Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇪 has bookmarked:

I may be a chaotic mess, but then so is quantum physics.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has viewed:

I’m proud to announce that am winning my fight against sobriety.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has bookmarked:

Nobody gives me butterflies anymore. Y’all just give me brain damage.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has viewed:

How to have flat stomach: remove all of your organs.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has copied:

There should be a good 10 hours in between waking up and having to interact with people.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has copied:

I think I can now safely say that none of my co-workers were “personality hires”.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has copied:

Having a peanut allergy has to be so wild. Like, imagine you’re at a baseball game and there are people chucking bags of rattlesnakes past your head.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has downloaded:

Why can’t Chinese restaurants chop the broccoli in their dishes? I feel like I’m trying to fit an entire bonsai tree into my mouth.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has bookmarked:

I never wanted to become one of those adults who just find the music of the younger generation annoying. Nobody could have guessed that the music was just annoying.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has downloaded:

You’re acting up? Right before Santa Claus comes to town? Unbelievable.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,638

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Snapchat:

As a proud husband and father in my 40s, my New Year’s resolution is to sneeze even louder this year.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Group projects in school weren’t meant to teach you teamwork, they were meant to teach you how to deal with the incompetence of your coworkers in the workplace.

Live now on YouTube:

I like how people say “manage your depression,” like it’s a stock portfolio, but you’re heavily invested in sadness.

Trending via Twitch:

Drive like no one is watching.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

By the time my CVS receipt finished printing, I was eligible for another prescription refill.

Shared recently on WeChat:

I either text back right away or never, because I saw your text, replied in my head but forgot to actually type it.

Shared recently on WeChat:

Being an adult feels like, “If I can just get through this week, I’ll be okay,” but it’s every damn week.

Shared recently on X:

Has anyone lived long enough to buy a second bottle of Worcestershire sauce?

Live now on YouTube:

My dog sighs a lot for someone who doesn’t pay any bills.

Just shared via Snapchat:

Home is where the tap water doesn’t taste funny.

Funny wandering quotes

Funny wandering quotes bring a smile to every adventurous soul’s face 🌍😄 Whether you’re a daydreamer or a full-time explorer, these witty sayings capture the joy, mishaps, and unexpected laughs that come with getting lost (on purpose or not!) 🗺️🤣 Ready to wander with a grin and maybe a little wanderlust-fueled humor? Let’s dive into the lighter side of travel and discovery! ✈️😂✨

New funny wandering quotes 👇

All funny wandering quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

16 shares on Telegram this month:

I don’t hate anyone in particular, I just hate everyone in general.

29 shares on WhatsApp this month:

If my coworker doesn’t stop asking questions on this Zoom meeting, I will drive across town and slap his face on the call.

15 shares on X this month:

I always like to remember the time before the internet. It was so good not to know how cruel and stupid humanity really is.

25 shares on Pinterest this month:

I’m looking for a moisturizer to hide the fact that I’ve been tired since 2010.

30 shares on Reddit this month:

What part of “I don’t want to spend any more money” don’t I understand?

66 shares on Snapchat this month:

Christmas lights: the only thing bright around here besides my personality.

98 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I’m not your dream woman. I am the sudden shouting of ravens that you hear when you enter a part of the forest you shouldn’t have.

41 shares on Discord this month:

They call it a coffin because they’re finally coughing up that inheritance.

40 shares on X this month:

Ever woken up, kissed the person sleeping next to you and felt glad to be alive? I just did, so I won’t be catching this train again.

70 shares on Facebook this month:

Instead of calling it the John I’m going to start calling my bathroom the Jim. That way I can say I go to the Jim every morning.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

14 folks are currently checking 👀

I might start telling people I’m 10 years older than I actually am just so they can tell me how great I look for my age.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

I call my period Shark week. I want to eat everything, I’m snapping at people, I feel huge, people are scared of me, and there is blood everywhere.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

I’ve realized there’s more to life than social media, so I guess this is goodbye for the next 12 minutes.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m ready for the exciting last 30 seconds of the basketball game, which stretch into 25 minutes of fouls, time-outs, and commercials.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Everything is awful, and no one is going to save you from this treacherous world. Oops, I mean, happy Friday!

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Online shopping gives me a reason to live for another 3-5 business days.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Marriages are like pancakes. Sometimes you gotta throw the first one out.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

A poorly timed two-factor authentication request will be the thing that finally kills me.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Nothing says sexy like a pair of sensible, silky polka dot PJs.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Moving is legitimately one of the worst human experiences.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,614

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇷 has downloaded:

You should never forget where you came from. That’s probably where your keys are.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has shared:

I don’t have a five-year plan because every two years I realize I need a different life.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has downloaded:

Sorry, can’t make it, just remembered I don’t want to.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has viewed:

Dogs are like chicken nuggets; every time I see one, I want it.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has shared:

I am the first person in my bloodline to attempt to become hot, and I can feel my genes fighting me every step of the way.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has viewed:

This can’t be the same brain I was using to read 750-page novels in 3 days during middle school.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has downloaded:

I want to save money, but all I’m saving are memes.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has copied:

Me and my boys are broke, so we take turns taking pictures of one iced matcha.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has shared:

In 2007, if you wore a long-sleeve T-shirt under a regular T-shirt, it meant that you liked music.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has viewed:

Last time I laid on his chest, I heard girls in there laughing at me.

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on Reddit:

Keep posting, I’m diagnosing you.

Spotted on WeChat:

It really annoys me when people use the wrong word and don’t have the humidity to admit it.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

If there are parallel realities, I really hope they’re not as stupid as this one.

Going viral on Pinterest:

I had a sex dream last night that felt so real, I’m just gonna go ahead and add it to my body count.

Live now on Threads:

My Facebook friends are like my pen collection. I have 100 but only one writes.

Seen just now on Threads:

“Your call is very important to us. Please stay on the line until your call is no longer important to you.”

Going viral on Instagram:

Downloading the Titanic soundtrack. It’s syncing right now.

Going viral on X:

I hope Instagram is still active during the apocalypse, so the zombies can post pics of whose brains they’re currently eating.

Spreading quickly via Pinterest:

Christmas lights: the only thing bright around here besides my personality.

Going bananas on Instagram:

I stop myself at least twice a day from posting a status that would make everyone grab popcorn.

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