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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇩 has bookmarked:

Taking the day off to brush up on conspiracy theories and really get this Thanksgiving party started.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has copied:

An adventure and a dragon would cure me.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has bookmarked:

Unfortunately, I’m gonna have to cancel my appointment at a sperm bank. I will just call them and say I can’t come.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has copied:

If you’ve seen one shopping centre, you’ve seen a mall.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has copied:

A lot of y’all don’t understand politics because your history teacher was the football coach.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has viewed:

I tried to scream into the abyss today but got a busy signal.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has copied:

I’m actually pretty attractive, if you don’t compare me to anyone, ever.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has viewed:

Just googled “insanity” over and over but was expecting different results.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has viewed:

Where do I sign up to be one of those influencers with 2M followers whose whole thing is just standing in front of other people’s content and nodding?

Someone from 🇦🇷 has shared:

Just give your kids the iPad. They’re the ones who’ll be fighting cyborgs in the future.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2435 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,597

Funny Quotes Topics

15,266

Funny Quotes Images

12,597

Updated

28 minutes ago

Users Online

3,462

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Snapchat:

“Tom Cruise does his own stunts!” Okay cool, but so do I.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

The main reason I got divorced was cause I got married.

Breaking via Facebook:

Being single is so crazy. What do you mean there’s No One?

Spotted on TikTok:

My phone went from fully charged to 10% while I was sleeping, so I guess it leads a more exciting nightlife than I do.

Spreading quickly via Discord:

The concept of a drive-by doesn’t really exist in the swamp biome; instead, people rap about doing bog-emerges.

Reported on LinkedIn:

Sorry I’m late. Had to scroll back to my birth year.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

Nobody supports you like that one internet friend you’ve never met.

Making waves on Snapchat:

God invented war so that Americans can learn geography.

Going viral on Facebook:

When Dr. Seuss wrote, “Oh, The Places You’ll Go,” he did not consider how comfortable my couch would be.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

Dogs can’t talk and everyone loves them. Coincidence? I think not.

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Funny overpriced quotes

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2435 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,597

Funny Quotes Topics

15,266

Funny Quotes Images

12,597

Updated

28 minutes ago

Users Online

3,462

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇭 has bookmarked:

Some stupid little amoeba decided to leave the ocean a billion years ago and now I have to worry about Monday.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has shared:

I yelled at my cat and the other cats yelled at me. Like wow, okay, pay my mortgage then.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has downloaded:

When a door closes in life, sometimes it’s better to grab a hammer and nails and make sure the damn thing stays shut.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has copied:

I am not someone you have to host if you invite me, because I will have canceled.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has copied:

The golden rule of three beverages: one to hydrate, one to caffeinate, and one to celebrate.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has bookmarked:

Long sandwiches should have suitcase handles.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has copied:

If I like cleaning? Does Sisyphus like his boulder?

Someone from 🇷🇼 has copied:

You have never experienced true fear until a poster falls off the wall in the middle of the night.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has bookmarked:

Is Mercury in reggaeton?

Someone from 🇦🇹 has downloaded:

If I’m wrongly accused of a crime, I’m going to prison. I’m way too introverted to have an alibi.

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on WeChat:

A web developer and an SEO expert walk into a bar, bars, nightclub, pubs, tavern, beer, alcohol, drinks, alcoholic beverages, bars in my area, places to drink.

Going viral on Discord:

After smartphones, we never got pictures of Bigfoot anymore. You know why? That’s right: 5G killed all the Bigfoots.

Making waves on Messenger:

A fun wedding bit is to sit next to a random guest, point to the bride or groom & whisper, “it should’ve been you”

Spreading quickly via YouTube:

God, on inventing the tiger: “Okay, so this is going to be some kind of cat that likes to eat Frosted Flakes.”

Spreading quickly via Pinterest:

Look, babe, I’m sorry. If your fake British accent keeps being this geographically inconsistent, I’m going to have to cancel the medieval roleplay sex.

Seen just now on Reddit:

Lasagna has never broken my heart. Just saying.

Trending via WhatsApp:

I can usually cope with the opinions of others because I don’t listen.

Spreading quickly via Messenger:

Gordon Ramsay is making us dinner. It’s a four curse meal.

Breaking via LinkedIn:

What was the name of the boat in Titanic?

Making waves on Telegram:

Did you seriously just pique my interest?

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