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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇱 has viewed:

Just heard my knee crack so loud I expected it to glow in the dark.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has shared:

If you bought 1 Bitcoin ten years ago, it would now be worth 1 Bitcoin. Let that sink in.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has viewed:

69 but we both just farting.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has copied:

Why is nobody questioning the quietness of the cosmos?

Someone from 🇦🇬 has copied:

For whom the Fetty Waps.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has downloaded:

If you can’t laugh at yourself, I will.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has shared:

For my final act of love, I will never contact you again, but think of you always.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has shared:

Commenting “AI slop” under pictures of my friends’ kids opening presents.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has viewed:

Jingle all the way? In this economy?

Someone from 🇳🇴 has viewed:

Foo fighters still fighting foo.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Jan 2, 2026

3,263

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Threads:

I need to hire someone to just constantly slap food out of my hand.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

You want me to pay attention to the details? The thing the devil is in?

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

How would someone cancel an appointment at a sperm bank? Do you just call them and say you can’t come?

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

Lies I tell myself: Just one more cookie. Just one more movie. Just one more minute.

Just shared via X:

Probably always gonna be the weirdo that believes in magic.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

I need a stunt double for when I’m navigating my way to the bathroom at night.

Making waves on WeChat:

We have now entered the void (25th December to 31st December).

Spotted on Pinterest:

Getting a random boner is a bit funny. Like, what is it, boy? What do you see?

Freshly posted on TikTok:

I could be staring at my hand locking my front door, and I still won’t feel 100% sure my front door was locked.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

Apparently, when you treat someone the same way they treat you, they get offended!

Funny whining quotes

Funny whining quotes 😩😂 are the perfect way to turn everyday grumbles into laughter! Whether you’re tired of minor hassles or just love a good moan with a twist, these witty lines will have you chuckling and nodding along. Ready to embrace your inner whiner with a smile? Let’s dive into some hilarious takes on life’s little annoyances! 🎉😜

New funny whining quotes 👇

Why do these women want to date Pete Davidson, a funny movie star, and not me, a guy who is whining?

0

2 months ago

date, guy, humor, jealousy, me, movie, movie star, Pete Davidson, relationship, star, want, whining, women
You’re in her DMs, she’s in my bed whining that it’s too cold. Can you come get her?

0

2 months ago

bed, cold, DM, humor, relationship, too, whining
Establish dominance over your children by whining louder.

0

2 months ago

authority, children, dominance, humor, over, parenting, whining
We went on a family vacation and it was a terrible experience. It was all whining, complaining, and tantrums. And don’t get me started on what my kids did.

0

2 months ago

complaining, experience, family, family vacation, kids, me, tantrum, terrible, terrible experience, vacation, whining
Every time my kids start whining, I get the urge to call my mom and apologize.

0

2 months ago

apologize, call, family, humor, i, kids, mom, parenting, relationship, start, time, urge, whining

All funny whining quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

60 shares on Facebook this month:

Asking people their favorite color and then calling them liars.

11 shares on LinkedIn this month:

If I could turn water into wine, I’d have lots of followers too.

86 shares on Instagram this month:

Autocorrect changed ‘are you around?’ to ‘are you aroused?’ and my buddy didn’t want to hang out today.

39 shares on WeChat this month:

“Follow your heart,” as advice, is sort of like “abandon yourself to cognitive bias.”

28 shares on Discord this month:

When I hear the word “horror”, the first thing I think of is bills, not Halloween.

37 shares on Messenger this month:

First date idea: we deactivate your Instagram.

53 shares on Twitch this month:

After an hour on this team meeting I’m not wanting to be a team player anymore.

67 shares on Discord this month:

Honey, get in the car. We have to go to the store because we’re retarded, and it’s Christmas Eve.

19 shares on TikTok this month:

I like online shopping and putting everything I want in a cart, then checking my subtotal and laughing and closing the tab.

96 shares on Twitch this month:

There should be a zoo that has people from every country in it.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Thank God for headphones and day dreaming.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Sitting in a room with my husband and kids… Suddenly I realize everyone here has been in my vagina. Wow.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Having to confirm your past purchases over the phone with your bank’s fraud department is a truly harrowing moment of self-examination for chronic little treat buyers.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

AirBnB is fun for when you want to be financially abused by a stranger with a binder filled with rules.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Shout out to Yamaha for being like, “Here’s a cool motorcycle. Also, here’s a cool piano.”

15 folks are currently checking 👀

8 planets, 204 countries, thousands of islands, 7 seas, 8 billion people, and I’m single.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

If kids these days had a perfume, it would be called Audacity.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

The only guarantee in life is, if you run errands looking like shit, you will run into everyone you haven’t seen in months.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Eating the sticker on an apple counts as 35% of your daily fiber intake.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

I can still drop it like it’s hot. It’s just a lot harder to pick it back up.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,525

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇩 has bookmarked:

Whenever I get up my cat gets up too and then yells at me like it’s my fault she decided we have to do this together.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has shared:

Nothing prepares you for the day you wake up and realize you have a favorite cardigan.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has downloaded:

How old were you when you realized others couldn’t see the matrix?

Someone from 🇯🇴 has copied:

I love eating fast food and getting big and fat. It’s amazing.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has downloaded:

January 1st: anything is possible. January 2nd: but not today.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has bookmarked:

My life is just a series of awkward moments separated by snacks.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has viewed:

There used to be many different names for the childhood game of knocking on doors and running away. But these days, it’s simply referred to as ‘being an Amazon driver’.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has viewed:

I was about to stop overthinking, then I thought of a giraffe having a sore throat.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has shared:

It’s only 9am and I’ve already ruined my son’s entire life by giving him the banana with the brown spot on it.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has viewed:

Tonight we shall read a passage from the old testicle.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Twitch:

If pigeons and chickens made a tribe, would they be called the coo clucks clan?

Going viral on Instagram:

Why can’t I explore the dentist’s mouth too?

Making waves on Instagram:

This football season, we need to bring back getting drunk and calling in to your team’s local radio show after the game. Such a lost art.

Shared recently on Instagram:

Hey! Remember in the first grade when we were all just chilling and then some kid would throw up out of nowhere?

Broadcasted on TikTok:

I was telling my sister that I’ve been going to the gym recently, and my nephew said, “You should go inside when you get there,” and I don’t think I’ll ever recover from that.

Spotted on Facebook:

Let’s all be grateful for a moment that stupidity is not contagious.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

I don’t like who I become when I’m watching someone Google something less efficiently than I would myself.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

Just blocked everyone who is not in my gang so if you’re reading this, we’re robbing a bank in 12 minutes.

Just shared via Snapchat:

My life goal is to make you feel as awkward or awesome as you are making me feel.

Shared recently on TikTok:

“How am I supposed to avoid Al when I’ve procrastinated on a paper?” With a night full of caffeine and nicotine like your forefathers, you babies.

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