes on a potato and introducing him to everyone as my new boyfriend.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has shared:

My phone is on Do Not Disturb because I am disturbed enough as it is.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has viewed:

I think more people would actually heal from their trauma if they got revenge.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has shared:

Hey (threateningly), can I join your years-old, tight-knit, close friend group?

Someone from 🇦🇲 has bookmarked:

Why the hell is my laundry bin always full? I’m not even going anywhere.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has bookmarked:

Headed to a wedding but my wife said I’m not allowed to refer to the bride as ‘the veiled threat.’

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Facebook:

Sex is cool but have you ever had your bed all to yourself.

Going viral on Pinterest:

Follow me on Instagram if you want to see me post absolutely nothing for weeks.

Shared recently on Discord:

My company promotes diversity. We’d never hire twins.

Live now on LinkedIn:

Whenever someone tells me how well behaved my kids are, I say it’s cause they’re not at home.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

I fractured my laziness and dislocated my interest.

Live now on Telegram:

Why touch grass when you can touch ass?

Spotted on WhatsApp:

Aliens probably lock their doors when they fly past Earth.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

When I don’t have money, I stop talking to women out of respect.

Breaking via Instagram:

I tried to act normal once, worst five minutes of my life.

Spotted on YouTube:

Reverse cowgirl so I can post selfies.

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