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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇿 has copied:

Growing your own tomatoes really is the best way to devote 3 months of your life to saving $2.17.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has bookmarked:

If you saw me licking the plate after the charcuterie was finished, no you didn’t.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has bookmarked:

Laying in bed with the nervous system of someone going to war.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has copied:

I think one quality that makes me incredibly attractive is that I keep my mouth shut when I have nothing to say.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has viewed:

So tonight me and my phone are playing hide and seek. So far my phone is winning.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has downloaded:

I can easily spot a wolf in sheep’s clothing but this guy was dressed like my grandmother which threw me off.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has viewed:

Sometimes I look deep into my colleagues’ eyes to check if you really can’t see the back of their skulls.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has viewed:

Don’t tell me that everything was better in the past. I was there.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has shared:

Nothing says entitlement like a goose family crossing the road.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has bookmarked:

I suppose someone has to do all the consuming and obeying.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Feb 3, 2026

3,363

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Slack:

Due to intense brain fog all of my thoughts have been grounded until further notice.

Shared recently on Reddit:

Oh I’m sorry, did the middle of my sentence interrupt the beginning of yours?

Breaking via Twitch:

I leave the blue tick on WhatsApp so that people can see exactly when I wasn’t interested.

Spreading quickly via YouTube:

Whoever named the grapefruit when there was already a fruit named grape. Incompetent legend. I wish we could hang out.

Going viral on YouTube:

“Angry on the internet” is such an unfortunate personality.

Breaking via Discord:

Got too drunk in the Vietnamese restaurant last night, they said I can never go back. They banh mi.

Making waves on TikTok:

I do not like how Netflix threatens to start the movie while I’m just tryna read the description. Like, please, you’re making me anxious.

Seen just now on Facebook:

I’m not like other teenagers, I’m 51.

Broadcasted on WhatsApp:

Silicon Valley has taken over the world. Remember when nerds had the good manners to be ashamed of themselves?

Just landed via WeChat:

In medieval Europe, it was pretty easy to amass vast armies eager to go into battle and have their heads chopped off because no one wanted to be alive in medieval Europe.

Funny childhood memory quotes

Funny childhood memory quotes bring a burst of nostalgia and laughter 😂✨, reminding us of those silly moments that made growing up unforgettable. From mischievous adventures to innocent blunders, these quotes capture the magic of youth and the joy of carefree days 🌈🎈. Ready to smile, giggle, and maybe even cringe a little? Let’s dive into the funniest flashbacks that keep our inner child alive and kicking! 🎉😄

New funny childhood memory quotes 👇

I miss whatever age I was when I thought five dollars was a lot of money.

5 days ago

age, childhood, childhood memory, dollars, financial, financial perspective, five, i, innocence, lot, memory, miss, money, nostalgia, perspective, thought, whatever, youth
I miss being a kid. Nobody asks what my favorite dinosaur is anymore.

5 days ago

age, being, childhood, childhood memory, dinosaur, favorite, fun, humor, i, kid, memory, miss, nobody, nostalgia
Ever since I was a little girl, I have loved staying up really late, hanging out with myself, and thinking about stuff and things.

3 weeks ago

alone, alone time, childhood, childhood memory, ever, girl, hanging, i, introvert, late, late night, little, loved, memory, myself, night, night owl, owl, personal, personal time, reflection, self, self-reflection, staying, stuff, things, thinking, time

All funny childhood memory quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

82 shares on Snapchat this month:

If you see me sad, just hug me and put some money in my pocket.

70 shares on Messenger this month:

‘Blinded by the Light’ is really just a song about turning the bathroom light on in the middle of the night.

56 shares on Discord this month:

Airports are so funny. Like, “Oh, you’re flying across the country? Would you like to hang out in a mall first?”

69 shares on Telegram this month:

Walking into someone’s house with healthy, thriving houseplants everywhere: “Oh, I see you dabble in witchcraft!”

37 shares on Facebook this month:

Festival is when you pay a fortune to live like a homeless person.

64 shares on YouTube this month:

Apparently, all my new nephew wants to do is eat and sleep, which means he’s already a lot like me.

46 shares on WeChat this month:

Is 27 a good age to leave everything you know and love, and start over?

19 shares on Slack this month:

I wrote a book. It’s a murder mystery. You’re in it but only for the first couple of chapters.

38 shares on TikTok this month:

If you know karate, you shouldn’t have to pay for stuff.

53 shares on Facebook this month:

The subtle art of letting yourself go crazy once in a while.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Do animals have celebrities? Like, do birds all recognize that one bird who sings really well?

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Mario Kart gave me unrealistic expectations of how banana peels affect traffic.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Sure I collect antiques, if you count the late-century spices in my pantry.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

People don’t catch bullets with their teeth anymore, get out there and practice.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

I bet the guy who named the sperm whale wasn’t allowed to name things anymore after that.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

They’re making me do work at work.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

The most surprising part of adulthood is parenting your parents.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

I embarrass myself in front of myself.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

When I’m in a good mood, I go to my blocked list and release one or two prisoners.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Name a better duo than sad and depressed.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,684

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇿 has viewed:

I bought a watermelon and all I can think about is filling it with vodka.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has shared:

I would like to see the USA go metric before I die, just so I can enjoy the outrage that would follow.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has shared:

I’m already far too stressed as it is. And then you also have to have time to just sit there and do nothing.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has downloaded:

Shout out to all you people out there who get asked if you’re okay a lot even though that’s the only facial expression you have.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has copied:

The introverted urge to spend a week alone at home after many holidays and family gatherings.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has shared:

Jeez. It’s like the people in this nursing home have never heard techno before.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has viewed:

Can’t, holding a grudge.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has viewed:

Losing weight is basically all about being cold 90% of the time.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has bookmarked:

The leading cause for injury in old men is them thinking they are still young men.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has shared:

What archaeologists are really looking for is a hand digging back.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Threads:

The amount of water you actually need to drink to be hydrated is so obscene. Who does this body think it is? A data center?

Just landed via WhatsApp:

Due to rising prices, Dollar Tree is changing their name to ‘Tree Fiddy’.

Just shared via YouTube:

Maybe the reason Miss Piggy is still single is she has a fear of kermitment.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

I will selflessly protect my family from a life of diabetes by eating all the sweets myself.

Shared recently on Slack:

To the guy who invented zero, thanks for nothing.

Seen just now on Discord:

Are you stupid, sand? You could just lay here forever on this beautiful beach, but no, you have to try with all you’ve got, to get into my shoes.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

Having a conversation with me is kind of like taking the scenic route.

Just shared via Snapchat:

I think nervous flatulence would be helpful if you were ever kidnapped.

Making waves on Twitch:

Apologies for the delays. The suitcase smashing machine has broken down, so we’re having to smash suitcases by hand.

Live now on X:

If consuming too much caffeine causes short-term memory loss, just imagine what consuming too much caffeine can do.

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