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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇿 has bookmarked:

This Monday is Mondaying like it’s never Mondayed before.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has viewed:

Someone yelled “hey, retard!” and I looked back.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has copied:

I thought my wrinkles were finally getting smaller, but it turns out my eyes were just getting worse.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has downloaded:

Pouring Diet Coke directly into my gunshot wound.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has downloaded:

Headache pro-tip: Bang your toe into something.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has shared:

Shoutout to coughing on the bus. Haven’t tried it myself but seems really popular.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has bookmarked:

I love saying “why would I lie” when I’m lying.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has shared:

I refuse to go to a blood bank. I’m not taking your blood money.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has bookmarked:

Interviewer: So why do you want this job? Me: I don’t. I just need money.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has shared:

I used to think I was indecisive, but I’m not so sure anymore.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

234 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,503

Funny Quotes Topics

17,569

Funny Quotes Images

15,503

Updated

Jan 6, 2026

Users Online

3,564

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via YouTube:

If I wore a mood ring, it would probably explode immediately.

Trending via WeChat:

Forced to say “it’s okay” instead of throwing a chair at them.

Going viral on Facebook:

I can’t believe she picked her husband, her boyfriend and her other boyfriend over me.

Spotted on Threads:

My ego is bruised so I’m going to ice it with some cold beer.

Seen just now on Telegram:

Sometimes I just want a man to talk to me in the same voice he uses to talk to his dog.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Interviewer: Give an example of a difficult scenario and how you handled it. Me: I poured a bowl of cereal but had no milk, so I used ice cream.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

Handing over my ID at the post office. The clerk said, “You’ve aged quite a bit since this photo was taken.” I said, “Yes, I had it taken just before I joined this queue.”

Going bananas on WhatsApp:

People would be more motivated to lose weight if the weight they lost went on to someone they didn’t like.

Just landed via Snapchat:

Technically, all the money I have ever spent on food has been flushed down the toilet.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

I don’t need to touch grass, I need to touch one million dollars cash.

Funny unloading quotes

Funny unloading quotes bring a burst of laughter to the often tiring task of unloading 🚚💪 Whether you’re moving, unpacking, or just clearing out, these witty lines turn heavy lifting into lighthearted fun 😂🎉 Get ready to smile, chuckle, and maybe even share some giggles with friends as we dive into the quirkiest takes on unloading life’s little burdens! 📦😄

New funny unloading quotes 👇

All funny unloading quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

21 shares on X this month:

Non-alcoholic beer is like a vibrator without batteries: it fills you up nicely but without the buzz…

35 shares on Snapchat this month:

I’m just falling in love with my problems now. Maybe they’ll leave me too.

99 shares on Telegram this month:

They get real weird at the gun store if you walk in crying and asking for “the biggest one”.

99 shares on Reddit this month:

I didn’t believe in karma until I was scheduled to work at 6am on a holiday.

100 shares on Pinterest this month:

I was going to warn my kids about the repercussions of drugs and alcohol until I realized that they in fact were the repercussions of drugs and alcohol.

71 shares on WhatsApp this month:

It’s hard to believe that this long, crazy election will finally be over in a few months.

52 shares on YouTube this month:

It’s like winter is mad and keeps storming out, then coming back yelling ‘and another thing!’

79 shares on Discord this month:

If you can’t say anything nice, say something funny.

44 shares on Twitch this month:

We should put a tariff on being mean to me.

15 shares on Instagram this month:

I’ve got 50 minutes to make it look like I’ve been flossing for the last 6 months.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Every Friday, I’m like, “This weekend I’m getting my life together,” and then… I don’t.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

I showered with my boyfriend. My breasts have never been so clean! Wow!

22 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m a Leo so I just eat the other astrological signs.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

There aren’t enough hours in the day for me to do absolutely nothing.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

I was just viciously body shamed by my mirror.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

They call it a coffin because they’re finally coughing up that inheritance.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

My new pajamas have no pockets. I don’t want to hear your problems.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m gonna build a pirate ship and sail the high seas. Who’s coming with?

14 folks are currently checking 👀

“Stop overthinking.” Oh, wow. Hadn’t considered that. Solved.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

AI is that friend who is always there for you but gives terrible advice.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

234 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,503

Funny Quotes Topics

17,569

Funny Quotes Images

15,503

Updated

Jan 6, 2026

Users Online

3,661

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇽 has downloaded:

Why is judge the only job where you can bang a little hammer to make people shut up? I’ve needed that in literally every job I’ve had.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has copied:

The weather forecast should include the percentage of answers blowing in the wind.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has bookmarked:

No camera can do justice to a landscape that melts your heart.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has shared:

The idiot’s diet is just biting your tongue.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has copied:

The worst part about getting sucked up by the tornado you’re filming is to die knowing your wife was right. You are an idiot.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has viewed:

I don’t understand baby oil. What are we greasing up all those babies for?

Someone from 🇧🇳 has downloaded:

Some nights I stay up hella late just farting.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has viewed:

I’ve just found my wide pants again. They weren’t gone at all, they’re just my tight pants now.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has shared:

I don’t always cook dinner but when I do, I use every pan in the kitchen.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has viewed:

My hair dryer is so powerful that it doubles as my leaf blower.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Slack:

The heels stay on during sex because I only painted the toe nails that were showing.

Going viral on YouTube:

Sorry, but if you’re walking slower than me on the sidewalk, you’re my enemy. Walking faster than me? Also my enemy. Now if you’re walking at the same speed as me… hmm, yeah, I’m thinking enemy.

Just landed via Messenger:

Nothing good happens on the credit card after midnight.

Just landed via Reddit:

Promising I won’t tell anyone your secret doesn’t include my husband. He’s basically my diary.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

I have no idea how people meet at the gym. I turn into a disgusting, angry swamp witch every time I exercise.

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

Dress for the demons you want, not the demons you have.

Spotted on WeChat:

For the record, I use a turntable.

Just landed via Snapchat:

Santa: “Don’t leave me milk. Leave me whiskey.”

Going bananas on YouTube:

The urge to pee in the morning is so aggressive. Bro, like, chill we’re getting there. Don’t threaten to come out.

Going bananas on YouTube:

Tuah Kill a Hawkingbird

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